Alpo Posted March 19 Share Posted March 19 2 4 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bad Bascomb, SASS # 47,494 Posted March 19 Share Posted March 19 5 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474 Posted March 20 Share Posted March 20 2 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Capt. R. Hugh Kidnme Posted March 20 Share Posted March 20 1 hour ago, Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474 said: INCOMING !!!! 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alpo Posted March 20 Share Posted March 20 4 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Father Kit Cool Gun Garth Posted March 20 Share Posted March 20 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474 Posted March 20 Share Posted March 20 3 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alpo Posted March 20 Share Posted March 20 1 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Father Kit Cool Gun Garth Posted March 20 Share Posted March 20 3 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alpo Posted March 20 Share Posted March 20 That is my last Engrish picture. I hope y'all enjoyed them. 2 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Subdeacon Joe Posted March 21 Author Share Posted March 21 1 2 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Father Kit Cool Gun Garth Posted March 21 Share Posted March 21 1 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alpo Posted March 21 Share Posted March 21 2 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 Posted March 21 Share Posted March 21 During the Christmas season… Fred and Gladys, lifelong admirers of the great Russian revolution, decided to go to Moscow to celebrate their Golden Wedding anniversary. Winter was coming in and they felt a few drops hit them lightly as they walked hand in hand across Red Square. “Ah, snow.” said Gladys. “No,” said Fred, “I’m sure it’s only rain.” “Snow.” insisted Gladys. “It’s just melting as soon as it hits the pavement.” “Ah. it’s our anniversary; we shouldn’t be arguing.” said Fred. “Let’s ask a local what they think.” So, together, they approached a man wearing a large, furry Russian hat and, in their best Russian accents asked “Excuse me sir, This is our first visit to your wonderful city. Would you please tell us if it’s raining or snowing?” The man smiled indulgently at them. “Good morning - and welcome to Moscow. My name is Rudolph and I am indeed a Muscovite. And I can confidently tell you that it is indeed raining.” They thanked him and went on their way. Out of earshot Fred turned to ‘Gladys. “Well I’m afraid you’ll have to concede this time…. …. ….. … …. …. Rudoph the Red knows rain, dear!” 5 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474 Posted March 21 Share Posted March 21 1 1 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Subdeacon Joe Posted March 21 Author Share Posted March 21 https://www.instagram.com/reel/C4qOzzXrEsp/?igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA== 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Subdeacon Joe Posted March 21 Author Share Posted March 21 Brilliant life hack! https://www.instagram.com/reel/C3_Bk9mPD-y/?igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA== 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Father Kit Cool Gun Garth Posted March 21 Share Posted March 21 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alpo Posted March 21 Share Posted March 21 4 1 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Subdeacon Joe Posted March 21 Author Share Posted March 21 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Father Kit Cool Gun Garth Posted March 21 Share Posted March 21 1 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alpo Posted March 22 Share Posted March 22 3 2 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sgt. C.J. Sabre, SASS #46770 Posted March 22 Share Posted March 22 45 minutes ago, Alpo said: Some of them would need to download one first. 6 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474 Posted March 22 Share Posted March 22 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 Posted March 22 Share Posted March 22 Stolen from the internet…. My dad tells a story about an acquaintance of his, an elderly woman living in New York. Her dog died. She called the pound and learned there would be a fee if they had to come to her apartment to pick up the dog for disposal, but they would cremate it for free if she brought the body to them. So she put the dog in an old suitcase and took the subway to the dog pound. As she started to climb the stairs with her suitcase, a nice young man opined that her suitcase looked heavy and offered to carry the suitcase up the stairs and then he walked away. He stole the suitcase. 4 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474 Posted March 22 Share Posted March 22 1 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alpo Posted March 22 Share Posted March 22 The stolen suitcase story reminded me. Woman said that during one of the frequent New York garbage strikes, she would take her trash and put it in shopping bags and leave it on the seat of her unlocked car. It was always gone by the next day. In Mad Magazine one time there was a strip about a woman taking the garbage out. She dumped the trash can into a Bloomberg's shopping bag, and was taking it out to the can at the street. And some kid came running by and snatched the bag out of her hand and kept going. She automatically was yelling STOP THIEF, when someone asked what he got, and she realized. "My garbage." 