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Posted

Measured line

Posted

The tarder I set here, the longer I get.

Way out, baby! 

Make my day.

Who died made you king?

Who's our daddy?

Go soak your head.

Don't do anything I wouldn't do.

 

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Posted

Whos on First?

Rochester!

 

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Posted

Make like a tree and leave.

Make like a sewer and get the **** out of here. 

Make like a bird and get the flock out of here.

If I'm lying,  I'm dying. 

 

Posted

Watch your Ps and Qs. (No idea what it means. )

Bingo!

Off your rocker. 

You can bet your life.

If the walls could talk.

I'll be a monkeys uncle. 

Seeing is believing. 

Lo and behold.

I wasn't born yesterday. 

Posted

Here's a couple definitions from a search, still speculation!!!

 

Bartenders would keep watch on the alcohol consumption of the patrons, keeping an eye on the “pints” and “quarts” that were consumed.

 

mind your manners," "mind your language," "be on your best behaviour," or "watch what you're doing."  

 

 

 

 

Posted

Smooth move Ex-lax.

(After a burp) Bring it up again and we'll vote on it. 

Better out than in. (Passing gas)

Your clutch is slipping.  (Slip showing)

Your barn door is open.  (Fly open)

Posted

“Put an egg in your shoe and BEAT IT!”

 

”Git ya’ some hat!” 
 

“Go tell your ma she wants ya’!”

 

”Hit the bricks!”

 

** all terms for go away/get lost**

Posted
2 hours ago, Kid Rich said:

Yer headlights are on.

kR

I still tell people that, after they've turned off the engine and get out of the car - "hey, your lights are on", and then I feel so damn stupid.

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Posted

Stop crying or I’ll give you something to cry about.

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Posted

Beam me up Scotty, there's no intelligent life on this planet. 

Half baked.

Get to a man's heart through his stomach. 

No **** Sherlock.

Battle of wits with an unarmed man.

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Posted
On 1/29/2025 at 5:41 PM, Warden Callaway said:

 

If eveyone else jumped off a cliff,  I suppose you'd want to too.

 

I used to use this under Listen to Your Mother when I did loss prevention sessions for clients. Just because someone else is doing (whatever stupid practice I was preaching against) isn’t a reason you should do it too. I’m sure your Mom told you: So if Johnny Jones wanted to jump over a cliff you’d do it too!

 

Seamus

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Posted

If the van's a rocking, don't bother knocking. 

See you later, alligator.  After while crocodile. 

Catch as catch can.

Close, but no cigar. 

Hold my beer and watch this. (Still in use)

I'm going to stomp a mud hole in your a**. 

That dowg's so ugly you should shave its butt and train it to walk in backwards. 

 

Posted
20 hours ago, Alpo said:

I still tell people that, after they've turned off the engine and get out of the car - "hey, your lights are on", and then I feel so damn stupid.

I was thinkin more along the lines of when yer at a wet t-shirt contest.

kR

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Posted (edited)

on the up and up

 

by and by

LS/MFT (an ad slogan for Lucky Strike cigarettes)

 

soft as a kitten's bottom

 

soft as a baby duck's bottom

 

reflexes like an alley cat

 

so busy being a good (insert a religion) that he / she doesn't have time to be a good person

 

vest buttons (referring to a dogs tits)

 

tiddly winks

 

sacred cow

 

cut him wide, deep, and frequentyl

 

happy go lucky

 

a red letter day

Edited by Forty Rod SASS 3935
Posted
27 minutes ago, Forty Rod SASS 3935 said:

LS/MFT (an ad slogan for Lucky Strike cigarettes)

Loose straps means floppy t*ts

Posted
3 hours ago, Kid Rich said:

I was thinkin more along the lines of when yer at a wet t-shirt contest.

kR

I remember that one as being "your puppy's nose is cold".

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Posted

Stink so bad it'd puke a buzzard off a gut wagon. 

Lord a mercy. 

Even a blind hog can find an acorn once in a while. 

She was so flat chested, she could put her bra on backwards and it'd fit better. 

Posted
On 2/1/2025 at 4:21 PM, Warden Callaway said:

Watch your Ps and Qs. (No idea what it means. )

It comes from the days of setting type by hand. One picks up letters from a type tray and places them into a galley, upside down and backwards. p, q, b, and d are quite similar. After printing the page the letters are put back into the box, typically by a less skilled worker, usually an apprentice. mistakes are made.

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Posted

When in doubt, run in circles and scream and shout.

When life give you lemons, make lemonade. 

Go for it.

Balls out.

Balls to the walls.   

 

 

Posted
50 minutes ago, Warden Callaway said:

Balls out. 

 

 

From centrifugal governors on early engines. An engine running at its fastest would have "balls out."

 

440px-Centrifugal_governor.png

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Posted

stinks like last Friday's fish

Faerless Farris Stinker Stations....usually in Idaho

smok and mirrors 

snake oil salesman

laudanum

Musterol

crazy as a sunburned scorpion

useless as:

     tits on a boar hog

     tits on a chicken

     a screen door on a submarine

P-38 can opener (aka a John Wayne)

looks like a seabag full of doorknobs

leisure suits

Posted

(After a gross burp.) Get any on you?

Taken with a grain of salt. 

An apple a day keeps the doctor away.

Over the top. 

The low down.  

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Posted
26 minutes ago, John Kloehr said:

"When pigs fly..."

 

But I'm sure with enough thrust, they fly just fine.

 

Flying Pig.jpg

Posted
4 hours ago, Alpo said:

 

Flying Pig.jpg

Feed 'em right and you can have a methane powered rocket.  Have you ever been around hogs?  They can generate a LOT of methane.

Posted

Keep your cooties off of me.

Fate worse than death.

Horse of a different color.

I'll be a monkeys uncle.

Prouder than a puppy with two dicks.

Beat him like a red headed step child.

Like a bat out of hell. 

Run like your hair was on fire and your a$$ was a catching. 

The iron is in the fire.

Strike while the iron is hot.

I'm only warming up.  

You got that right.

Uglier than a stripped a$$ed ape.

Looks like she was beat by an ugly stick.

I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole.

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Posted
On 1/27/2025 at 8:56 PM, Tooky Slim said:

Up Your Nose With a Rubber Hose

 

 

 

On 1/27/2025 at 10:29 PM, Alpo said:

Did anybody say that besides Vinnie Barbarino?

On “Happy Days “ Mrs C. once said that to Fonzy.

 

CJ

Posted
On 1/30/2025 at 10:27 AM, Rye Miles #13621 said:

My dad liked, “Son of a beer pitcher” 

Thanks, that reminded me of my Dad saying,

Son of a Sea Cook.
Apparently Sea Cooks didn’t need to be that skilled. Where else are you going to eat at sea?

  • Like 1

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