Turkey Toss

[Subdeacon Joe]

 

 

 

[Eyesa Horg]

3 minutes ago, Subdeacon Joe said:

 

 

 

Well, now that's something completely different! At least they aren't frozen!

[Alpo]

A few of them birds apparently did not get the word. I saw one of them that they threw it off the roof and it turned around and flew back on the roof. I saw another one they threw off the roof and it flew off at an angle. So at least two of them turkeys could fly.

[Hardpan Curmudgeon SASS #8967]

"Oh, the Humanity...!!"    

[Cypress Sun]

I'm sure a couple of them kids got pretty clawed up. 

 

When I lived in my other house, wild turkeys abounded. Turkeys push the definition of flying though, more like semi-controlled crashing. Jump out of a tree and crash glide to the ground....or window....or screened in enclosure....or the side of your vehicle.

[Hardpan Curmudgeon SASS #8967]

1 hour ago, Cypress Sun said:

 

I'm sure a couple of them kids got pretty clawed up. 

 

 

'Bout the only thing that compete with a turkey flogging is a good goose flogging....  

[Eyesa Horg]

2 hours ago, Hardpan Curmudgeon SASS #8967 said:

 

'Bout the only thing that compete with a turkey flogging is a good goose flogging....  

Swans can be impressive as well, even if you're in a boat!

[Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474]

Ever see what a turkey can do, with it's spurs, to a dog?

They have miniature chainsaws on their feet.

At least the wild ones do!

[Subdeacon Joe]

https://sites.rootsweb.com/~okhcgs/pbturkeytoss.html

 

"

You could just feel the electricity in the air. All the stores were decorated with silver-sprayed tumbleweed Christmas trees festooned with multi-colored gourds. The kids were all waiting with bated breath for Santa to come down the street on a flat bed trailer pulled by a late model International Harvester tractor from Dixon's Implement Store.

Into the crowd he flung brown paper sacks filled with oranges, mushy apples and unshelled nuts stuck together with hard candy that'd melted in the heat. Santa stuffed his cuffs into tall black cowboy boots--as nobody knew where to find Santa-type boots--but the subtlety was lost on most of us."

 

"

These turkeys weighted about twenty to thirty pounds and their glide ratio was about a 1 x 2, meaning that for every foot they glide they fall two--about the same as a kitchen range. By noon the population of the town had exploded from 3,500 to about 10,000 people,all packed into a two- block area.

Many of these folks knew that if they were to have a turkey for Christmas dinner they had better get one today. Also, in that crowd, we had no shortages of Christmas gooses.

At one o'clock, the mayor climbed into the bed of a pickup truck, pulled out his handkerchief and after a long drum roll dropped the handkerchief. Live turkeys commenced peeling off the tops of the buildings, tossed over the edge by hidden merchants. New----comers to the turkey toss soon learned that a terrorized turkey will immediately lose control of all body orifices as soon as it sees the sea of hungry people straining toward it. The men on top of the buildings throwing the turkeys maintained that when a twenty five pound turkey glides into the crowd at a 45 degree angle, it usually takes out six to eight people depending on the glide angle and the weight of the bird; it kinda reminded some of them of bowling. Other guys remembered W W II Japanese kamikazes."