Widder, SASS #59054 Posted August 7, 2023 Posted August 7, 2023 TN Williams told me this past weekend that he was a little concerned about his life insurance and how it might have been a waste of money to pay up his premiums AND pay off his burial plot last year. He said now he is worried that he could be abducted by Aliens so he called his insurance agent today to get $100K policy coverage for Alien Abduction for a very low monthly premium. Now, he says, he has a little piece of mind for his family in case of BORG, Klingon or Zuqoliak attack. Personally, I think the Body Snatchers have already taken him over..... ..........Widder
Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 Posted August 7, 2023 Posted August 7, 2023 How about the Romulans? and the cardassians?
Sgt. C.J. Sabre, SASS #46770 Posted August 7, 2023 Posted August 7, 2023 9 minutes ago, Widder, SASS #59054 said: Personally, I think the Body Snatchers have already taken him over..... ..........Widder More likely the Human Form Replicators. Or maybe a previously unknown Cylon Skinjob.
Crooked River Pete, SASS 43485 Posted August 7, 2023 Posted August 7, 2023 I wouldn't worry about them outer space guys, will it pay out for the Aliens coming over the southern boarder?
Tennessee williams Posted August 7, 2023 Posted August 7, 2023 11 minutes ago, Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 said: How about the Romulans? and the cardassians?
Tennessee williams Posted August 8, 2023 Posted August 8, 2023 19 minutes ago, Widder, SASS #59054 said: Now, he says, he has a little piece of mind for his family in case of Zuqoliak attack. ..........Widder The Zuqoliaks are a race of all female species. They look like real purty miniature Amazons. They are known to all that know them as being sex addicts. The last time they got to me, the bunkhouse boss was out of town for work. Them Zuqoliaks chained me in my basement and had their way with me multiple times. They'd do what they wanted and then leave for an hour an come back for more "experimentations" without leaving me so much as bread and water. After a couple days, I was able to break loose and made it to a phone to order a pizza and cold pepsi. I almost didn't make it back to the basement and chain myself up before they returned. It was a close call. When they finished up with me, they said they'd be back in a couple months or so. I've been hiding out from them in my pasture with a couple of high powered flashlights just in case they show up early.
Widder, SASS #59054 Posted August 8, 2023 Author Posted August 8, 2023 I heard you've also got Domino's automatically delivering Pizza to your house every other day....... just in case. I guess a feller just can't be to careful. P.S. - are you taking reservations for friends to visit you anytime soon? ..........Widder
Jabez Cowboy,SASS # 50129 Posted August 8, 2023 Posted August 8, 2023 TW I don't know how Ya finds time ta Shoot with all that Drama in yer Life... Jabez Cowboy
Widder, SASS #59054 Posted August 8, 2023 Author Posted August 8, 2023 48 minutes ago, Jabez Cowboy,SASS # 50129 said: TW I don't know how Ya finds time ta Shoot with all that Drama in yer Life... Jabez Cowboy One of those aliens has 'Lifeform Replicator' ability. So, when TW is locked up in his basement being abused, the Replicator is at the Cowboy match, making everyone think that TW really knows how to shoot. True story..... ya just can't make this stuff up. ..........Widder
Dirty Dan Dawkins Posted August 8, 2023 Posted August 8, 2023 1 hour ago, Widder, SASS #59054 said: TN Williams told me this past weekend that he was a little concerned about his life insurance and how it might have been a waste of money to pay up his premiums AND pay off his burial plot last year. He said now he is worried that he could be abducted by Aliens so he called his insurance agent today to get $100K policy coverage for Alien Abduction for a very low monthly premium. Now, he says, he has a little piece of mind for his family in case of BORG, Klingon or Zuqoliak attack. Personally, I think the Body Snatchers have already taken him over..... ..........Widder Don’t laugh. It could happen to you!
Dirty Dan Dawkins Posted August 8, 2023 Posted August 8, 2023 1 hour ago, Tennessee williams said: The Zuqoliaks are a race of all female species. They look like real purty miniature Amazons. They are known to all that know them as being sex addicts. The last time they got to me, the bunkhouse boss was out of town for work. Them Zuqoliaks chained me in my basement and had their way with me multiple times. They'd do what they wanted and then leave for an hour an come back for more "experimentations" without leaving me so much as bread and water. After a couple days, I was able to break loose and made it to a phone to order a pizza and cold pepsi. I almost didn't make it back to the basement and chain myself up before they returned. It was a close call. When they finished up with me, they said they'd be back in a couple months or so. I've been hiding out from them in my pasture with a couple of high powered flashlights just in case they show up early. Don’t laugh. It could happen to you.
Badlands Bob #61228 Posted August 8, 2023 Posted August 8, 2023 If TN Williams goes willingly, that's not really an abduction, therefore the insurance company doesn't have to pay up.
