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Friday Humor - jump in and add some


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The Church and the Saloon. In a small mid-western conservative town, a saloon owner started construction on a new building to open up his business. The local Baptist church started a campaign to bl

Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl."  The priest asks, "Is that you, little Joey Pagano?"  "Yes, Father, it is."  "And who was the girl you were with?"  "I ca

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21 minutes ago, Sedalia Dave said:

 

May be an image of text that says 'THREE HORRIBLE FACTS: 1. Today is not Friday 2. Tomorrow is not Friday 3. Even the day after Tomorrow is not Friday 81'

 

But the day after that is Thursday, and that is getting closer to Friday. At least this did not start with Sunday, that would add yet another day.

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6 hours ago, Pat Riot, SASS #13748 said:

image.thumb.jpeg.85187b5d8949a12f7d97712fc30df60a.jpeg

Yet another case of why we need a boo/hiss button on this forum. Sometimes the "haha" emoji is not quite right.

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3 hours ago, John Kloehr said:

Yet another case of why we need a boo/hiss button on this forum. Sometimes the "haha" emoji is not quite right.

Hey, I have an idea. You can scroll. Scroll right on by...:P

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Basic training, and the squad is on bivouac. Several of them are from New York, and they're sitting around reminiscing about the good food you can get from a deli, and their favorite deli, and their favorite deli dishes.

 

One of them is from back in the hills in Kentucky, and he sits listening for a while, then he speaks up.

 

"Fellers, I know what a bagel is. My daddy got a pack of them. But what kind of dawg is a lox?"

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On 2/23/2021 at 9:50 PM, Pat Riot, SASS #13748 said:

Hey, I have an idea. You can scroll. Scroll right on by...:P


But you need to read it before you decide whether to laugh or groan!

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15 hours ago, Pat Riot, SASS #13748 said:

image.jpeg.d8fdd4c74170bd7d80cf6157815d23fb.jpeg

Maybe, if we could convince ANTIFA"s and other groups it is a secret decoder ring!         GW

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15 hours ago, Pat Riot, SASS #13748 said:

image.jpeg.d8fdd4c74170bd7d80cf6157815d23fb.jpeg

 

16 minutes ago, G W Wade said:

Maybe, if we could convince ANTIFA"s and other groups it is a secret decoder ring!         GW

 

 .............. but it only works on mains power .....   ;)

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2 minutes ago, Pat Riot, SASS #13748 said:

These are for Doc :D

 

image.jpeg.29bff1f990c5fb5bd4324b2523180850.jpeg

 

image.jpeg.b3c00ba3559a5304de5076d54448ade8.jpeg
 

image.jpeg.65022120c450b1ca7522ebbb84dfbdac.jpeg

 

Well, I have to say thank you for the effort!

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If you are relying on John Denver --- Rocky Mountain High, Colorado --- you still don't know where they're at.

 

560px-RockyMountains-Range.svg.png

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A Scottish Golf Story


John, who lived in the north of England, decided to go golfing in Scotland with his buddy, Shawn. They loaded up John's minivan and headed north. After driving for a few hours, they got caught in a terrible blizzard. So they pulled into a nearby farm and asked the attractive lady who answered the door if they could spend the night.

‘I realize it's terrible weather out there and I have this huge house all to myself, but I'm recently widowed,' she explained, 'and I'm afraid the neighbors will talk if I let you stay in my house.'

'Don't worry,' John said. 'We'll be happy to sleep in the barn And if the weather breaks, we'll be gone at first light.'

The lady agreed, and the two men found their way to the barn and settled in for the night.

Come morning, the weather had cleared, and they got on their way. They enjoyed a great weekend of golf. But about nine months later, John got an unexpected letter from an attorney. It took him a few minutes to figure it out, but he finally determined that it was from the attorney of that attractive widow he had met on the golf weekend.

He dropped in on his friend Shawn and asked, "Shawn, do you remember that good-looking widow from the farm we stayed at on our golf holiday in Scotland about 9 months ago?”

‘Yes, I do,' said Shawn. 'Did you, er, happen to get up in the middle of the night, go up to the house and pay her a visit?'

'Well, um, yes!,' Shawn said, a little embarrassed about being found out, and nervous about the timing, 'I have to admit that I did.'

'And did you happen to give her my name instead of telling her your name?'

Shawn's face turned beet red and he said, 'Yeah, look, I'm sorry, buddy I'm afraid I did. Why do you ask?'

‘She just died and left me everything.'

 

Edited by DocWard
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I'm a bit ticked off at the moment. My kid was at the doc's office for a routine visit and the doc asked if there where any guns in the family.

 

Yup, Dad has guns. Besides being an invasion of privacy, I don't even live in the same state!

 

Now I keep getting phone calls from the doc asking where to get ammo!

 

On edit: Just stole this from my lady :lol:

Edited by John Kloehr
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