Subdeacon Joe Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 The scandal unfolded after a church congregant unearthed comments made by Harrison in a recorded sermon over 10 years ago, Quote WEST HATTIESBURG, MS—Local Southern Baptist pastor Pete Harrison resigned in disgrace earlier this week after admitting that he doesn't like eating casseroles. The scandal unfolded after a church congregant unearthed comments made by Harrison in a recorded sermon over 10 years ago, in which Harrison said he preferred "something healthy like a nice garden salad" to "fatty, unhealthy casseroles." Dozens of angered church members stormed Harrison's home with pitchforks and torches hastily assembled out of the church's unused front pew, demanding answers. The pastor emerged, frightened and sheepish, and made a statement. "I apologize to all those I've hurt," he mumbled as several elderly church ladies began fashioning a Molotov cocktail to throw through his window. "It's clear to me now that I'm unfit for ministry. Please accept my resignation, and for the love of all that is holy, don't hurt me!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alpo Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 Casserole - Purina Baptist Chow Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cat Brules Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 Get a rope, dammit!! CB Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abilene Slim SASS 81783 Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 Read the article. It’s from the Babylon Bee... hysterical IMO. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Widder, SASS #59054 Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 If its a Southern Baptist church, he could lose his ministry license. His license could be restored if he stops preaching against dancing and moonshine. If he's Independent Baptist, he could get to keep his ministry license but must serve 2 years in a foreign missionary position..... somewhere in the S.Pacific like Hawaii. ..........Widder Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pat Riot Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 I’ll bet he dances when no one is watching... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
St. Louis Suomi SASS #31905 Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 OHHHHHH: I am going to warn my pastor so he does not make the same mistake. I have noticed he has a tendency to hit the pirogi pretty hard but not so much on the polish sausage and kraut - symptoms of maybe something deeper? STL Suomi Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marshal Hangtree Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 8 hours ago, Widder, SASS #59054 said: If he's Independent Baptist, he could get to keep his ministry license but must serve 2 years in a foreign missionary position..... somewhere in the S.Pacific like Hawaii. ..........Widder That could be interpreted two ways. I can think of worse positions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smuteye John SASS#24774 Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 2 hours ago, St. Louis Suomi SASS #31905 said: OHHHHHH: I am going to warn my pastor so he does not make the same mistake. I have noticed he has a tendency to hit the pirogi pretty hard but not so much on the polish sausage and kraut - symptoms of maybe something deeper? STL Suomi You do realize that''s there's probably not 3 people in West Hattiesburg that knows what a pirogi is, right? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Widder, SASS #59054 Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 1 hour ago, Marshal Hangtree said: That could be interpreted two ways. I can think of worse positions. Howdy Marshal. I was wondering if anyone would catch my usage of the word 'position'. You got it! ..........WIdder Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smoken D Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 Showed my pastor that some time ago. He assured me no problem in that area. At his size I agreed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marshal Hangtree Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 18 minutes ago, Widder, SASS #59054 said: Howdy Marshal. I was wondering if anyone would catch my usage of the word 'position'. You got it! ..........WIdder I believe we both must have sick minds, Widder. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Capt. James H. Callahan Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 Almost as bad, we had a pastor a few years ago who didn't like fried chicken. Great preacher, but not sure what planet he's from. JHC Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marshal Hangtree Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 Just now, Capt. James H. Callahan said: Almost as bad, we had a pastor a few years ago who didn't like fried chicken. Great preacher, but not sure what planet he's from. JHC How can you have Sunday dinner on the ground if you don't like fried chicken? Blasphemy, I tell you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marshal Hangtree Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 4 hours ago, St. Louis Suomi SASS #31905 said: OHHHHHH: I am going to warn my pastor so he does not make the same mistake. I have noticed he has a tendency to hit the pirogi pretty hard but not so much on the polish sausage and kraut - symptoms of maybe something deeper? STL Suomi Is that like a bong, or what? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cat Brules Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 13 hours ago, Abilene Slim SASS 81783 said: Read the article. It’s from the Babylon Bee... hysterical IMO. OF COURSE it’s a joke! Whadda you think we are?! Maroons? Embassy sells?! Cat Brules Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
