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Insults.


Subdeacon Joe

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Posted

Actually that's not an insult, that's a curse.

 

Like this:

 

May you die and be reincarnated as a chandelier, to hang by day and burn by night.

Posted
3 hours ago, Finagler 6853 Life said:

Sir Winston, you are drunk.  

Madam, you are correct but you are ugly and in the morning I shall be sober.  (or something like that)

Along the same lines:

"You're fat!"

"Yes, but you're ugly, and I can always lose weight!"

Posted

may the bird of paradise fly up your nose ......may your wife be plagued with runners in her hose , 

Posted
7 hours ago, Major E A Sterner #12916 said:

Innocent Marine? Not guilty maybe, But never innocent.(My father was a Gunny)

Point taken, and thanks.  Tell your dad Semper fi from one gunny to another.  :FlagAm:

Posted

Unfortunately, He didn't come back from Nam and is on the wall in DC.

Posted

"Every time you open your mouth, everyone within hearing distance loses IQ points."

 

"I have to spend a year in this god forsaken place, please don't make me spend it listening to your stupidity."

 

(Both heard during deployment)

Posted

You look like you been bopped with an ugly stick!

Posted

Don’t be ashamed of who you are. That’s your parents’ job.

 

If you’re going to be two-faced, at least make one of them pretty.

 

You've been an idiot your entire life. Why not take today off?

Posted

Did your folks have any kids that weren't so butt ugly?

Posted

These days; “Hello, I’m (fill in the blank) and I am running for President”

Posted

Were you born or hatched?

  • 3 months later...
Posted
1 hour ago, Allie Mo, SASS No. 25217 said:

Dad to Brother: Your mother has a little brain.

 

 

How long was he in the hospital?

I can FEEL the glare she must have given him!

Posted
13 hours ago, Allie Mo, SASS No. 25217 said:

The following is one my father used on my mother who was arguing with my brother.

Mom to Dad: Tell name I have a little brain.

Dad to Brother: Your mother has a little brain.

Even I know that's was a bad idea.:blink:

 

She's already irritated by the argument, a reply so lame that it insults her intelligence, AND then he pulls something like that?

 

How long was he sleeping on the porch for that one?

Posted

"Did your parents have any children that lived?"

 

"Are there any branches in your family tree or is it a straight line"

 

"You're the poster boy for prophylactic"

 

"I noticed the cat keeps trying to bury you in the sandbox"

Posted
1 hour ago, Tennessee williams said:

You're old as Chantry's insults...:ph34r::P

Ouch!

Posted
7 hours ago, Chantry said:

"Did your parents have any children that lived?"

 

"Are there any branches in your family tree or is it a straight line"

 

"You're the poster boy for prophylactic"

 

"I noticed the cat keeps trying to bury you in the sandbox"

 

3 hours ago, Tennessee williams said:

You're old as Chantry's insults...:ph34r::P

Yeah, I about kicked the slats out of my cradle the first time I heard those.:blink:

Posted
3 hours ago, Tennessee williams said:

You're old as Chantry's insults...:ph34r::P

 

24 minutes ago, Sgt. C.J. Sabre, SASS #46770 said:

 

Yeah, I about kicked the slats out of my cradle the first time I heard those.:blink:

 

May the both of you be forced to listen to a non-stop week of the Barney song while having to watch the former first lady from Arkansas dance nude.

Posted

That's not an insult, that's a curse. Like this one:

 

May you die and be reincarnated as a chandelier, to hang by day and burn by night.

Posted

You truly have a face that only a mother could love :P

Posted

My wife gave me a good one once.  I was reading something on a forum (yes, it was the Wire) and getting really aggravated.  She looked over my shoulder and said "you can't win a pissing contest with a prick"

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