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Widder, SASS #59054

He's the biggest liar...but I'm a better Jokester

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Posted (edited)

True Story:

I now have a Son-in-Law.   He likes to shoot and hunt.

His groomsmen actually bought him a Ruger 5.56 American rifle as a wedding gift.

 

ANYHOW, when he returns from the honeymoon, I plan to take him back out on the farm to harvest

some mud turtles out of the neighbors pond.  The farmer hates those turtles and loves for us to test 

them for pain intolerance.

 

Anyhow, I plan to tell him to grab that new rifle and we will go up on the hillside and see if we can smack a few mudturtles

around.   Distance is about 100+ yards, depending upon which shade tree ya want to sit under.

 

MY PLAN:  I'm gonna find a fake turtle shell and put it on the far bank of the pond.   Under the shell will be a

goodly amount of Tannerite.   Enough to decimate the turtle shell.

He won't know its a fake turtle shell nor about the tannerite.

I'll be saying.......'WOW... what kinda bullets are you shooting in that rifle'?

 

TN Williams might be the biggest liar......... but I'm a better jokester...... :lol:

 

..........Widder

 

Edited by Widder, SASS #59054
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Be sure to film that if you can!   :D

 

  

I've been on the other side of that joke.  I grew up in Southern California.  When I was about 12 we visited my Aunt and Uncle's place in very rural Missouri.  One of my older cousins thought he would have fun with his "city cousin".  He told me to grab my pellet gun and he and I would go shootin down by the pond.  We got down there, and he says "hey check it out, a tree frog" and takes a shot into a tree by the pond.  Down comes the biggest bull frog I ever saw (that he had put up there just for the purpose).  He looks at it and says "oh, looks like a small one, the tree frogs get kinda big around here".  He kept a pretty straight face until I dragged my dad down to see the dead tree frog, then Duane lost it and couldn't stop laughing the whole way back to the house....

 

 

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Widder!!

 

 I can’t decide if you and TW would be the new Laurel and Hardy or the next Martin and Lewis!!

 

:lol:  :lol:  :lol:  :o

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2 hours ago, Blackwater 53393 said:

Widder!!

 

 I can’t decide if you and TW would be the new Laurel and Hardy or the next Martin and Lewis!!

 

:lol:  :lol:  :lol:  :o

 

Thanks.   Who is TW?  :lol::lol:

 

How bout..... Andy and Barney?

 

OR, I could be one of the Sesame Street characters and TW could be the 'Nanner Monster'.

 

..........Widder

 

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Statler and Waldorf?

;)

 

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needPics.gif

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1 hour ago, Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474 said:

needPics.gif

 

Are you CRAZY??

 

Them two, (Widder ‘n’ Tennessee Williams) is so ugly that little kids have nightmares after seein’ the two of ‘em together!! :o :lol:

 

 

Oh!!  You mean the turtle shell full of Tannerite!!

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I hope to get it on film.   I'm gonna have to recruit a couple fellers who can keep it quiet

and not arouse any suspicions. 

 

..........Widder

 

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57 minutes ago, Blackwater 53393 said:

 

Are you CRAZY??

 

Them two, (Widder ‘n’ Tennessee Williams) is so ugly that little kids have nightmares after seein’ the two of ‘em together!! :o :lol:

 

 

Oh!!  You mean the turtle shell full of Tannerite!!

Well yeah, the tannerite surprise, but short exposure to Widder and Tennessee might be useful as well.

The kids may have nightmares for a while, but it has to be done, if we want to toughen them young'ns up.

I know I wasn't ready for initial exposure to them at my age, so we should sort of vaccinate them while they're young.

What do ya think?

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Howdy Kid.

TN's middle name is 'Covid'.   As such, there ain't no vaccination available against him.

 

Blackwater knows him best....... their kin..... :o

Of course, to hear TN tell stories, you'd think he's kin to everybody in Nashville, especially some of those country singing stars.

 

..........Widder

 

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1 hour ago, Widder, SASS #59054 said:

Of course, to hear TN tell stories, you'd think he's kin to everybody in Nashville, especially some of those country singing stars.

 

You mean like Tennessee Ernie Ford?

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2 hours ago, Arizona Gunfighter said:

 

You mean like Tennessee Ernie Ford?

 

Yea, he's just one of them.

Others include Hank Williams and Hank jr.    

And of course, here TN tell, he's partly responsible for the success of his cousin Don Williams.

Where do you think the idea for the song "Good Ole Boys Like Me" came from?

 

AND..... a 1st cousin, twice removed is Little Jimmy Dickens.

 

..........Widder

 

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But just how big is his lair? And are there any turtles in in? :D

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He's been known to be a liar about his lair.   

And..... as for turtles, he says he's known a few 'snappers' in his life.  :lol:

 

..........Widder

 

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Add one thing. As the shell explodes, blow an air horn behind him. You do know CPR, no? :wacko:

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14 hours ago, Blackwater 53393 said:

 

Are you CRAZY??

 

Them two, (Widder ‘n’ Tennessee Williams) is so ugly that little kids have nightmares after seein’ the two of ‘em together!! :o :lol:

 

 

Oh!!  You mean the turtle shell full of Tannerite!!

I hear tale a freight train turned around and rain away.

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48 minutes ago, Perro Del Diablo said:

I hear tale a freight train turned around and rain away.

 

Nah! Didn’t turn around, but it DID take a dirt road!! :o  :lol:

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On 7/8/2020 at 2:29 PM, Blackwater 53393 said:

Widder!!

 

 I can’t decide if you and TW would be the new Laurel and Hardy or the next Martin and Lewis!!

 

:lol:  :lol:  :lol:  :o

I'm voting for Laurel and Hardy. :lol:

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Widder, you need to keep in mind that this young man will be the father of your grandchildren.  Just sayin'

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7 hours ago, MizPete said:

Widder, you need to keep in mind that this young man will be the father of your grandchildren.  Just sayin'

 

I know.   BUT, I want him to also realize that if he ever harms my little girl, HE becomes the turtle!

:o

 

..........Widder

 

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