St. Louis Suomi SASS #31905 Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 AIYEEEEEE!! A pirogi is a filled dumpling, usually fried in butter and onions. Filling can be fruit, cheese, or kraut. Think a ravioli, a kreplach, or a European version of a Asian pot sticker or sui mai. Think a wonderful little noodle like dough package around a great tasty surprise. My favorite is cheese/potato. STL Suomi Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smuteye John SASS#24774 Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 1 hour ago, St. Louis Suomi SASS #31905 said: AIYEEEEEE!! A pirogi is a filled dumpling, usually fried in butter and onions. Filling can be fruit, cheese, or kraut. Think a ravioli, a kreplach, or a European version of a Asian pot sticker or sui mai. Think a wonderful little noodle like dough package around a great tasty surprise. My favorite is cheese/potato. STL Suomi And are delicous! But are a Central European thing and there weren't a whole lot of Poles, Czechs and Austrians settling in West Hattiesburg, so it hasn't worked its' way into the local cuisine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cypress Sun Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 5 hours ago, Marshal Hangtree said: Is that like a bong, or what? If it was a bong, he'd be hitting the sausage and kraut and casseroles and fried chicken and fried chicken and fried chicken.....then he'd go back for seconds. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michigan Slim Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 7 minutes ago, Cypress Sun said: If it was a bong, he'd be hitting the sausage and kraut and casseroles and fried chicken and fried chicken and fried chicken.....then he'd go back for seconds. Exactly! And the chips! Where's the chips? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jonny Vero Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 My wife (who grew up in a Baptist home) likes to tell a story about her church and her Grandpa. The short of it is this: W, "Grandpa why don't Baptists dance?" Grandpa whispered, "They don't know how" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forty Rod SASS 3935 Posted March 13, 2020 Share Posted March 13, 2020 21 hours ago, Alpo said: Casserole - Purina Baptist Chow Mormons are fond of casseroles, too, along with lime Jell-O with shredded carrots and "funeral potatoes". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Subdeacon Joe Posted March 13, 2020 Author Share Posted March 13, 2020 12 hours ago, St. Louis Suomi SASS #31905 said: I have noticed he has a tendency to hit the pirogi pretty hard but not so much on the polish sausage and kraut - symptoms of maybe something deeper? Maybe IBS? Or an ulcer from having you in his congregation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Subdeacon Joe Posted March 13, 2020 Author Share Posted March 13, 2020 8 hours ago, Marshal Hangtree said: Is that like a bong, or what? OK, now I have a mental image of a guy trying to roll pirogi in Zig-Zags. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Badger Mountain Charlie SASS #43172 Posted March 13, 2020 Share Posted March 13, 2020 You guys better be careful or Birdgun will be in here yelling about a Baptist Category. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Birdgun Quail, SASS #63663 Posted March 13, 2020 Share Posted March 13, 2020 We Baptist believeth that all things should be combined together to make very hearty, meaty, and delicious cassaroles. That Pastor is found in the scriptures as weak (and we should pray for his strengthening). That pastor confessed he preferred herbs in the form of "a nice garden salad." Can't be having weak pastors. Or worse, weak Baptist Category shooters!!! Romans 14:2 (KJV) For one believeth that he may eat all things: another, who is weak, eateth herbs. We need to pray for all weak vegetarians. (Another one of my fractured scriptural misinterpretations.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smuteye John SASS#24774 Posted March 13, 2020 Share Posted March 13, 2020 2 hours ago, Badger Mountain Charlie SASS #43172 said: You guys better be careful or Birdgun will be in here yelling about a Baptist Category. Just remember that crossdraws are illegal in the Baptist category because Baptists don't dance. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Finagler 6853 Life Posted March 13, 2020 Share Posted March 13, 2020 On 3/12/2020 at 6:39 AM, St. Louis Suomi SASS #31905 said: OHHHHHH: I am going to warn my pastor so he does not make the same mistake. I have noticed he has a tendency to hit the pirogi pretty hard but not so much on the polish sausage and kraut - symptoms of maybe something deeper? STL Suomi They probably don't know what a pasty is either. A good Finn like does. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
St. Louis Suomi SASS #31905 Posted March 13, 2020 Share Posted March 13, 2020 56 minutes ago, Finagler 6853 Life said: They probably don't know what a pasty is either. A good Finn like does. Howdy: Ja sure I do! I love them - the UP misses me - I used to go to Menominee and we always got several at a little stand that was in a converted bus in a gravel pit. LOVED them - still do. OH get ready for St Urho's day. heinäsirkka, heinäsirkka, mene helvettiin :-) STL Suomi Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 Posted March 13, 2020 Share Posted March 13, 2020 1 hour ago, Finagler 6853 Life said: They probably don't know what a pasty is either. A good Finn like does. Pasty? Lots of them at Follies Bergére. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alpo Posted March 13, 2020 Share Posted March 13, 2020 Why would a Finn know about pastys? They come from Cornwall. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cypress Sun Posted March 14, 2020 Share Posted March 14, 2020 3 hours ago, Finagler 6853 Life said: They probably don't know what a pasty is either. A good Finn like does. I know what a pasty is. If you take them off like you would a bandaid, you better have more than singles. Just a heads up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Finagler 6853 Life Posted March 14, 2020 Share Posted March 14, 2020 15 hours ago, Alpo said: Why would a Finn know about pastys? They come from Cornwall. It's a yooper thing also. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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