Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474 Posted May 24, 2023 Share Posted May 24, 2023 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 Posted May 24, 2023 Share Posted May 24, 2023 Boudreaux and Thibodeaux were taking a trip to Baton Rouge. On their way they saw a sign that said Baton Rouge Left. So Boudreaux and Thibodeaux went home. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 Posted May 24, 2023 Share Posted May 24, 2023 This is an oldie…. The Iranian Ambassador to the UN had just finished giving a speech and walked out into the lobby of the convention center where he was introduced to a U.S. Marine General. As they talked the Iranian said, "I have just one question about what i have seen in America." The General said, "well anything i can do to help" The Iranian whispered, "my son watches this show called Star Trek and in it there is Kirk who is American, Chekhov who is Russian, Scotty who is Scottish, Uhura who is black, and Sulu who is japanese, but there are no Muslims. My son is very upset and doesn't understand why there aren't any Iranians, Iraqis, Afghans, Egyptians, Palestinians, Saudis, Syrians, or Pakistanis on Star Trek. The General laughed, leaned toward the Iranian Ambassador and whispered in his ear, "That's because it takes place in the future...." 2 1 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Subdeacon Joe Posted May 24, 2023 Author Share Posted May 24, 2023 Guy sends a text to his wife, "I just tripped over your bra that was on the floor in the bedroom!" She sent back, "It was a boobie trap!" 1 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeaconKC Posted May 24, 2023 Share Posted May 24, 2023 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474 Posted May 24, 2023 Share Posted May 24, 2023 2 1 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sassnetguy50 Posted May 25, 2023 Share Posted May 25, 2023 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474 Posted May 25, 2023 Share Posted May 25, 2023 2 1 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bad Bascomb, SASS # 47,494 Posted May 25, 2023 Share Posted May 25, 2023 1 3 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Subdeacon Joe Posted May 25, 2023 Author Share Posted May 25, 2023 He had a Goodyear, but now looks tired 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eyesa Horg Posted May 25, 2023 Share Posted May 25, 2023 Don't tread on me 1 1 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474 Posted May 25, 2023 Share Posted May 25, 2023 1 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John Kloehr Posted May 25, 2023 Share Posted May 25, 2023 12 hours ago, Bad Bascomb, SASS # 47,494 said: Once had an attic fan not working when I bought a house. After a close inspection, it was not as bad as this picture, but it was not wired into the house electric system. 1 3 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeaconKC Posted May 25, 2023 Share Posted May 25, 2023 4 3 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alpo Posted May 25, 2023 Share Posted May 25, 2023 Absolutely. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dungannon Gunner Posted May 25, 2023 Share Posted May 25, 2023 1 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474 Posted May 26, 2023 Share Posted May 26, 2023 1 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alpo Posted May 26, 2023 Share Posted May 26, 2023 1 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forty Rod SASS 3935 Posted May 26, 2023 Share Posted May 26, 2023 18 hours ago, DeaconKC said: All are right but #7. Boxes are now designed to be too big for the shelves in my pantry, are marked Family Size, and cost as much as a breakfast in a restaurant. There should be a #13: stores deliberately put things too high or too low for us to reach. I had a lady help me get something too high for me to reach. She was five inches shorter than I am but she picked up her five year old son and said "Larry, get the box down for the nice man." I could have kissed them both. 6 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alpo Posted May 26, 2023 Share Posted May 26, 2023 One of the advantages of being old. People help you. In the grocery store, stuff is either on the top shelf where I can't reach it, or it's on the bottom shelf where if I get down to get it I can't get back up off the floor. And I have stopped random people and asked them to help, and they invariably will stand up on their tippy toes or get down and crawl on their hands and knees to get me what I'm asking for. And I firmly believe that if I was 25 and asked the same question they'd give me a dirty look and go on with what they were doing. