Heard almost all of those, I had not heard "Tell me who your friends are and I'll tell you who you are" and I like that one.
Another one when things were going too slow was it's taking "40 forevers" or "a month of Sundays".
My Dad had one better than "I'll give you something to cry for", he said "I'll put a knot on your head so big you'll have to stand on a chair to rub it". Not all of his were bad though, he also said "If it's worth doing it's worth doing right" and "That ain't no hill for a stepper".
One final thing, not an odd saying but pretty funny. When I was little bitty my Grandmother would say "Well I declare!", it was a few years before I figured it out and stopped wondering who Ida Claire was.