DocWard Posted January 3, 2019 Share Posted January 3, 2019 I don't even know where to begin. Several people close to me having serious issues. Mental health issues that I am struggling to help with, and physical health issues that I can only sit and wait to find out if they will make it. I hope this doesn't keep up. Think I will stick to coffee, because if I start drinking something harder, I might be in for a bender. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sixgun Sheridan Posted January 3, 2019 Share Posted January 3, 2019 I feel your pain Pard, this year is off to a bad start for me as well. Fortunately we've got the posse here on the Saloon to lean on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hillbilly Drifter Posted January 3, 2019 Share Posted January 3, 2019 Sorry to hear this Doc. Difficult times. Stay strong Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eyesa Horg Posted January 3, 2019 Share Posted January 3, 2019 May things work out and improve for ya Doc. Prayers Up Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chickasaw Bill SASS #70001 Posted January 3, 2019 Share Posted January 3, 2019 fell your pain , kinda the same around here I figure the best I can do is hold my ground hope it get better Chickasaw Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Allie Mo, SASS No. 25217 Posted January 3, 2019 Share Posted January 3, 2019 I'm so sorry that you gents are having a bad start to the new year. For me, it couldn't get any worse than 2018 or 2017 or the previous four years. At least I hope so. Keep on keeping on! We, here in the Saloon (ACS) our true friends. I consider bofaya to be that. Best regards for a happy and prosperous new year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J. Mark Flint #31954 LIFE Posted January 3, 2019 Share Posted January 3, 2019 I've been in a similar boat for a while and appear to be passenger for some time to come. I commend you for being a caring individual. A less evolved person would cut and run. You know what your sense of honor requires of you and take comfort in that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blackwater 53393 Posted January 3, 2019 Share Posted January 3, 2019 The last few months have been a downer!! I'm hoping that events of the last few days are an indicator of better things to come!! Here's hoping that we ALL see better time soon!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Utah Bob #35998 Posted January 4, 2019 Share Posted January 4, 2019 I feel your pain, pard. I never drink during bad times either. It doesn’t halp a bit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tex Jones, SASS 2263 Posted January 4, 2019 Share Posted January 4, 2019 Hang in there, Doc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocWard Posted January 4, 2019 Author Share Posted January 4, 2019 1 hour ago, J. Mark Flint #31954 LIFE said: I've been in a similar boat for a while and appear to be passenger for some time to come. I commend you for being a caring individual. A less evolved person would cut and run. You know what your sense of honor requires of you and take comfort in that. Curious you say that, because one of the people is my youngest daughter's now ex-boyfriend, whom I had grown somewhat close to in a paternal sort of way. Or maybe an NCO sort of way... Or perhaps those two are related. At any rate, she was concerned, and wanted me to reach out to him, and do what I can, despite their differences, and I've spent some time with him the past couple of weeks. A couple of nights back, I spent the evening, into the morning hours , talking and texting with him to make sure he was OK. I spent last night the same way, and he was, as of last report, at a hospital. We'll see where all of this leads. Of course, the drama, along with much more going on in her life, has reached well beyond my daughter's ability to cope, and has created even more issues. While dealing with all of this yesterday, I got word that a good friend, also my guitar instructor, who is the same age I am, had a massive heart attack. As of today, it is unclear what his prognosis is, but it isn't promising. About a week ago, when trying to explain my daughter's anxiety to me, my wife said that on a scale of 1-10, most people live life in the 3-4 range when it comes to stress. She also said I am atypical, because I tend to live in the 0-1 range. I simply don't stress about most things. Earlier today, she asked me if I'm OK and handling all of this alright. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Calamity Kris Posted January 4, 2019 Share Posted January 4, 2019 Prayers up to all who are experiencing troubles this year. May things resolve for the better for all of you. Doc, lean away. You've been there for us, it's our turn. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cholla Posted January 4, 2019 Share Posted January 4, 2019 Tell me about it. I was working up a batch of venison snack sticks on New Years Eve morning when my visiting daughter started checking through her husband's cell phone that he had left out. She suspected that he was cheating and she was right. After the dust settled he admitted to having 31 accounts on dating and free sex websites. I had introduced him to CAS and reloading and treated him like a son, so this hurts on many levels. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Capt. R. Hugh Kidnme Posted January 4, 2019 Share Posted January 4, 2019 Hoping you catch a break soon, Doc. And, drinking during hard times is not recommended. Trust me on that one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sedalia Dave Posted January 4, 2019 Share Posted January 4, 2019 Doc, Bless you for helping that young man seek out professional counseling. I'll keep you and yours in my thoughts. May you be happy. May you be well. May you be safe. May you be peaceful and at ease. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sixgun Sheridan Posted January 4, 2019 Share Posted January 4, 2019 48 minutes ago, Cholla said: Tell me about it. I was working up a batch of venison snack sticks on New Years Eve morning when my visiting daughter started checking through her husband's cell phone that he had left out. She suspected that he was cheating and she was right. After the dust settled he admitted to having 31 accounts on dating and free sex websites. I had introduced him to CAS and reloading and treated him like a son, so this hurts on many levels. He sounds just like one of my friend's ex-husbands. He became her ex after she found out he was basically addicted to sex and was doing all sorts of things late at night and behind her back. It's a shame because they have a couple of very nice kids, 11 and 14, and both now hate his guts. This past summer I found out that my wife was cheating on me as well, and now she wants to go her own way and be a free bird. It felt like a punch to the gut because in our 15 years together I never once strayed, never left her alone at home, and always did what she wanted on weekends instead of what I wanted. Despite that she ended up getting tired of the married life and now wants to be single again. Fortunately we don't have any kids otherwise our eventual split would be a lot more complicated. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maddog McCoy SASS #5672 Posted January 4, 2019 Share Posted January 4, 2019 Last year was not good, and I am glad to see it gone. My dad said he felt this would not be a good year for the family in January of 2018, and he was right. In January, my grandmother died and I lost my job, had to sell almost everything in Alabama and move what was left into a storage unit and moved in Grandma empty trailer in Illinois. Found a job and moved to Kentucky, still missing a lot of stuff I had to dump so I could move. One of my nieces her husband left her, refuses to pay child support on the 2 boys (1 1/2 and 3 years old), she moved into grandma's trailer. One niece totaled her car, my dad's suburban, and died just before Thanksgiving in her sleep at 30 years old from a migraine headache. She left a 10 year old daughter that goes to her ex-husband that lives 200 miles from the our family. ( lots of problems with that and my sister is a mess as she moved back to Illinois to help raise her granddaughter in July and now she will be gone). My divorce from my wife was finalized after being married 32 years and together 38 years. These are the highlights, I have forgotten some of the details. My family will not miss 2018 being over. I wish you'll well and hope this year is better than the last one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocWard Posted January 4, 2019 Author Share Posted January 4, 2019 It seems my own challenges, and my discussion of them, has opened others to the discussion of their wounds. To the extent doing so is cathartic, I am thankful that is so. My sympathies go out to those who have faced their own issues in the past year and are doing so now. You will all be in my thoughts and meditations. Coffee anyone? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Henry T Harrison Posted January 4, 2019 Share Posted January 4, 2019 I welcomed 2019 in by starting Chemo therapy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pat Riot Posted January 4, 2019 Share Posted January 4, 2019 When things really start hitting me the wrong way or getting me down I like to say The Serenity Prayer out load. Oh, it’s not do much to talk to God but more of an affirmation to myself to not let things take me out of control. It goes like this: Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change. The courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. Simple but powerful. At least for me it is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocWard Posted January 4, 2019 Author Share Posted January 4, 2019 6 minutes ago, Pat Riot, SASS #13748 said: When things really start hitting me the wrong way or getting me down I like to say The Serenity Prayer out load. Oh, it’s not do much to talk to God but more of an affirmation to myself to not let things take me out of control. It goes like this: Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change. The courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. Simple but powerful. At least for me it is. Indeed, it is, and something to remember. One of the reasons Mrs. Doc says that I have such a low level of stress is, in part, because I tend to simply work to fix or change those things I am able, and accept my limitations in doing so. As I have often explained, worrying doesn't help matters. Being mindful is often a help. The events of the past few days have sort of piled on enough to challenge my abilities, with each new bit of news hitting with a shock. I spend most of my meditation focused on what is referred to as vipassana meditation, or enlightenment meditation. It focuses on awareness, and typically involves paying attention to breathing and sensations. Distractions are noted and discarded. Metta meditation is the meditation of loving-kindness, and is more akin to prayer for others. Sedalia Dave provided a form of the meditation in his comment, I quoted below. In metta, one always begins with self focus, wishing yourself happiness, wellness, etc... Then extending that to others. For me, it serves much the same purpose as you describe. 