Sage Creek Gus SASS #64320 Posted January 19, 2011 Share Posted January 19, 2011 The Governor of California is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote jumps out and attacks the Governor's dog, then bites the Governor. 1. The Governor starts to intervene, but reflects upon the movie "Bambi" and then realizes he should stop because the coyote is only doing what is natural. 2. He calls animal control . Animal Control captures the coyote and bills the State $200 testing it for diseases and $500 for relocating it. 3. He calls a veterinarian. The vet collects the dead dog and bills the State $200 testing it for diseases. 4. The Governor goes to hospital and spends $3,500 getting checked for diseases from the coyote and on getting his bite wound bandaged. 5. The running trail gets shut down for 6 months while Fish & Game conducts a $100,000 survey to make sure the area is now free of dangerous animals. 6. The Governor spends $50,000 in state funds implementing a "coyote awareness program" for residents of the area. 7. The State Legislature spends $2 million to study how to better treat rabies and how to permanently eradicate the disease throughout the world. 8. The Governor's security agent is fired for not stopping the attack. The State spends $150,000 to hire and train a new agent with additional special training re: the nature of coyotes. 9. PETA protests the coyote's relocation and files a $5 million suit against the State. Montana : The Governor of Montana is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A Coyote jumps out and attacks his dog. 1. The Governor shoots the coyote with his State-issued pistol and keeps jogging. The Governor has spent $0.50 on a .45 ACP hollow point cartridge. 2. The Buzzards eat the dead coyote. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Poverty Bill, SASS# 45790 Posted January 19, 2011 Share Posted January 19, 2011 Montana, the last best place. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bad Hand Posted January 19, 2011 Share Posted January 19, 2011 Texas Gov. Rick Perry actually did that, he used his personal Ruger .380. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mack Hacker, #60477 Posted January 19, 2011 Share Posted January 19, 2011 Texas Gov. Rick Perry actually did that, he used his personal Ruger .380. Texas didn't have to issue Perry a handgun, and the dog got away without a scratch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
porcupine kid Posted January 19, 2011 Share Posted January 19, 2011 I LOVE IT!!! shoot,shovel,and shut-up! that's what I say. PORCUPINE KID Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boon Doggle Posted January 19, 2011 Share Posted January 19, 2011 Texas Gov. Rick Perry actually did that, he used his personal Ruger .380. That’s right… http://www.thefirearmblog.com/blog/2010/05...coyote-special/ And no, I did not buy one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lone Dog, SASS #20401 Posted January 19, 2011 Share Posted January 19, 2011 I LOVE IT!!! shoot,shovel,and shut-up! that's what I say. PORCUPINE KID Who would bother to bury a coyote? "Buzzards gotta eat, same as worms..." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BLACKFOOT SASS #11947 Posted January 20, 2011 Share Posted January 20, 2011 Texas Gov. Rick Perry actually did that, he used his personal Ruger .380. Total cost the the State of Texas, 00.00, total cost to the governor, one wimpy .380 round. Ya' gotta' love it!! Blackfoot Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tomboy Posted January 20, 2011 Share Posted January 20, 2011 Gus, As a Californian, I must protest. You vastly underestimate the ability of CA pols to spend money. -Tom Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bad Bascomb, SASS # 47,494 Posted January 20, 2011 Share Posted January 20, 2011 Texas and Montana-- been to both, got kinfolk in one. It's kinda like being in AMERICA! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rippin kid Posted January 20, 2011 Share Posted January 20, 2011 In WV the Governor would not be jogging and would just run the coyotes over with his truck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocDisaster # 45431 Posted January 20, 2011 Share Posted January 20, 2011 "Montana Sucks go home and tell all your friends!!!!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Purple Sage Lady #43039 Posted January 20, 2011 Share Posted January 20, 2011 Very funny! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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