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The Church and the Saloon. In a small mid-western conservative town, a saloon owner started construction on a new building to open up his business. The local Baptist church started a campaign to bl

Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl."  The priest asks, "Is that you, little Joey Pagano?"  "Yes, Father, it is."  "And who was the girl you were with?"  "I ca

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What's worse than a fly landing on the piano? A mosquito on your organ!:blush:

 

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33 minutes ago, Badger Mountain Charlie SASS #43172 said:

Eating my bacon at breakfast this morning, I noticed two wide bands of fat surrounding a lean band in the middle, and wondered if the pig suffered from insulin resistance?

I think it suffered from being killed then butchered, but that’s just a guess on my part. :D

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23 minutes ago, Subdeacon Joe said:

Perfect meal for the submarine service. 

FB_IMG_1623528159262.jpg

Holy…….Smokes! That would be something a dipstick Swabbie Mess Cook would dream up, for sure. 
 

Oh, I’m sorry, “Mess Specialist”. They probably have some fancy rating name now. 
 

Yep…I was right. The food is probably even “better”…Ahem…now. 
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Culinary_specialist_(United_States_Navy)

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My wife is so funny at times. Once she asked me who won the race. I said it was Kyle Busch. She said yeah that's what I heard.

Another time I told her I put a quart of oil her car. She said why was it low? :huh:

Then back in the day when I told her I bought a Highwall Browning she asked if steel wool would

take out the browning.:lol:

 

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1 hour ago, Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062 said:

I'll try this test this evening, I have 4 "6pak"s in the fridge .......   ;)

 

Be sure to report on any potential side effects.

 

 

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Two old men were walking in the park one day when a frog jumped out in front of them and said "kiss me and I will turn into a beautiful princess!"

One old man picked up the frog and put in his coat pocket. The other senior exclaimed, "aren't you going to kiss it?"

The old man said no, "at my age I can have a lot more fun with a talking frog." :rolleyes:

 

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On 6/24/2021 at 1:35 AM, Pat Riot, SASS #13748 said:

Too many funny signs to copy and paste. Posted the link instead:

 

https://twistedsifter.com/2020/10/funny-covid-pandemic-signs-compilation/

 ...... why ?

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The old parish priest was getting upset about everyone coming into confession and confessing about adultery. He finally lost it, and made an ultimatum.

 

"The next time I hear the word adultery, I'm going to quit."

 

Not wanting him to quit, the parishioners got together and decided to use a different term. From now oo, when they were cconfessingto adultery, they would say they had fallen.

 

The old priest seemed acceptable with that, and things went along fine for about five more years, when he sickened and died.

 

After the new priest had been there for a week, he went to see the mayor. "We must do something about the streets. In confession everyone keeps telling me about how they're falling."

 

The mayor, realizing the new priest does not know of the local secret term, bursts out laughing.

 

But then, just as he was about to explain to the priest, the priest angrily said, "I don't see what you're laughing about. Your daughter has fallen twice already this week, and your wife three times!"

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