Jump to content
SASS Wire Forum

It's Almost Friday Humor Thread


Subdeacon Joe

Recommended Posts

5 hours ago, Subdeacon Joe said:

 

Alpo, I'm  going to ask you to do something that I know will be very difficult for you:  Ignore the minor differences in these two accounts.  They were written by different people, at different times, and meant to emphasize slightly different points.  The main points are the compassion and love Christ has for us, and the sharing of what we have and that by sharing, it is multiplied.

 

From the Holy Gospel according to St. Mark, chapter 8:

In those days the multitude being very great, and having nothing to eat, Jesus called his disciples unto him, and saith unto them,  I have compassion on the multitude, because they have now been with me three days, and have nothing to eat:  and if I send them away fasting to their own houses, they will faint by the way: for divers of them came from far.  And his disciples answered him, From whence can a man satisfy these men with bread here in the wilderness?  And he asked them, How many loaves have ye? And they said, Seven.  And he commanded the people to sit down on the ground: and he took the seven loaves, and gave thanks, and brake, and gave to his disciples to set before them; and they did set them before the people.  And they had a few small fishes: and he blessed, and commanded to set them also before them.  So they did eat, and were filled: and they took up of the broken meat that was left seven baskets.  And they that had eaten were about four thousand: and he sent them away.

 

From the 14th chapter of the Holy Gospel according to St. Matthew:
And when it was evening, his disciples came to him, saying, This is a desert place, and the time is now past; send the multitude away, that they may go into the villages, and buy themselves victuals.  But Jesus said unto them, They need not depart; give ye them to eat.  And they say unto him, We have here but five loaves, and two fishes.  He said, Bring them hither to me.  And he commanded the multitude to sit down on the grass, and took the five loaves, and the two fishes, and looking up to heaven, he blessed, and brake, and gave the loaves to his disciples, and the disciples to the multitude.  And they did all eat, and were filled: and they took up of the fragments that remained twelve baskets full.  And they that had eaten were about five thousand men, beside women and children.

 

So He was taking from what could be best described as His company mess and feeding everyone.  Note that it was multiplied, not diminished. 

Oh well. That's what happens when you rely on memory.

  • Haha 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

8 hours ago, Subdeacon Joe said:

 

Alpo, I'm  going to ask you to do something that I know will be very difficult for you:  Ignore the minor differences in these two accounts.  They were written by different people, at different times, and meant to emphasize slightly different points.  The main points are the compassion and love Christ has for us, and the sharing of what we have and that by sharing, it is multiplied.

 

From the Holy Gospel according to St. Mark, chapter 8:

In those days the multitude being very great, and having nothing to eat, Jesus called his disciples unto him, and saith unto them,  I have compassion on the multitude, because they have now been with me three days, and have nothing to eat:  and if I send them away fasting to their own houses, they will faint by the way: for divers of them came from far.  And his disciples answered him, From whence can a man satisfy these men with bread here in the wilderness?  And he asked them, How many loaves have ye? And they said, Seven.  And he commanded the people to sit down on the ground: and he took the seven loaves, and gave thanks, and brake, and gave to his disciples to set before them; and they did set them before the people.  And they had a few small fishes: and he blessed, and commanded to set them also before them.  So they did eat, and were filled: and they took up of the broken meat that was left seven baskets.  And they that had eaten were about four thousand: and he sent them away.

 

From the 14th chapter of the Holy Gospel according to St. Matthew:
And when it was evening, his disciples came to him, saying, This is a desert place, and the time is now past; send the multitude away, that they may go into the villages, and buy themselves victuals.  But Jesus said unto them, They need not depart; give ye them to eat.  And they say unto him, We have here but five loaves, and two fishes.  He said, Bring them hither to me.  And he commanded the multitude to sit down on the grass, and took the five loaves, and the two fishes, and looking up to heaven, he blessed, and brake, and gave the loaves to his disciples, and the disciples to the multitude.  And they did all eat, and were filled: and they took up of the fragments that remained twelve baskets full.  And they that had eaten were about five thousand men, beside women and children.

 

So He was taking from what could be best described as His company mess and feeding everyone.  Note that it was multiplied, not diminished. 

I actually find the same lesson in this bit of lore, 

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stone_Soup

  • Like 1
  • Thanks 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, John Kloehr said:

I actually find the same lesson in this bit of lore, 

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stone_Soup

 

I learned the version of Stone (or Nail) Soup of the beggar asking an old woman for water and the use of a pot so he can make soup using his magic stone and he will gladly share the soup with her.  She agrees with the provision that she gets to watch, as she sees no ingredients other than the stone. 

He builds his fire and hangs the pot over it and adds the stone to the soup and slowly stirs it.  After a bit he tastes it and mutters that it's getting there, but, gee, he wishes he had a bone to add for more richness, so the old lady goes and gets a bone to add to the soup.  Time goes by and the litany is repeated naming different items, all which the old woman supplies. 

Eventually he dishes up the soup, which the old woman proclaims to be the best she has ever tasted, and all made with just water and the stone.

 

Warmed by such praise, the beggar gives her the stone out of the goodness of his heart.

 

  • Like 2
  • Haha 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Mrs Rosy D'Souza was going to the market in Goa where she happened to meet Father Patrick.
Father: "I recognize you Rozy. I remember marrying you and your husband in Solapur when I was posted there".
"Yes Father" Says Rosy.
"How is your husband and the little ones ?"
"Husband is fine but so far, no children".
Father Patrick: "Don't worry, child. I'm going to Rome next week. I will light a candle for you there."
"Thank you, Father Patrick."
After some years, Father Patrick happens to meet Rosy again.
"So Rosy, how's everything and what about the little ones?"
"Yes Father. I have had three sets of twins and two singles. Total 8 kids".
"Where is your husband ?"
"Oh, he's gone to Rome to blow out that candle".
  • Haha 7
Link to comment
Share on other sites

7 minutes ago, Subdeacon Joe said:

No photo description available.

Assuming the story is true, the fact the details are known suggests they did not get away with it, the "youts" may have ended up paying for their prank. Still might have been worth it.

  • Like 2
  • Haha 3
  • Sad 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

7 minutes ago, John Kloehr said:

Assuming the story is true, the fact the details are known suggests they did not get away with it, the "youts" may have ended up paying for their prank. Still might have been worth it.

 

Yep.  Obvious they got caught.  Still a good prank.

  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

And just as things were starting to get better:

Screenshot-20230310-001618-Instagram.jpg

  • Sad 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 4/8/2023 at 10:08 AM, John Kloehr said:

Assuming the story is true, the fact the details are known suggests they did not get away with it, the "youts" may have ended up paying for their prank. Still might have been worth it.

 

On 4/8/2023 at 10:17 AM, Subdeacon Joe said:

 

Yep.  Obvious they got caught.  Still a good prank.

 

They likely got caught because they posted their antics on Social Media.

  • Like 2
  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Star Trek: PICARD.    S3:E4

 

Jean Luc is talking to the son he never knew he had, Jack Crusher, in a holodeck ten-forward.  He says “ask me about myself.”

 

23 year old Jack says, “The hair, when did you lose the hair?”

 

”Enjoy it while you can.”
 

 

  • Haha 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.