The Aussie Humour Thread

[Linn Keller, SASS 27332, BOLD 103]

On 5/3/2023 at 8:50 AM, Alpo said:

The sign is confusing.

 

Are they telling people that it is safe for them to swim because CROCODILES DON'T SWIM HERE.

 

Or are they telling the crocodiles to stay away - CROCODILES DON'T SWIM HERE

It's worse than that.

Just like Florida gators that sun themselves beside the roadway and post signs that say RUNNERS KEEP TO SIDE OF ROAD ...

... now these Australian crocs are making, and posting, signs!

[Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474]

[Alpo]

[Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062]

[Buckshot Bear]

22 hours ago, Cactus Jack Calder said:

In 1962 I began attending college in Hoboken, NJ across the Hudson River from NYC. I lived at home and road a commuter train into Hoboken 6 days a week to attend classes. To get from the train station to school I walked along about 6 blocks of docks.
 

During my time at school the Longshoremen’s Union went on strike and set up pickets. One day as I walked along the biggest man I’d ever seen pocked his index finger into my chest and asked, “Hey kid, what is the capital of Australia.” I responded, “Um, uh, Sidney? Melbourne?” He said, “No, it’s Canberra, and don’t you forget it.” Naturally I never have.

 

After that abrupt introduction he turned out to be a friendly guy. He explained that he had served in the US Navy aboard the USS Canberra, the only US Navy ship named after a foreign city. He then explained that the USS Canberra was actually not named for the city but for the HMSA Canberra, which had been sunk in naval action protecting the US invasion of the Island of Guadalcanal.

Of interest, possibly only to me, I later served in the US Navy aboard the USS Guadalcanal, LPH 7 from 1968 - 1970. Recently I looked up my old ship and found it has been scrapped.
 

CJ

 

 

 

That's a great anecdote Cactus Jack, thank you for sharing it. 

[Buckshot Bear]

A roving tinker in the '30's

[Abilene Slim SASS 81783]

9 hours ago, Alpo said:

They use infrared scopes in daylight?

[Rip Snorter]

Probably serving on the Dark Continent.

[Buckshot Bear]

9 minutes ago, Abilene Slim SASS 81783 said:

They use infrared scopes in daylight?

 

That photo is from the Korean War -

"A member of 3rd Battalion, the Royal Australian Regiment (3RAR), displays the Sniperscope which is attached to a .30 calibre Carbine. The scope is battery operated and the battery is carried in the pack on his back".

[Abilene Slim SASS 81783]

2 minutes ago, Buckshot Bear said:

 

That photo is from the Korean War -

"A member of 3rd Battalion, the Royal Australian Regiment (3RAR), displays the Sniperscope which is attached to a .30 calibre Carbine. The scope is battery operated and the battery is carried in the pack on his back".

Oh I know what it is, I’m just amused by the lack of the photographer’s effort in at least simulating a darker environment. 

[Buckshot Bear]

3 minutes ago, Abilene Slim SASS 81783 said:

Oh I know what it is, I’m just amused by the lack of the photographer’s effort in at least simulating a darker environment. 

 

The original is a touch darker -

 

[Buckshot Bear]

Are crumpets a thing in the USA?

 

[Buckshot Bear]

[Alpo]

1 hour ago, Buckshot Bear said:

Are crumpets a thing in the USA?

 

I've heard of them most of my life. I've also heard that what the British refer to as a crumpet, we call a biscuit.

 

But the things in that picture don't look like any biscuit I've ever seen. They actually look like a pancake when it's time to flip it over.

 

Based on that, I would say no, we don't have crumpets.

[Buckshot Bear]

47 minutes ago, Alpo said:

I've heard of them most of my life. I've also heard that what the British refer to as a crumpet, we call a biscuit.

 

But the things in that picture don't look like any biscuit I've ever seen. They actually look like a pancake when it's time to flip it over.

 

Based on that, I would say no, we don't have crumpets.

 

 

This is how we butter them and you can have them with just butter but most people use honey, jam or vegemite and the below packet is how they are bought.

