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Ba-Dump Tissssh - Memes

Pat Riot

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18 minutes ago, Buckshot Bob said:



You obviously don't travel much in Florida.


The red lane shown is for retirees, New Yorkers and Canadians that have their cruise control set at whatever the speed limit is.

The yellow lane shown is for the same group only their cruise control is set at 1 mph lower than the speed limit.

The green lane shown is the passing lane in most instances.

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48 minutes ago, Alpo said:

meme cat Xmas.png


One year, the Year of the Perfect Tree, we got to the tree farm in two vehicles, I got there first in my pickup, my wife drove my ex and arrived about 2 minutes later.  She walked up to me and said, "I found the perfect tree!"  Mind, we hadn't even explored the trees, she saw it as she drove up.  She stood by it as I wandered to look over the others.  But she had "The Perfect Tree!"  And indeed it was.  About 10 feet, full, very symmetrical, gorgeous.  So we bought it.  Got it home, managed to get it into the stand.  We always let a tree "relax" a day before decorating it,  Half an hour later it fell over.  Got it back up, and it fell over again.  Put an eye-screw into the wall to tie it off.  It fell over.  
When it fell over at 0300, I got a quarter sheet of plywood, mounted the stand on it with carriage bolts, put 3 cinderblocks on it.  Tree didn't fall over again.

But LORDY!  was that tree gorgeous!

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At our old house, we used to get 16 foot+ trees! Put an eye hook in the ceiling beam. Used a rope block & tackle to lift it into a 5gal pail and filled with stones, then covered with a white sheet placed on the floor first. Replaced the rope with a red tie down strap so no way was it going to fall. After the season, unfolded the sheet, trimmed all the branches off onto the sheet and carried them outside along with the tree trunk. Minimal mess and it wasn't going to fall and destroy the living room! They were heavy buggers though! Had to trim the branches back to get into the corner and sometimes an arch so we could get by it and thru the door to the hall. All decorated with Harley ornaments and Elephant ornaments. Don't have the ambition anymore!!! The one time we had a huge tree here, I hadn't done the sky hook thing. Cats took it out in the middle of the night! We lost about a dozen irreplaceable ornaments. Now they all sit in boxes being essentially useless!

Edited by Eyesa Horg
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Christmas has about become a non-event at our house with parents gone and sons off and away.  We haven't bothered putting up a tree in years. 


When the boys were small,  the tradition was, we'd go out and find a cedar tree on the farm.  Boys picked it out. I would shoot it down. They would drag it in.  Several times the tree got too much and we'd pick out a smaller one.

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2 hours ago, Cypress Sun said:


I've got a secret solution to the cat and Christmas tree dilemma.:ph34r:

Mine solution isn't secret.  I don't put up a tree and I don't own a cat.  Problem solved!

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