A Not So Merry Christmas Present

[Yul Lose]

So I entered a couple of boxes in an art show just before Thanksgiving and there was a piece of sculpture there (not quite what Mrs. Lose called it) and I thought that it would make a great Christmas present for my wife. I cut a deal with the guy and paid him for it and took a picture of it to show my wife. 
 

I got home and showed her the pictures and she didn’t say anything and just raised her eyebrows and walked off. My daughter is here on a visit for my birthday and I told her about the sculpture and she wanted to see it this afternoon. So I took her out to my truck because I had it hidden in the back seat and knew my wife would never look there. My daughter took one look and started laughing hysterically and when she regained her composure enough she said “You’re not really going to give her that, are you?” Needless to say I was absolutely crushed by her reaction and told her that I’d paid a lot of money for it because I knew my wife would love “a piece of art” like that. My daughter assured me that her mother would absolutely not think much of that “piece of art”.

 

So later on my wife was in the office and my daughter and I were in the living room and  nearly every time she looked at me she would laugh. I asked her to go out to my truck and get “the piece of art” and bring it in and set it on the mantle to see if Mrs. Lose really liked it or not. She hated it. My daughter took a video of her reaction to it just for entertainment purposes in the future. 
 

So this splendid “piece of artwork” is going to end up as a white elephant gift or maybe I can pay the guy opening up the new pawn shop up the street to take it off of my hands.

 

My daughter mentioned the Christmas Story connection, the leg lamp in the living room window,

 

 

 

 

Edited December 10, 2024 by Yul Lose

[Widder, SASS #59054]

I think its hilarious,, also.

 

Merry Christmas.

 

..........Widder

 

[Rip Snorter]

It goes both ways.  My dear wife of 40 plus years has given me many gifts that were "close enough" to what I actually wanted that I could never justify buying the real thing.  I gotta say, having some experience in cast and welded art, I never saw anything quite like that!

Edited December 10, 2024 by Rip Snorter
Typo

[Pat Riot]

It looks like someone started to make a sculpture of a Picasso painting, smoked a joint then got “creative”. 

[Yul Lose]

Deleted.

 

Edited December 10, 2024 by Yul Lose

[Yul Lose]

1 hour ago, Rip Snorter said:

It goes both ways.  My dear wife of 40 plus years has given me many gifts that were "close enough" to what I actually wanted that I could never justify buying the real thing.  I gotta say, having some experience in cast and welded art, I never saw anything quite like that!

Yep, it a one of a kind for sure.

[Widder, SASS #59054]

Looks like a TransvesCactus or Cactusvestite.

 

..........Widder

 

 

 

[watab kid]

i quit trying to get my wife anything we just sit down and discuss what we need this year - then we make it happen , shared enjoyment works better than gifts we generally agree on what we need/want as well , she shops for family [i think she likes doing it] i get to help wrap sometimes , 

[Chickasaw Bill SASS #70001]

I have made it easier for myself , I ask what is wanted/needed 

 

that or a stack of cash , keeps me out of the dog house , SOMETIMES 

 

  CB 

[Cypress Sun]

Tell her that it's Italian, that might work!

 

It's fragilee.

[Eyesa Horg]

Better stick with items of wood Yul. Yeh!

[Eyesa Horg]

Bought Ellie a shotgun once for Christmas many years ago. It went over like that sculpture! 

[Forty Rod SASS 3935]

9 hours ago, Rip Snorter said:

It goes both ways.  My dear wife of 40 plus years has given me many gifts that were "close enough" to what I actually wanted that I could never justify buying the real thing.  I gotta say, having some experience in cast and welded art, I never saw anything quite like that!

And I hope I never do again.

 

 Sorry Yul, but you found a masterfully created POS that I would not have in my house.  

[Tell Sackett SASS 18436]

12 hours ago, Rip Snorter said:

It goes both ways.  My dear wife of 40 plus years has given me many gifts that were "close enough" to what I actually wanted that I could never justify buying the real thing.  I gotta say, having some experience in cast and welded art, I never saw anything quite like that!

Yep!

Remember the Dick VanDyke show episode with “eine zach” that she loved and he hated?

[Eyesa Horg]

I do feel for ya though Yul. Sucks when you think you found something cool, but nope, it's a no go!

[Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474]

Well Yul, your wife and daughter have good taste.

