Jump to content
SASS Wire Forum

Lie down in the grass


Alpo

Recommended Posts

Does it affect you?

 

As a kid, for the longest time, I thought this happened to everybody. I would see people in the movies and on TV doing it, and I wondered why they put up with it. Decided you put up with a lot of stuff for a big paycheck.

 

Then about the time I was in high school I realize that it didn't seem to do that to other people. Maybe I was the only one :o.

 

Later I came to the conclusion that it was probably an allergy. When I cut the grass, even though I love the smell of fresh cut grass, the itty bitty grass pieces in the air make me sneeze and my nose runs and my eyes water.

 

But I have never asked anyone. Y'all should all feel special, because I'm asking you.

 

If you lay down in the grass, when you get up do you itch? As a child it was just on my back. I could lay on my belly and would not have any problem but if I laid on my back my back would be itching constantly. But as I got older it seems to have crawled all around my body. If I lay down in grass now, it does not seem to matter which part of my body is touching the grass - back, chest, belly, arms - I itch.

 

Anybody else? Or am I the only one?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I will admit, it's been a while since I laid down in the grass. First, because it itches!! But also because I would need help to get up.

 

Couple years ago I was outside at night and I stepped in one of the damn dog's damn holes. Didn't do myself any damage but landed flat on my back on the ground. I had to crawl to the clothesline pole, and then pull myself up the pole to  get back on my feet.

 

"I've fallen, and I can't get up!"

 

I understand that commercial a whole lot better nowadays. :P

Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

Every time I lay down in the grass these days, someone calls EMS.:P 

 

To answer the question, the only part of me that itches is whatever unclad portion of my body was touching the grass.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

13 minutes ago, Cypress Sun said:

To answer the question, the only part of me that itches is whatever unclad portion of my body was touching the grass.

You suppose it's just Florida grass that has the itches built into it? :D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just now, Alpo said:

You suppose it's just Florida grass that has the itches built into it? :D

 

I don't know. I do think that Bahia grass is itchier than St. Augustine grass though. No grass will make me itch as much as sawgrass though, it's almost like fiberglass.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Well we did have good old Pensacola Bahaia in the backyard when I was growing up. Then we had centipede for a while. I think it's mostly Saint Augustine now.

 

Y'all got wiregrass down there?

wiregrass082207a.jpg

 

It's rolling up 60 years since I was in Tampa, and for some reason they didn't allow me to go wandering in the woods at the ripe old age of 9. :huh:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

Oh yeah, still have wiregrass. You mainly see it in an ornamental use for subdivision entrances and residential landscaping though. I imagine that there is still some in the woods however...good luck finding some woods in Pinellas Co. Hillsboro and Pasco are going that way also. When I was a kid, I stayed in the woods most of the day.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

8 hours ago, Alpo said:

I will admit, it's been a while since I laid down in the grass. First, because it itches!! But also because I would need help to get up.

 

Couple years ago I was outside at night and I stepped in one of the damn dog's damn holes. Didn't do myself any damage but landed flat on my back on the ground. I had to crawl to the clothesline pole, and then pull myself up the pole to  get back on my feet.

 

"I've fallen, and I can't get up!"

 

I understand that commercial a whole lot better nowadays. :P

So you are saying you know your way around the pole, huh. LOL

 

TM

Link to comment
Share on other sites

As a kid growing up in northern California I couldn't mow the grass, much to the irritation of my father. Eyes swelled up and breathing was wheezy.laying down on it was very itchy. By the end of high school I grew out of it to a large degree.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

22 hours ago, Alpo said:

Does it affect you?

 

As a kid, for the longest time, I thought this happened to everybody. I would see people in the movies and on TV doing it, and I wondered why they put up with it. Decided you put up with a lot of stuff for a big paycheck.

 

Then about the time I was in high school I realize that it didn't seem to do that to other people. Maybe I was the only one :o.

 

Later I came to the conclusion that it was probably an allergy. When I cut the grass, even though I love the smell of fresh cut grass, the itty bitty grass pieces in the air make me sneeze and my nose runs and my eyes water.

 

But I have never asked anyone. Y'all should all feel special, because I'm asking you.

 

If you lay down in the grass, when you get up do you itch? As a child it was just on my back. I could lay on my belly and would not have any problem but if I laid on my back my back would be itching constantly. But as I got older it seems to have crawled all around my body. If I lay down in grass now, it does not seem to matter which part of my body is touching the grass - back, chest, belly, arms - I itch.