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 Posted March 22 Share Posted March 22 1 hour ago, Alpo said: The stolen suitcase story reminded me. Woman said that during one of the frequent New York garbage strikes, she would take her trash and put it in shopping bags and leave it on the seat of her unlocked car. It was always gone by the next day. I would do that with zucchini from my garden and leave the window open, but when I returned I would have a dozen more zucchini. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 Posted March 22 Share Posted March 22 An old man was eating in a truck stop when three rough-looking bikers walked in. As they passed the old man, the first biker pushed his cigarette into the old man's pie, then laughed and took a seat at the counter. The second biker picked up the old man's milk and spit into it. The third biker turned over the old man's plate before joining the others at the counter. Without saying a word to the laughing bikers, the old man put his money down, got up, and left the diner. One of the bikers said to the waitress, "Not much of a man, was he?" The waitress replied," Not much of a truck driver either. He just backed his big rig over three motorcycles! 2 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forty Rod SASS 3935 Posted March 22 Share Posted March 22 On 3/15/2024 at 6:43 PM, Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474 said: I'd buy one of those. I don't believe in vampires but just in case I'm wrong I want them to know I won't tolerate them for a second. 2 1 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forty Rod SASS 3935 Posted March 22 Share Posted March 22 On 3/16/2024 at 12:13 PM, Alpo said: On the one hand I agree with that last line. I'm not Irish. I don't celebrate St Paddy's Day. I also don't celebrate Cinco de Mayo because I'm not Mexican. On the other hand, St Paddy's Day is a religious holiday, not an Irish holiday. So get over yourself. And on the third hand, "you're not Irish so you can't relate to the problems of the Irish" is right up there with "it's a black thing - you wouldn't understand". So take your racist "I'm better than you because I am this ethnicity" bull and shove it. Hooray...and thanks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Subdeacon Joe Posted March 22 Author Share Posted March 22 My brother-in-law was a lay minister, so when his sister wanted a small, casual wedding, she asked him to officiate. He had never performed a marriage ceremony before, so he decided to ask his pastor for advice. "My sister has asked me to marry her," he began, "and I'm not sure what to do." The minister answered, "Try telling her you just want to be friends." 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 Posted March 22 Share Posted March 22 Three bulls heard the rancher was bringing another bull onto the ranch. First Bull: "I've been here five years. I'm not giving this new bull any of my 100 cows." Second Bull: "I've been here three years and have earned my right to 50 cows. I'm keeping all my cows." Third Bull: "I've only been here a year, and so far, you guys have only let me have 10 cows. I may not be as big as you fellows, but I'm keeping all 10 of my cows." Just then an 18-wheeler pulls up in the pasture carrying the biggest bull they've ever seen. At 4,700 pounds, each step he takes strains the steel ramp. First Bull: "I think I can spare a few cows for our new friend." Second Bull: "I actually have too many cows to take care of. I can spare a few. I'm certainly not looking for an argument." They look over at the third bull and find him pawing the dirt, shaking his horns and snorting. First Bull: "Son, don't be foolish, let him have some of your cows and live to tell about it." Third Bull: "Hell, he can have all my cows. I'm just making sure he knows I'm a bull." 2 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Loophole LaRue, SASS #51438 Posted March 22 Share Posted March 22 6 hours ago, Alpo said: The stolen suitcase story reminded me. Woman said that during one of the frequent New York garbage strikes, she would take her trash and put it in shopping bags and leave it on the seat of her unlocked car. It was always gone by the next day. In Mad Magazine one time there was a strip about a woman taking the garbage out. She dumped the trash can into a Bloomberg's shopping bag, and was taking it out to the can at the street. And some kid came running by and snatched the bag out of her hand and kept going. She automatically was yelling STOP THIEF, when someone asked what he got, and she realized. "My garbage." Bloomberg was the mayor; the store with the shopping bags was Bloomingdale's. LL 1 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alpo Posted March 22 Share Posted March 22 Barney Miller episode. Housewife was bored with her life, so she decided to go play prostitute. Just once. See what it's like. Got busted. So she's trying to pay the fine so she can get home before her husband gets home from work. Barney's trying to explain to her that it doesn't work that way, but she's not listening. She keeps offering him credit cards. "Master Charge? Bank Americard? Bloomingdales? Come on, everybody takes Bloomingdales." 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.