Cheyenne Ranger, 48747L Posted September 9, 2021 Share Posted September 9, 2021 Being an elementary teacher in a former life I got asked by both students and parents at what school I matriculated (had to look up the spelling on that one) After 30 years I got bored and began to embellish during my last 5. My spiel went something like this: "I attended Conroe Normal Bible Institute. It's on (State Highway) 105 just a bit east of Conroe, TX, Good old CNBI; we were the Fighting Monks . . . our colors were celestial gold and white." Often conversations would end that point which was not a bad thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alpo Posted September 9, 2021 Share Posted September 9, 2021 Shouldn't that be CNBI? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pulp, SASS#28319 Posted September 9, 2021 Share Posted September 9, 2021 I tell them I attended UCLA. University of Cameron, Lawton Area. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hardpan Curmudgeon SASS #8967 Posted September 9, 2021 Share Posted September 9, 2021 Well... I used to regale folks with an account of the time I went on safari in search of the Elusive Great Horned Swamp Duck.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J-BAR #18287 Posted September 9, 2021 Share Posted September 9, 2021 My standard response to the question, “How ya doin’?” is “Too early to tell.” Regardless of the time of day. Most folks laugh. The expression on the faces of those who don’t laugh is priceless. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Four-Eyed Buck,SASS #14795 Posted September 10, 2021 Share Posted September 10, 2021 How are you elicits, "Better than some, worse than others". How old are you? "Twice as old as dirt", when I was in school we rode dinosaurs to get there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chickasaw Bill SASS #70001 Posted September 10, 2021 Share Posted September 10, 2021 up hill both ways CB Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062 Posted September 10, 2021 Share Posted September 10, 2021 . 47 minutes ago, Four-Eyed Buck,SASS #14795 said: How are you elicits, "Better than some, worse than others". How old are you? "Twice as old as dirt", when I was in school we rode dinosaurs to get there. 26 minutes ago, Chickasaw Bill SASS #70001 said: up hill both ways CB ............... backwards .... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sedalia Dave Posted September 10, 2021 Share Posted September 10, 2021 Tell them I graduated with honors from HKU Hard Knocks University. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062 Posted September 10, 2021 Share Posted September 10, 2021 ..... same state as UHK ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Injun Ryder, SASS #36201L Posted September 10, 2021 Share Posted September 10, 2021 40 minutes ago, Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062 said: ..... same state as UHK ? The northern hemisphere campus (you know, where everything is backwards to you southern hemispherers). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LawMan Mark, SASS #57095L Posted September 10, 2021 Share Posted September 10, 2021 When my Dad was asked what I would be when I got out of school, he'd reply "an old man". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474 Posted September 10, 2021 Share Posted September 10, 2021 How are ya doin' Kid? Upright and above ground! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alpo Posted September 10, 2021 Share Posted September 10, 2021 18 hours ago, Cheyenne Ranger, 48747L said: Being an elementary teacher in a former life I got asked by both students and parents at what school I matriculated (had to look up the spelling on that one) Maybe you should have also looked up the spelling of tale. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sixgun Sheridan Posted September 10, 2021 Share Posted September 10, 2021 "How's it goin'?" "Not sure which direction". "What's up?" "Ceiling fixtures". "What university did you attend?" "Whatsamatta U". "How are you today?" "Better than last Thursday, but not as good as Wednesday, and probably more like last Monday." People at work have learned to not bother me anymore with idle chit-chat... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cheyenne Ranger, 48747L Posted September 10, 2021 Author Share Posted September 10, 2021 22 hours ago, Alpo said: Shouldn't that be CNBI? fat fingers thanks for catching that cr Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cheyenne Ranger, 48747L Posted September 10, 2021 Author Share Posted September 10, 2021 5 hours ago, Alpo said: Maybe you should have also looked up the spelling of tale. well . . . cow feathers!!! so much for my prooof reading skillls Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Noz Posted September 11, 2021 Share Posted September 11, 2021 On 9/9/2021 at 7:30 PM, Chickasaw Bill SASS #70001 said: up hill both ways CB barefooted in the snow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blackwater 53393 Posted September 11, 2021 Share Posted September 11, 2021 People ask me how I’m doing and I often reply, “I’ve achieved two of the three major goals in my life!” Some will ask, “What are they?” To which I explain, “I have lived long enough to amaze my friends, I’ve lived long enough to really piss off my enemies, and I’ve almost lived long enough to spend my kid’s inheritance!!!” Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062 Posted September 11, 2021 Share Posted September 11, 2021 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forty Rod SASS 3935 Posted September 12, 2021 Share Posted September 12, 2021 On 9/10/2021 at 8:58 AM, Alpo said: Maybe you should have also looked up the spelling of tale. Beat me to it. One of the quirks that come from being an English major and long time school teacher. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alpo Posted September 12, 2021 Share Posted September 12, 2021 I like to tell people that Mama was scared by an editor when she was pregnant with me. And then, Daddy's CB handle was Nitpicker. So I come by it natural. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chickamauga Slim Posted September 12, 2021 Share Posted September 12, 2021 So when people ask, and they rarely do, I tell them I attended Whatsamatta U. where I was expelled. The Dean said I could redeem myself if I could prove I knew the difference between apathy & ignorance. On my way out the door I replied, " I don't know, and I don't care!". It worked out well though, I picked up a job at a prestigious law firm, Dewey, Cheatam, & Hough. It was short lived as my role there was to take out the trash, and apparently that did not include Mrs. Cheatam! I could go on, but like the leaky submarine I once commanded this just gets deeper by the minute. Which reminds me of my job at the watch factory putting second hands on digital watches.......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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