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The Aussie Humour Thread


Buckshot Bear

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3 hours ago, Buckshot Bear said:

These were on a lot of cars when I was young.

 

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Rocks from following too close on a gravel road, or low flying magpies?

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14 minutes ago, Alpo said:

Rocks from following too close on a gravel road, or low flying magpies?

 

Rocks from cars either in front, overtaking you or coming in the other direction.

You still see them occasionally, I suppose laminated front windscreens have made them more of a thing of the past and most insurance companies down here give you a replacement windscreen annually with your policy at no cost. 

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WOODCHOPPING - 1870
 
The sport of woodchop has its origins in 1870 in Tasmania, where legend has it a wager of £25 was made between two men, Joseph Smith and Jack Biggs. In the backyard of the Sprent Hotel in Ulverstone they chopped three-foot tall standing blocks, but a dispute broke out over the winner, resulting in a free-for-all-brawl. Impromptu contests became common, however, and the sport gradually organised, gaining in popularity as it spread to all states. In 1891 the United Australasian Axemen's Association was formed to establish rules.
The first woodchopping event at the Show was held in 1899 in a paddock which doubled as a cattle ring. Programmed on the last day of the Show as an attraction to boost attendance, the match was an instant success with a crowd of 8,000 turning out to watch.
Twenty-six competitors vied for prizes which ranged from £5 to £25. Four of the eight Heckenberg brothers from Green Valley, near Liverpool, were favourites, but the day was won by a Victorian named MacKinolty, who had won championships in three colonies. Despite their initial defeat, the Heckenbergs were to become stars of the sport, finishing their careers with eleven championships between them. The suburb of Heckenberg is named after them. Family dynasties of competitors have been common ever since.
The Woodchop competition was successfully staged again at the 1900 Show, but was then discontinued until 1906, possibly due to the lack of an appropriate venue. Every year thereafter, Woodchop has been a feature of the Show – except for a brief, unexplained disappearance in 1910.
 
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THE LARGEST CATTLE STATION IN THE WORLD - ANNA CREEK STATION.
 
 
The Anna Creek Station was bought by Sir Sidney Kidman, Australia’s so-called “cattle king”, who owned large areas of land across Australia during his lifetime.
Kidman was thirteen when he ran away from his Adelaide home in 1870 with only 5 shillings in pocket and a one-eyed horse that he had bought with his savings. His teen years, Kidman worked as a drover, stockman and livestock trader, and made money supplying services to new mining towns springing up in outback. Eventually he had saved enough to buy his own station.
Kidman began gobbling up one estate after another until he was the biggest landholder in the world by World War I. At one point, the size of Kidman’s properties exceeded the size of the entire United Kingdom.
His family still owns more than 10 million hectares, or about three-quarters the size of England. With a herd of 185,000 cattle, S. Kidman & Co is one of Australia's largest beef producers.
 
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28 minutes ago, Buckshot Bear said:
THE LARGEST CATTLE STATION IN THE WORLD - ANNA CREEK STATION.
 
 
The Anna Creek Station was bought by Sir Sidney Kidman, Australia’s so-called “cattle king”, who owned large areas of land across Australia during his lifetime.
Kidman was thirteen when he ran away from his Adelaide home in 1870 with only 5 shillings in pocket and a one-eyed horse that he had bought with his savings. His teen years, Kidman worked as a drover, stockman and livestock trader, and made money supplying services to new mining towns springing up in outback. Eventually he had saved enough to buy his own station.
Kidman began gobbling up one estate after another until he was the biggest landholder in the world by World War I. At one point, the size of Kidman’s properties exceeded the size of the entire United Kingdom.
His family still owns more than 10 million hectares, or about three-quarters the size of England. With a herd of 185,000 cattle, S. Kidman & Co is one of Australia's largest beef producers.
 
435063221_1754540365035691_5091885696570348005_n.jpg.d7b183f80a5d1a0df4bdbeb9ba6a2f16.jpg
 
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Looks like an airstrip on the edge of the property in the third pic. 

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1 hour ago, Abilene Slim SASS 81783 said:

Looks like an airstrip on the edge of the property in the third pic. 

 

Its rare that the big (or smaller) stations don't have airstrips. 

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“NECESSITY BECOMES THE MOTHER OF INVENTION” - 1876
The chance to find a fortune in the gold fields saw farm labourers abandon the vast wheat farms of NSW and Victoria in huge numbers. The cost of labour skyrocketed so enterprising landowners began making crude machines that could reap and bind grain, often built from leftover machine parts and scraps of metal, like the contraption pictured here. Such was the demand that the government of Victoria held a competition offering a prize of AUS £1,000 for the most viable reaper and binder machine.
 
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“THE TASMANIAN DEVIL”
 
The devil became extinct on the mainland some 3,000 years ago – before European settlement, due to being hunted by the Dingo. It is now only found in Tasmania. With no dingoes found in Tasmania, the Tasmanian devil is now the island state’s top predator.
Throughout the 1800s, there was a concerted effort by Tasmanian farmers to eradicate the species, which were thought to kill livestock. Thankfully, the devil did not suffer the same fate as it is a relative to the Tasmanian tiger.
 
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6 hours ago, Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474 said:

Doesn't look anything like the one in the Bugs Bunny Cartoons!

Are you SURE it's a REAL Tasmanian Devil??

 

 

       ........ the bandaged hand holding the camera confirms it .........  :mellow:

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NED KELLY’S ARMOUR - 1880
Ned Kelly famously wore a suit of armour, fashioned from the thick metal parts of a farmer's ploughs (seen here laid out by police after his capture). The suit made him impervious to bullets and had the added effect of making Kelly seem larger and more intimidating.
The suit did however leave his legs exposed, a flaw exploited by the police during a siege in the small Victorian town of Glenrowan. Kelly stepped away from the fallen tree he was using as cover and was brought down by police gunfire.
 
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SHEARING SHEEP - 1880’s
It was back breaking work for shearers.
An average merino fleece weighs up to 40 pounds (18kg) and the blade shears they used weren’t much more sophisticated than gardening clippers. They were paid the relatively large sum of 11 shillings per hundred sheep, with rations.
One shearer at the time said that if he had a good run of shearing he could “take a trip to one of the big centres and live like a lord the rest of the year.” The shearers pictured are blade shearing on the Lilyfield property in Jindera, NSW.
 
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