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The Aussie Humour Thread


Buckshot Bear
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1 hour ago, Smuteye John SASS#24774 said:

Seriously, every Aussie I've ever met had some story about some critter like a drop bear, kangarilla rat, or black-crested emurilla bird that attacks humans at every opportunity.

 

It ain't like ya'll aren't already giving Africa a run for its' money on the 'everything here either has thorns, stings, is deadly poisonous or can swallow you whole' reputation. 

 

There's no need to make up stuff, too.

 

Don't forget Chopper Read 

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2 hours ago, Sedalia Dave said:


 But that is more fun. :P

Must be.

 

The guy that told me about kangarilla rats said that he pulled it on a bunch of American soldiers that he was training with.  He had 2 of them so convinced that they slept in shifts keeping "Kangarilla Rat watch" the whole time they were in the field.

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15 hours ago, Rip Snorter said:

If I didn't remember the back story, it would be funny!

I seem to remember that the parents, or Mother, were in jail for the disappearance of their child while camping, saying that a dingo had taken the child. Years later, the child's clothes were found in the bush near a dingo place. I think the charges were dropped. So, not a funny shirt.

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Dju ever hear about the Texan who visited Australia.

 

A Texan visits Australia

A Texan on a visit to Australia could not help, as Texans are reputed to do, bragging about how everything in his home state was bigger than anywhere else in the world. While walking along with a few of the locals he suddenly fell silent. His companions, concerned by his sudden change in behavior, ask him what was the mater. As he stared off into the bush, he replied, I’ve always maintained that Texas has the biggest of everything in the whole world. Pointing at a Kangaroo he said, but that is the biggest dang grasshopper I’ve ever seen.

 

:D CJ

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1 hour ago, Cactus Jack Calder said:

Dju ever hear about the Texan who visited Australia.

 

A Texan visits Australia

A Texan on a visit to Australia could not help, as Texans are reputed to do, bragging about how everything in his home state was bigger than anywhere else in the world. While walking along with a few of the locals he suddenly fell silent. His companions, concerned by his sudden change in behavior, ask him what was the mater. As he stared off into the bush, he replied, I’ve always maintained that Texas has the biggest of everything in the whole world. Pointing at a Kangaroo he said, but that is the biggest dang grasshopper I’ve ever seen.

 

:D CJ

 

 a Texan was bragging about his property ... ".... why, back home I could get on my favourite horse and ride on the one direction for three whole days and not get to the other side ... ". I said "Yeah, I had a horse like that too" ......   ;)

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7 hours ago, Cactus Jack Calder said:

As he stared off into the bush, he replied, I’ve always maintained that Texas has the biggest of everything in the whole world. Pointing at a Kangaroo he said, but that is the biggest dang grasshopper I’ve ever seen.

Should've gone to Montana.

 

grasshopper-uncropped.jpg.02017a41763493bf6e1f3bf67b8ca237.jpg

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3 hours ago, Buckshot Bear said:

When Aussie get bored and have time on their hands 1

 

Big-Banana.thumb.jpg.b53da04b9f9a7b06b231c800dd48e100.jpg

 

 

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Buckshot,

I know a bunch of us Yanks like your photos!

Thanks for showing us the folk-art pieces that y'all have down under. Texans have giant armadillos, roadrunners, and snake farms along the highways, so we're more alike, half a world away from each other, than the politicians would have us believe! 

Keep enjoying life!

Brazos John

 

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34 minutes ago, Brazos John said:

Buckshot,

I know a bunch of us Yanks like your photos!

Thanks for showing us the folk-art pieces that y'all have down under. Texans have giant armadillos, roadrunners, and snake farms along the highways, so we're more alike, half a world away from each other, than the politicians would have us believe! 

Keep enjoying life!

Brazos John

 

 

Thanks very much Brazos John, much appreciated.

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