The Aussie Humour Thread

[Cactus Jack Calder]

When I was a mere child we had one of those toasters. I believe it had four sides to toast bread, but my memory may be faulty on that detail. The thing I remember most about that toaster is that during a visit by my mother’s parents the bread was burned. My Grandma said “Oh, that’s alright I’ll just scrape it off.” My Mother exasperated with the toaster ,or her Mother, said “No”, and flung the offending slice across the dining room into the kitchen sink. There was complete silence for several seconds, then Dad just reached over and put in another slice of bread as if nothing had happened. 
That made quite an impression on a 5 year old, me. My Mother was a loving and kind person. I really have no idea what set her off that day. 
Just goes to show, everyone can have a bad day once in a while.

 

CJ

 

While just living in the memory I hadn’t realized. That had to be 73 years ago. A memory as vivid as if it happened last week. 

Edited March 28, 2023 by Cactus Jack Calder
Thinking

[Abilene Slim SASS 81783]

7 minutes ago, Cactus Jack Calder said:

When I was a mere child we had one of those toasters. I believe it had four sides to toast bread, but my memory may be faulty on that detail. The thing I remember most about that toaster is that during a visit by my mother’s parents the bread was burned. My Grandma said “Oh, that’s alright I’ll just scrape it off.” My Mother exasperated with the toaster ,or her Mother, said “No”, and flung the offending slice across the dining room into the kitchen sink. There was complete silence for several seconds, then Dad just reached over and put in another slice of bread as if nothing had happened. 
That made quite an impression on a 5 year old, me. My Mother was a loving and kind person. I really have no idea what set her off that day. 
Just goes to show, everyone can have a bad day once in a while.

 

CJ

Yup, they made four slice models

[Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062]

18 hours ago, Buckshot Bear said:

Did you guys in the US have these knuckle burner toasters and ceramic kettles with Bakelite lids that the element used to blow with regularity when you were a kid?

 

 

15 hours ago, Abilene Slim SASS 81783 said:

Yup. Never seen a coffee make like that though. Our older electric makers were generally made of aluminum.

 

15 hours ago, Buckshot Bear said:

 

Here's a better photo of the type -

 

 

3 hours ago, Eyesa Horg said:

Never seen the coffee pot before, ours were stainless or aluminum percolators. I've seen the toasters, but never had the pleasure of using one.

 

Them's not coffee pots.

 Them's 'lectric jugs ; a ceramic vessel used to boil water, mostly for your teapot  ,  but also for "washing-up water.

   ........ if an Australian wanted coffee, you used the 'lectric jug to boil the water and added instant coffee to your cup.

( you know, the way God intended )

[Abilene Slim SASS 81783]

16 minutes ago, Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062 said:

 

 

 

 

Them's not coffee pots.

 Them's 'lectric jugs ; a ceramic vessel used to boil water, mostly for your teapot  ,  but also for "washing-up water.

   ........ if an Australian wanted coffee, you used the 'lectric jug to boil the water and added instant coffee to your cup.

( you know, the way God intended )

What’s tea? 

[Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062]

3 minutes ago, Abilene Slim SASS 81783 said:

What’s tea? 

 

 that stuff you guys flavoured Boston harbour with .... 

[Chickasaw Bill SASS #70001]

the colored water , ya add sugar to down south and ice 

 

  CB 

[Buckshot Bear]

[Buckshot Bear]

[Sedalia Dave]

6 hours ago, Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062 said:

instant coffee

 

Get A Rope.

 

 

 

 

[Sedalia Dave]

[Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062]

14 minutes ago, Sedalia Dave said:

 

      ........... now THAT'S an attention getter ........   

[Alpo]

That would actually be a fünfing (I'm sure there's no such word). A drilling has three barrels. The term comes from the German word for three - drei. That thing has five barrels, so it should be referred to by the German word for five -fünf.

 

 

I just went and looked it up. I was close. It is fünfling. Got an L in it. It means quintuplet.

Edited March 29, 2023 by Alpo

[Rip Snorter]

there are vierling with 4, never saw one with 5. before.

[Buckshot Bear]

7 hours ago, Sedalia Dave said:

 

Should have had an A and a L   

[Alpo]

That's what I first thought it said. Figured it was a joke, about Australians not being able to count past three.

 

Like saying that Mrs Jones had five babies - she had triplets. Oooookay.

[Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474]

But is it CAS legal?

 

Meanwhile, back in Australia:

[Buckshot Bear]

Some more 1930's tourist posters 

 

 

[Buckshot Bear]

[Buckshot Bear]

[Buckshot Bear]

[Buckshot Bear]

[Rip Snorter]

2 minutes ago, Buckshot Bear said:

Apparently not the jolly one!

[Buckshot Bear]

5 minutes ago, Rip Snorter said:

Apparently not the jolly one!

 

I think he must have been a bit stumped by the camera.

[Rip Snorter]

2 minutes ago, Buckshot Bear said:

 

I think he must have been a bit stumped by the camera.

But not truncated.

[Buckshot Bear]

Newnes was a town near Katoomba NSW, now a ghost town.

 

[Abilene Slim SASS 81783]

43 minutes ago, Buckshot Bear said:

Not knowing, I had to look up swagman and came up with this about waltzing Matilda. I learn something new every day!

 

Swagmen were particularly common in Australia during times of economic uncertainty, such as the 1890s and the Great Depression of the 1930s. Many unemployed men travelled the rural areas of Australia on foot, their few meagre possessions rolled up and carried in their swag. Their swag was frequently referred to as "Matilda", hence Waltzing Matilda refers to walking with their swag. 

[Alpo]

He doesn't quite fit the image I have of a swag man.

 

You got a hobo carrying everything he owns on his back. That's what I see when I hear the term.

 

That guy has got enough stuff that he would overload two mules.

[Buckshot Bear]

7 minutes ago, Alpo said:

He doesn't quite fit the image I have of a swag man.

 

You got a hobo carrying everything he owns on his back. That's what I see when I hear the term.

 

That guy has got enough stuff that he would overload two mules.

 

The swaggie looks like he might have been trying to start a business to me.

[Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062]

43 minutes ago, Alpo said:

He doesn't quite fit the image I have of a swag man.

 

You got a hobo carrying everything he owns on his back. That's what I see when I hear the term.

 

That guy has got enough stuff that he would overload two mules.

 

  ...... but Hobos travel around on trains (everybody knows that) .... Swagmen usually walk ......  

[DeaconKC]

Anybody else got Roger Miller's "King of the Road" running through their heads?

[Buckshot Bear]

Another 1930's tourist poster

 

[Buckshot Bear]

[Buckshot Bear]

 

 

[Buckshot Bear]

Photographical evidence of an Aussie bogan.

 

 

[Buckshot Bear]