Tennessee williams Posted August 8, 2023 Posted August 8, 2023 1 hour ago, Jabez Cowboy,SASS # 50129 said: TW I don't know how Ya finds time ta Shoot with all that Drama in yer Life... Jabez Cowboy I shoot duelist. Everything I do has to be done with overwhelming efficiency and extreme confidence. Probably why them dang Zuqoliaks keep coming back to torment me. 4 minutes ago, Badlands Bob #61228 said: If TN Williams goes willingly, that's not really an abduction, therefore the insurance company doesn't have to pay up. You keep quiet Bob
Widder, SASS #59054 Posted August 8, 2023 Author Posted August 8, 2023 51 minutes ago, Dirty Dan Dawkins said: Don’t laugh. It could happen to you! 49 minutes ago, Dirty Dan Dawkins said: Don’t laugh. It could happen to you. One of the characteristics of a 'Replicator' is that they repeat itself. ..........Widder
Jabez Cowboy,SASS # 50129 Posted August 8, 2023 Posted August 8, 2023 TW when ya is fully Grown ya can Shoot FCD... Jabez Cowboy
Imis Twohofon,SASS # 46646 Posted August 8, 2023 Posted August 8, 2023 One of the things about aliens is that one day they just "show up", kinda like TW Imis (who is sad because he has no basement)
Chantry Posted August 8, 2023 Posted August 8, 2023 12 hours ago, Tennessee williams said: The Zuqoliaks are a race of all female species. They look like real purty miniature Amazons. They are known to all that know them as being sex addicts. The last time they got to me, the bunkhouse boss was out of town for work. Them Zuqoliaks chained me in my basement and had their way with me multiple times. They'd do what they wanted and then leave for an hour an come back for more "experimentations" without leaving me so much as bread and water. After a couple days, I was able to break loose and made it to a phone to order a pizza and cold pepsi. I almost didn't make it back to the basement and chain myself up before they returned. It was a close call. When they finished up with me, they said they'd be back in a couple months or so. I've been hiding out from them in my pasture with a couple of high powered flashlights just in case they show up early. No more vodka for you!
Widder, SASS #59054 Posted August 8, 2023 Author Posted August 8, 2023 59 minutes ago, Chantry said: No more vodka for you! More like..... no more Nanner Splits from DQ. ..........Widder
Dirty Dan Dawkins Posted August 8, 2023 Posted August 8, 2023 11 hours ago, Widder, SASS #59054 said: One of the characteristics of a 'Replicator' is that they repeat itself. ..........Widder Don’t laugh. It could happen to you!
Cypress Sun Posted August 8, 2023 Posted August 8, 2023 49 minutes ago, Widder, SASS #59054 said: More like..... no more Nanner Splits from DQ. ..........Widder Lots of Milky Ways in the galaxy though.
Chantry Posted August 8, 2023 Posted August 8, 2023 1 hour ago, Widder, SASS #59054 said: More like..... no more Nanner Splits from DQ. ..........Widder I can't quite put my finger on it, but I'm glad the both of you are at least 12 hours away by car!
Tyrel Cody Posted August 8, 2023 Posted August 8, 2023 1 hour ago, Chantry said: I can't quite put my finger on it, but I'm glad the both of you are at least 12 hours away by car! It's cute that you think that's far enough away from Widder, Williams, and their aliens...
Tennessee williams Posted August 8, 2023 Posted August 8, 2023 2 hours ago, Cypress Sun said: Lots of Milky Ways in the galaxy though. Salted caramel milky ways are the best. Almost as good as a nanner split! I gotta say neither quite hold up to a Zuqoliak.
Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 Posted August 8, 2023 Posted August 8, 2023 16 hours ago, Dirty Dan Dawkins said: Don’t laugh. It could happen to you. Who’s laughing, I’m praying for it.
Michigan Slim Posted August 8, 2023 Posted August 8, 2023 1 hour ago, Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 said: Who’s laughing, I’m praying for it. I just started digging a basement!
Perro Del Diablo Posted August 8, 2023 Posted August 8, 2023 I want to know did his brain sucker die of starvation?
PowderRiverCowboy Posted August 8, 2023 Posted August 8, 2023 Somehow I think you been talking to Uranus a bit to much
Pickpocket Kate Posted August 8, 2023 Posted August 8, 2023 20 hours ago, Tennessee williams said: The Zuqoliaks are a race of all female species. They look like real purty miniature Amazons. They are known to all that know them as being sex addicts. The last time they got to me, the bunkhouse boss was out of town for work. Them Zuqoliaks chained me in my basement and had their way with me multiple times. They'd do what they wanted and then leave for an hour an come back for more "experimentations" without leaving me so much as bread and water. After a couple days, I was able to break loose and made it to a phone to order a pizza and cold pepsi. I almost didn't make it back to the basement and chain myself up before they returned. It was a close call. When they finished up with me, they said they'd be back in a couple months or so. I've been hiding out from them in my pasture with a couple of high powered flashlights just in case they show up early. Is there a male version of this race? Asking for a friend lol!
Cypress Sun Posted August 8, 2023 Posted August 8, 2023 22 minutes ago, Pickpocket Kate said: Is there a male version of this race? Asking for a friend lol! Yes.
Widder, SASS #59054 Posted August 8, 2023 Author Posted August 8, 2023 1 hour ago, Pickpocket Kate said: Is there a male version of this race? Asking for a friend lol! Yes indeed. They are called the Widderites. Their female population is call Widdermaniacs. ..........Widder
Tennessee williams Posted August 8, 2023 Posted August 8, 2023 2 hours ago, Pickpocket Kate said: Is there a male version of this race? Asking for a friend lol! Yes there is. They got hold of my cousin Linda Lou. But, instead of locking her in the basement and having their way with her, they kept her in the kitchen makin' samiches and fillin' up bowls of ice cream. Every now and then they'd let her out so she could do a load of laundry. Linda Lou got fed up one day and really laid into them. I mean she gave them the what for. Next thing you know, they packed up and said they had to go visit some kinfolk over to East Tennessee. Linda's been waiting for them to show back up cause she says she's got a bun in the oven. I don't know what kind of bread it is, but I'd stay away from it. She's gaining weight like crazy and won't wear shoes for nothing. They probably about ready to run her out of her mobile home park if she don't watch it.
Widder, SASS #59054 Posted August 9, 2023 Author Posted August 9, 2023 Well, you know the story about Linda Lou is a lie because ain't nobody kin to TW what knows how to operate an oven. Matter of fact, the safest place in TW's house to keep his money is in the oven and the bottom of the laundry basket..... P.S. - BUT, those fellers did show up over here in East TN before flying back home. True story..... a feller just can't make this stuff up. ..........Widder
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