Subdeacon Joe Posted January 28, 2020 Share Posted January 28, 2020 Your wife recently made the incredible claim that she was "fine" and that "nothing is wrong" when you asked her if everything is OK. Quote Official Babylon Bee fact-checkers say that you should apologize immediately for whatever it is you did. A foot rub or chocolates are appropriate acts of penance. You should also get better at communicating with her. She's your wife, bro. She also claimed that she was OK with "whatever you want" for dinner, and we rate this claim Four Pinocchios. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J-BAR #18287 Posted January 28, 2020 Share Posted January 28, 2020 Yep, bad JuJu there. Young husbands have to learn the hard way. Points do not carry over from previous days. Every morning when the husband wakes up, at best he is even and starting fresh. At worst, history happens. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Colorado Coffinmaker Posted January 28, 2020 Share Posted January 28, 2020 PLUS ONE too J-BAR and Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bgavin Posted January 28, 2020 Share Posted January 28, 2020 The kids are grown and gone, so I asked "What do you want for Christmas." She said, "The kids are gone now, you don't have to get me anything." Big mistake. Big, big, big mistake. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sixgun Sheridan Posted January 28, 2020 Share Posted January 28, 2020 12 hours ago, J-BAR #18287 said: Points do not carry over from previous days. Ain't that the truth. You can be Husband of the Year for three weeks straight, and the first boo-boo you make you're back to sleeping on the couch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cypress Sun Posted January 28, 2020 Share Posted January 28, 2020 And, why is it that when they say "That's all I have to say about it"...........it's NEVER all they have to say about it. Also, the words "Nevermind" and "Oh, nothing"........They are warnings. Run, hide, mow the yard or go to the store if you know what's good for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abilene Slim SASS 81783 Posted January 28, 2020 Share Posted January 28, 2020 13 hours ago, J-BAR #18287 said: Points do not carry over from previous days. Every morning when the husband wakes up, at best he is even and starting fresh. At worst, history happens. And sometimes you wake up already in trouble for something you did in one her dreams. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 Posted January 28, 2020 Share Posted January 28, 2020 Another way to say it: one aw shit cancels out 100 attaboys. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bgavin Posted January 28, 2020 Share Posted January 28, 2020 6 hours ago, Sixgun Sheridan said: Ain't that the truth. You can be Husband of the Year for three weeks straight, and the first boo-boo you make you're back to sleeping on the couch. Garage. Actually, to clarify... the garage was the only quiet place with a house full of kids and working graveyard shifts. My sweetie of 39 years is a rare one... she has never exiled me to the couch or the garage. I did step on my johnson by not "reading her mind" about the Christmas gift, but it was good natured ribbing only. I have gotten "that look" about something I did in her dreams... but even that winds up as something humorous... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cat Brules Posted January 29, 2020 Share Posted January 29, 2020 My wife woke up one morning and said she had a dream about me and one of my exgirlfriends (from before I even knew my wife), who was one of her old high school classmates. She rode my butt for two days about something that never happened, drawing out every detail. Me: “Why are you doing this? It was a dream!“. Her: “I know her and I know you! I know what you two were doing!” Hard to argue with that logic. Btw, my old gf had cast me aside for one of my friends, a university basketball player, and they were later married. After a couple of days, my wife just dropped it and, she never mentioned it again. ?????Who knows? Cat Brules Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cemetery Posted January 29, 2020 Share Posted January 29, 2020 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Subdeacon Joe Posted January 29, 2020 Author Share Posted January 29, 2020 39 minutes ago, Cat Brules said: My wife woke up one morning and said she had a dream about me and one of my exgirlfriends (from before I even knew my wife), who was one of her old high school classmates. She rode my butt for two days about something that never happened, drawing out every detail. Me: “Why are you doing this? It was a dream!“. Her: “I know her and I know you! I know what you two were doing!” Hard to argue with that logic. Btw, my old gf had cast me aside for one of my friends, a university basketball player, and they were later married. After a couple of days, my wife just dropped it and, she never mentioned it again. ?????Who knows? Cat Brules I was going to post this in the "Memes" thread, but THIS ^^^^^gives me the perfect place for it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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