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Things that make no sense but you understand them.


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34 minutes ago, DocWard said:

"Ain't got the common sense God gave a crowbar."

 

"Dumber than a sack (or poke) full of hammers"

 

Then there's "Tarnation." Now, I've never been sure what, or where, tarnation is. Or maybe it's neither, It could be an action?

 

"What in Tarnation were you thinking?"

 

"How in Tarnation did you do that?"

 

And while I'm thinking of it, why was Jehoshaphat Jumping?

We were taught tarnation was to be cursed to hell, like damnation.    Jehosephat was supposedly how Jesus is said in another language, I never asked why he was jumping.

 

To door to door salesmen: she needs that like she needs another hole in the head.

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4 hours ago, sassnetguy50 said:

Jehosephat was supposedly how Jesus is said in another language, I never asked why he was jumping.

Probably the same reason he was on a crutch or a bicycle.

Christ on a crutch

Christ on a bicycle

:wacko:

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8 hours ago, sassnetguy50 said:

We were taught tarnation was to be cursed to hell, like damnation.    Jehosephat was supposedly how Jesus is said in another language, I never asked why he was jumping.

 

To door to door salesmen: she needs that like she needs another hole in the head.

Pretty much this. Origin of tarnation:

 

https://www.etymonline.com/word/tarnation#:~:text=tarnation (n.),God) (see eternal).

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“Bright as a cave!”

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You’d lose your head if it wasn’t screwed on.

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Don’t like school? That’s fine the world is always going to need ditch diggers and pole dancers.

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Are you sick or is it the whiskey flu?

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Posted (edited)

Plain asa diamond ina goats a$$

 

Yer gonna hum lika a 10 penny finishin nail hit with a greasy ball pean hammer.

Edited by Moonshine 20515
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I can explain the "faster than $**t through a goose" thing 

 

Ducks and geese do not have a sphincter muscle...so as soon as something goes in,  something will come out. 

 

There ya go....whatever that means. 

 

CS 

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When referring to splitting wood the old fashion way by hand my grandfather used to say “ you split a tree from the top and a woman from the bottom” of course my grandmother never heard him say that !

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Makes more racket than two tomcats with their tails tied together and throwed over a clothesline!

 

Meaner ‘n a burlap bag full of rattlesnakes!

 

Madder ‘n a she cat with her tail tied in a knot!

 

Stinks like a pissed off polecat in an outhouse!

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1 minute ago, One Gun Jimmy said:

Always heard "fighting like cats and dogs"

 

My pair have proven that to mean not fighting very much at all haha

20230319_232050.thumb.jpg.666ebe12bc9b3c202ad120b25b7d1100.jpg

Where I grew up, "raining cats & dogs".

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He doesn't have sense enough to pour piss out of a boot.

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16 minutes ago, Tex Wilson said:

He doesn't have sense enough to pour piss out of a boot.


…with the instructions on the heel!! :o :lol:

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On 5/27/2023 at 10:29 AM, Moonshine 20515 said:

Plain asa diamond ina goats a$$

 

Yer gonna hum lika a 10 penny finishin nail hit with a greasy ball pean hammer.

My bunk mate in 'Nam, an Arkansawyer:  "Here we are in sunny South Vietnam, paradise of the far east, a vacation paradise, sparkling in the sun and shining like a diamond in a goat's a$$."  I never heard it before nor again until now.

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"He's missing a couple dots on his dice"

 

"He's traveling with an empty sea bag"

 

"You're nothing but an anchor"

 

" Not the brightest bulb on the tree"

      or

"Not the sharpest knife in the drawer"

 

" Those two, don't hitch horses well together"

 

 

 

 

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If you don't stop crying, I'll give you something to cry about. :wacko:

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