Jump to content
SASS Wire Forum

Bacon Lovers Rejoice!

Subdeacon Joe

Recommended Posts

Study Shows Eating Bacon Will Make You Live Longer


Science has enriched the lives of bacon-lovers everywhere. A

study conducted by researchers at ETH Zurich has concluded that the high

levels of Vitamin B3 (known as niacin) in this meat could help you live


To test this, Energy Metabolism Professor

Michael Ristow fed roundworms a dose of niacin, discovering that they

lived one-tenth longer than those who went without. The vitamin is also

rich in the likes of Marmite, paprika, peanuts and sun-dried tomatoes.

This is surprisingly contrary to what scientiests believed, because the

standard assumption has been that niacin promotes the formation of "free

radicals," causing faster ageing.


antioxidant-rich diet has been contradicted by Ristow's findings, which

shows that niacin "tricks the body into believing that it is

exercising," perfect for any particularly lazy individual.

Next up will be testing the theory on mice, but for now allow me to personally thank science.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Bacon, Bacon, BACON! :D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ask the pig about this.

Now, now, Charlie. If God did not mean for us to eat pigs, why did He make them out of bacon, ham, and sausage?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Now if they would take out about half the salt and all the preservatives so i could eat it!

Yeah. There is that.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I have a family group picture of about 30 people taken in late August of 1950. I was two months old and mom was holding me. Everyone was slender except for two aunts that were a bit soft. I know what these people eat every day. And most of it in cast iron on a wood stove. None of it would be on a modern diet. Sure enough, one by one it killed them. Dad past away last year at a few days short of 95. He lived at home and cooked and took care of mom until a couple of days before he died. A few months before he died I was up to visit and he was just taking up supper. Two large pork stakes, fried potatoes, gravy, biscuits and green beans.


My diet plan is, if it was invented after 1940, spit it out!

Link to comment
Share on other sites


This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.