 

Anybody else? Or am I the only one?

It's just penance for some of the questions you ask.

kR

Link to comment
Share on other sites

When I was a young kid, 5th grade and before, we’d occasionally lay in the grass and watch the sky looking at clouds, planes and birds. Yes, it was itchy and once, I believe the last time, I literally got ants in my pants. 

My mom had a picture of me as a baby in a diaper sitting is grass with my arms raised and this look of “WTH is this stuff?”. I apparently didn’t like the grass touching me. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

5 hours ago, watab kid said:

i always worry that there will be dog poop in the grass - so many dont clean up after their pets , 

 

In Florida, you learn at an early age to look in the grass before you lay down. Not because of dog crap but because of fire ants.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

23 hours ago, Alpo said:

I will admit, it's been a while since I laid down in the grass. First, because it itches!! But also because I would need help to get up.

 

Couple years ago I was outside at night and I stepped in one of the damn dog's damn holes. Didn't do myself any damage but landed flat on my back on the ground. I had to crawl to the clothesline pole, and then pull myself up the pole to  get back on my feet.

 

"I've fallen, and I can't get up!"

 

I understand that commercial a whole lot better nowadays. :P

Get used to it.  I've earned a black belt in falling: I don't bounce anymore, but the last few times I haven't broken or seriously damaged any body parts.

 

You learn to spot very step in advance and your eyes never stop looking for hazards.

 

And the itching never stops, but I've learned to ignore it most of the time.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 hours ago, Cypress Sun said:

 

In Florida, you learn at an early age to look in the grass before you lay down. Not because of dog crap but because of fire ants.

Same in Texas.

 

TM

Link to comment
Share on other sites

19 hours ago, Subdeacon Joe said:

Not just you, not just Florida.   I see on television or in movies the young couple laying down in the grass and wondering how they can be comfortable with all the itching it will cause.

 

Amorous couple decided to lay in a field in either France or Belgium. They received nasty burns from Mustard Gas that was leaking out of an old WW I artillery shell.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Buddy Hackett. Well Buddy Hackett was just funny on television and in the movies, live he was filthy. Like Redd Foxx. He was much different than Fred Sanford.

 

I'm watching a Buddy Hackett routine recorded live in Vegas. And he found this school teacherish-looking woman in the audience and told her that when she got back home and she said that she had seen Buddy Hackett, her friends would want to know what stories he told. So he was going to tell her a couple of clean ones, so she could tell her friends.

 

The first one was about these two sisters - in their 60s - who owned a drugstore. This guy came in with - I don't remember what Buddy called it. It started with a P, possibly with a Pr. It was like the Viagra commercials - if you have an erection lasting more than 4 hours, see a doctor. This was before Viagra, but that was his problem so he went to the drugstore. Goes in with his trench coat wrapped around him. This little lady asked if she could help him. He said he would like to speak to a male druggist. She said that she had been a pharmacist for over 40 years, and there was nothing that he could tell her that she had not heard of before, so could she help him. He insisted that he would really rather talk to a male pharmacist. She told him that she and her sister own the drugstore, and there was no male pharmacist. So he opens his trench coat and says, "What can you give me for this?" She thought a minute, and then said, "How about $15,000 and half interest in a drugstore?"

 

Buddy asked her if she could tell her friends that joke, and she said she could. So he said how about this one.

 

This young couple, looking for a place to become amorous, were in a Revolutionary War cemetery (see folks, Alpo FINALLY got around to what the hell this has to do with laying in the grass). Back then the tombstone covered the entire top of the grave, to prevent grave robbing. And they enjoyed themselves on a convenient gravestone. The next day the young lady went to the doctor complaining of a sore back. He asked her to disrobe so he could examine her. Once she had he asked her how old she had said she was. She said, "23 Doctor, why?" And he replied, "Because on your ass it says you were born in 1736". But heBUDDY then asked the lady if she could tell her friends that joke - if she could say ass. And she said she could.

 

He told one more joke. I can't tell it here. It vulgarly referred to two gentlemen of exquisite grace having carnal knowledge of a deceased crocodilian on public transport.

 

The audience fell apart and she said she could not tell that joke to her friends.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

11 hours ago, Cypress Sun said:

 

In Florida, you learn at an early age to look in the grass before you lay down. Not because of dog crap but because of fire ants.

ok , that does get ones attention , im sure there are things like that everywhere now that you mention it , 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.