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Subdeacon Joe Posted May 26, 2023 Author Share Posted May 26, 2023 1 hour ago, Forty Rod SASS 3935 said: All are right but #7. Boxes are now designed to be too big for the shelves in my pantry, are marked Family Size, and cost as much as a breakfast in a restaurant. There should be a #13: stores deliberately put things too high or too low for us to reach. I had a lady help me get something too high for me to reach. She was five inches shorter than I am but she picked up her five year old son and said "Larry, get the box down for the nice man." I could have kissed them both. One day a lady about 4' 12" asked me to get something from the top shelf for her, then I asked her to get something from the bottom shelf for me since she was a lot closer to it than I was. We teamed up again a few aisles over. 1 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Subdeacon Joe Posted May 26, 2023 Author Share Posted May 26, 2023 https://www.facebook.com/reel/194672763479040?mibextid=9drbnH&s=yWDuG2&fs=e 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alpo Posted May 26, 2023 Share Posted May 26, 2023 "Whatever you decide, I'll do it." Okie dokie. Go find that pickup truck and pull him over and write him up for careless driving. I know how he feels. I got pulled over one night. Cop wanted to know how much I had to drink. I told him I didn't drink - I hadn't had nothing. He said "I've been following you for a mile and you keep swerving across the center line." I pointed down the road and told him that I had been trying to pass that motorhome for at least 3 miles, and every time I eased across the line to see around him, there'd be a car coming so I'd have to come back in my lane. Dang razzle-snazzle driving 40 in a 55. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 Posted May 26, 2023 Share Posted May 26, 2023 A young couple moves into a new neighborhood. The next morning while they are eating breakfast, the young woman sees her neighbor hanging the wash outside. "That laundry is not very clean; she doesn't know how to wash correctly. Perhaps she needs better laundry soap." Her husband looks on, remaining silent. Every time her neighbor hangs her wash to dry, the young woman makes the same comments. A month later, the woman is surprised to see a nice clean wash on the line and says to her husband: "Look, she's finally learned how to wash correctly. I wonder who taught her this?" The husband replies, "I got up early this morning and cleaned our windows." And so it is with life... What we see when watching others depends on the clarity of the window through which we look. 5 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Subdeacon Joe Posted May 26, 2023 Author Share Posted May 26, 2023 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474 Posted May 26, 2023 Share Posted May 26, 2023 And it's Monday as well! 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crooked River Pete, SASS 43485 Posted May 26, 2023 Share Posted May 26, 2023 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest BigBelle Posted May 27, 2023 Share Posted May 27, 2023 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest BigBelle Posted May 27, 2023 Share Posted May 27, 2023 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest BigBelle Posted May 27, 2023 Share Posted May 27, 2023 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 Posted May 27, 2023 Share Posted May 27, 2023 It bwas only discovered after take off, when the flight attendants started going through their preparations for the meals. So, the airline had bungled, and the crew was in a fix. However, one smart flight attendant had an idea. A couple of hours into the flight she nervously announced, 'Ladies and gentleman; we don't know how this happened, but we have over 400 people on board, but only 200 dinners. Anyone who is kind enough to give up their meal to someone else, will receive unlimited free liquor for the duration of the flight!' Her next announcement came six hours later. 'Ladies and gentlemen, if anyone wants to change their mind, we still have 180 dinners available'. Moral of the story: People who like to drink, have very kind hearts 2 1 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeaconKC Posted May 27, 2023 Share Posted May 27, 2023 Two psychiatrists run into each other one morning. In unison they look at one another and say "You're okay, how am I?" 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Subdeacon Joe Posted May 27, 2023 Author Share Posted May 27, 2023 https://www.facebook.com/reel/183673954212891?mibextid=9drbnH&s=yWDuG2&fs=e 3 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeaconKC Posted May 27, 2023 Share Posted May 27, 2023 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 Posted May 27, 2023 Share Posted May 27, 2023 2 hours ago, Subdeacon Joe said: https://www.facebook.com/reel/183673954212891?mibextid=9drbnH&s=yWDuG2&fs=e Did t wait for any action I if there was any 1 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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