You, unfortunately,  on the other hand.........................

But you are a good husband and Father and have a lot of friends, so find solace in that Pard.

[Eyesa Horg]

Ask twice what paid at the next art show and then give 20% off, somebody will buy it. After all, you did. Saw on the tube the other day, someone paid over 32 million for Dorothy's red slippers! 28 plus fees!

Edited December 10, 2024 by Eyesa Horg

[Texas Maverick]

I think you should feel lucky you aren't sleeping in said truck with the sculpture. LOL

 

TM

[Texas Lizard]

5 hours ago, Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474 said:

Well Yul, your wife and daughter have good taste.

You, unfortunately,  on the other hand.........................

But you are a good husband and Father and have a lot of friends, so find solace in that Pard.

And someone will have an open couch for you to sleep on......

 

Texas Lizard

Edited December 10, 2024 by Texas Lizard

[Abilene Slim SASS 81783]

Does it have a plug or use batteries?

[Yul Lose]

1 hour ago, Abilene Slim SASS 81783 said:

Does it have a plug or use batteries?

No.

[Abilene Slim SASS 81783]

2 hours ago, Yul Lose said:

No.

I was thinking of the Ralphy lamp. Crude attempt at a joke on my part. Ya done good thinking of her, pard. It was a sweet gift.  😊

 

Edited December 11, 2024 by Abilene Slim SASS 81783

[John Kloehr]

Art is supposed to make the viewer think.

 

I'm thinking if you donated it to a gun club for use in a side match charging $5 to take a shot at it, you might raise a bunch to feed the needy and also take a write-off for the purchase.

 

Art should always be a public benefit.

[Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984]

I bet the artist hurried to cash your check.

[Texas Maverick]

4 hours ago, Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 said:

I bet the artist hurried to cash your check.

and laughed all the way to the bank. LOL

 

TM

[Capt. R. Hugh Kidnme]

I've been there a few times meownself. Bought it thinking she'd love it, and it went over like the electric soup spoon. 

 

You can maybe try an incantation over it; to see if it will morph into something more ...........regular. If nothing happens, donate it to Goodwill.

 

 If a genie pops out though, I get the first wish.

[Yul Lose]

My pards that saw it yesterday call it “Yul’s Folly”.

[Renegade Plowboy]

….  Pardon the interruption. Screen cleaning in progress. 

Edited December 11, 2024 by Renegade Plowboy
Edited for content

[Renegade Plowboy]

On 12/9/2024 at 10:22 PM, Pat Riot said:

It looks like someone started to make a sculpture of a Picasso painting, smoked a joint then got “creative”. 

 

1 hour ago, Yul Lose said:

My pards that saw it yesterday call it “Yul’s Folly”.

 
 

I’m not sure which of these two is funnier.!!  
 

Thanks guys, you made me clean my screen.  I can see clearly now again!!  

Edited December 11, 2024 by Renegade Plowboy

[Sedalia Dave]

Don't attend any Christmas parties where @Yul Lose will be in attendance.  He'll be passing it along as his contribution to the White Elephant gift exchange.

[Yul Lose]

Just now, Sedalia Dave said:

Don't attend any Christmas parties where @Yul Lose will be in attendance.  He'll be passing it along as his contribution to the White Elephant gift exchange.

My wife’s family has a big Xmas Eve get together and guess what my White Elephant gift is gonna be? Oughta be fun to watch.

[Sedalia Dave]

45 minutes ago, Yul Lose said:

My wife’s family has a big Xmas Eve get together and guess what my White Elephant gift is gonna be? Oughta be fun to watch.

 

Better make sure the dog house is well stocked.  

[watab kid]

ill not criticize what you got - i was never good at that , i will ask why ? just a question no flames or bolts oof lightening coming from here , im curios what made you believe she would like it ? 

[Yul Lose]

6 hours ago, watab kid said:

ill not criticize what you got - i was never good at that , i will ask why ? just a question no flames or bolts oof lightening coming from here , im curios what made you believe she would like it ? 

She’s been making noise about adding a piece of artwork to her office and some of the stuff she likes is different, let’s say and this piece definitely is different.

[Chickasaw Bill SASS #70001]

when ya swing for the fence , to make em happy , once in a great while ya will connect 

 

 BUT , most of the time , (in my case ) ya STRIKE OUT 

 

  CB