 

 

 

[Alpo]

That picture of yours with the butter on it kind of looks like an English muffin.

 

 

[Buckshot Bear]

11 minutes ago, Alpo said:

That picture of yours with the butter on it kind of looks like an English muffin.

 

 

 

Muffins are completely different from crumpets.

 

https://www.acouplecooks.com/crumpet-vs-english-muffin/#:~:text=Size and shape%3A A crumpet,it's served cut in half.

[Brazos John]

1 hour ago, Buckshot Bear said:

 

 

This is how we butter them and you can have them with just butter but most people use honey, jam or vegemite and the below packet is how they are bought.

 

 

 

I would eat them!

Butter and strawberry jelly, for me!

I don't think I could find vegemite in Texas (at least I hope not!).  

[Rip Snorter]

Mom used to eat Vegex which I guess is similar to Marmite, and I'd guess Vegemite.  Salty black goo.  She ate it for health reasons, Iron, if I recall, which she tested low on.

Good Crumpets are excellent.  The story I heard was that they were "Downstairs" food in the UK made with a base of leftover mash and dough.  Should see if I can whip up a batch.  Have a recipe.

[Sedalia Dave]

In general...

 

Crumpets always use milk in the recipe. English Muffins do not.

 

Both English muffins and Crumpets are baked on a griddle. However, English muffins are grilled on both sides while Crumpets are only grilled on one side.

 

Think of a Crumpet as a small pancake only cooked on one side.

 

English Muffins are common in the US.

 

I've never seen a crumpet for sale in the US

Edited May 12, 2023 by Sedalia Dave

[Chickasaw Bill SASS #70001]

it sure ain't a catshead brisket 

 

  CB 

[Alpo]

26 minutes ago, Chickasaw Bill SASS #70001 said:

it sure ain't a catshead brisket 

 

  CB 

Tell otto that word is biscuit

[Chickasaw Bill SASS #70001]

OTTO , needs to die 

 

  I can misspell enough , without help 

 

  CB 

[Smuteye John SASS#24774]

36 minutes ago, Chickasaw Bill SASS #70001 said:

OTTO , needs to die 

 

  I can misspell enough , without help 

 

  CB 

 

[Buckshot Bear]

[John Kloehr]

OK, some Aussie gets some cred from me for this. But where is the radiator? And where are the rear tires? But still, cred worthy!

 

 

On edit: After fighting Otto multiple times, I forgot to include the picture! Now included.

 

On edited edit: Otto needs to die and "Restaurant In Peas!"

Edited May 13, 2023 by John Kloehr

[Buckshot Bear]

[Buckshot Bear]

Paul Hogan 

 

[Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062]

22 hours ago, Buckshot Bear said:

 

 

 

    ....................... Dad?   

[Buckshot Bear]

I don't remember these......maybe @Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062 being the old fart that he is does??

 

[Chickasaw Bill SASS #70001]

well that be UGLY 

 

  CB  

 

  a matchbox , with wheels 

[Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062]

1 hour ago, Buckshot Bear said:

I don't remember these......maybe @Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062 being the old fart that he is does??

 

 

Lightburn made washing machines and concrete mixers, ......... and, it would seem, a combination unit .......

 

 

I have neither seen nor heard of these vehicles ........ 

[Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474]

[Buckshot Bear]

2 minutes ago, Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062 said:

 

Lightburn made washing machines and concrete mixers, ......... and, it would seem, a combination unit .......

 

 

I have neither seen nor heard of these vehicles ........ 

 

Me either Wallaby, here's a Google result -

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zeta_(automobile)

[Alpo]

1 hour ago, Buckshot Bear said:

I don't remember these......maybe @Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062 being the old fart that he is does??

 

Gets great mileage. Went a thousand miles Non-Stop.

 

Probably stunk though. Didn't need to stop for gas, and I suppose they could have put food and water in it so the driver didn't need to stop to eat, but if he didn't stop to go to the toilet that car must have been a mess.