1 hour ago, Sedalia Dave said: Doc, Bless you for helping that young man seek out professional counseling. I'll keep you and yours in my thoughts. May you be happy. May you be well. May you be safe. May you be peaceful and at ease. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Allie Mo, SASS No. 25217 Posted January 4, 2019 Share Posted January 4, 2019 I wish I could share my sadness with you. Luckily, my home life is good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sedalia Dave Posted January 4, 2019 Share Posted January 4, 2019 50 minutes ago, DocWard said: Coffee anyone? Not a regular coffee drinker but I'd be honored to have a cup with you anytime. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474 Posted January 4, 2019 Share Posted January 4, 2019 To all my Pards here in SASS, I'll keep you in my prayers. Stay strong and remember you can get through these times and that having friends helps. I'm waging my own battle with cancer, but I'm looking ahead to better times. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Allie Mo, SASS No. 25217 Posted January 4, 2019 Share Posted January 4, 2019 7 minutes ago, Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474 said: To all my Pards here in SASS, I'll keep you in my prayers. Stay strong and remember you can get through these times and that having friends helps. I'm waging my own battle with cancer, but I'm looking ahead to better times. Best wishes to kick C's butt. ya, Allie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474 Posted January 4, 2019 Share Posted January 4, 2019 Merci beaucoup! (Thank-you kindly.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocWard Posted January 4, 2019 Author Share Posted January 4, 2019 24 minutes ago, Sedalia Dave said: Not a regular coffee drinker but I'd be honored to have a cup with you anytime. It'd be an honor and a pleasure. Heck, we could just have soft drinks. Maybe even tea, which I've been known to accept from time to time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocWard Posted January 4, 2019 Author Share Posted January 4, 2019 22 minutes ago, Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474 said: To all my Pards here in SASS, I'll keep you in my prayers. Stay strong and remember you can get through these times and that having friends helps. I'm waging my own battle with cancer, but I'm looking ahead to better times. 13 minutes ago, Allie Mo, SASS No. 25217 said: Best wishes to kick C's butt. ya, Allie What she said. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Henry T Harrison Posted January 4, 2019 Share Posted January 4, 2019 24 minutes ago, Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474 said: To all my Pards here in SASS, I'll keep you in my prayers. Stay strong and remember you can get through these times and that having friends helps. I'm waging my own battle with cancer, but I'm looking ahead to better times. We will both be fine It’s a rocky road but we will win this battle and come out stronger at the end. You have my phone number if you ever need to talk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474 Posted January 4, 2019 Share Posted January 4, 2019 Thanks Henry. Talking to you eased some of my anxiety. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Noz Posted January 4, 2019 Share Posted January 4, 2019 8 hours ago, DocWard said: It seems my own challenges, and my discussion of them, has opened others to the discussion of their wounds. To the extent doing so is cathartic, I am thankful that is so. My sympathies go out to those who have faced their own issues in the past year and are doing so now. You will all be in my thoughts and meditations. Coffee anyone? Yes, Please. I'd like mine with a bit of Irish in it. We consider 2018 as the "lost" year. Cancer diagnoses, treatment and recovery from said treatment filled the year. BUT, I feel better, finances are in order, cancer prognosis is good, exercising daily and watching Miss Lorrie qualify for her YMCA "2500" mile walking T-shirt. I have good friends, new great-grandson, both daughters in a good place and big cowboy plans for 2019. All-in-all, I'm alive and probably as healthy as I have any right to be given some past excesses, have the love of a good woman, who is also in good health, that I have been married to for 58 years and devoted to for 61 years. Let me buy the drinks here in the Saloon and wish better conditions for those of you that are hurting and congratulations to those who are not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jabez Cowboy,SASS # 50129 Posted January 4, 2019 Share Posted January 4, 2019 Allie Mo ; God Bless you ... Jabez Cowboy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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