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Everything posted by Alpo

  1. You should not put up your Christmas decorations before Thanksgiving
  2. I didn't trip. It bit me when I was stealing one of its eggs for my breakfast omelette.
  3. Thinking about various preachers I have known through my life. When I was in the sixth grade our preacher was Dr Whitsett. At the time that really meant nothing to me, but later when I was thinking about it, I decided that he must have a doctorate in something - most likely theology. But he's the only preacher I remember that was Doctor somebody. The other ones were just Reverend. I just started wondering what you have to do to be a reverend? Is there some course you have to finish, like for a doctorate? Or is it just a title given to anyone that's a preacher?
  4. Alpo


    Y'all having trouble reading the calendar, or typing? First Ron talks about Friday the 18th, and the 18th is Thursday. Then Pat talks about Friday the 29th, and the 29th is Monday.
  5. It is also clickbait. It's the nasty food that Baby Boomers still insist on eating. All from the point of view of a millennial White bread toast. Meatloaf. Jello. And the comments they make about the reason why you should not eat this horrible food. This is one of the best clickbaits I've ever clicked on https://www.heraldweekly.com/tragically-gross-foods-baby-boomers-wont-let-die/7?xcmg=1
  6. Alpo


    The 18th of November is not Friday. It is today. Thursday. Did we already miss it?
  7. It is amazing how long it has been since I have eaten fast food. When Michael came to visit, he apparently did not like Burger King because he blew down all four of them in the county. For the longest time - maybe a year after that -none of them (any fast food place, not just Burger King) were really open, because they had to rebuild them, and their employees were busily getting their houses back together. Then here came the plague, and they were all closed once again. Now they're open, but you have to do drive through. You can't go inside and sit down. You can't even go inside and order. I don't do drive through. I started going to Golden Corral about once a month for breakfast, maybe 6 months ago. That's the only food I have eaten in the last 4 years that I didn't cook.
  8. That one I understand. Them damn seagulls. But RIDE? I don't get it.
  9. I wonder how much money was supposed to be in the bank? I've only got to the part where he gave him the gun, but they're going to steal $10,000 from the Army, to buy 200 rifles, and use the 200 rifles to shoot up the town and rob the bank? Why not just take the $10,000 and run?
  10. I watched that video several times. I never saw evidence of him being shot. No big gushing blood. The three people down range didn't seem upset. No WHAT THE ***** YOU DOING YOU STUPID **********. YOU ALMOST SHOT ME!!!!! He tossed it back on the counter, and the clerk didn't make any effort to secure a loaded gun? What I saw was a customer handling a small automatic pistol, racking the slide back, and then either the slide lock malfunctioned or that gun did not have a slide lock, and he pinched the heel of his hand between the slide and the barrel. M1 thumb, except it was a pistol and the heel of his hand.
  11. If you want to make the joke as clean as it was when I first heard it waaaaaaaaay back when I was a yonker, the punchline has the doctor say (when I heard it it was a doctor) "Now where do you suppose I left my pen?"
  12. I have read that they are used for sharpening, which makes no sense. I have also read they were used for eating - just general-purpose knives. Like pulling out your pocket knife instead of your Bowie. That one makes a little more sense. Although why you would need two I don't know.
  13. I thought it sounded a little familiar myself, Kid.
  14. Well that's simple. The states with the lax gun laws have low murder rates because they don't have any guns. All of their guns have been bought and smuggled into states that have harsh gun laws. You just don't think like a liberal. If you did, you would already know this.
  15. That's okay. The other word doesn't have an r in it. Dang Aussies donno how to spell.
  16. Terror of Tiny Town is an excellent B Western. I also happen to like Rustler's Rhapsody.
  17. I wonder what they'd do if everyone does not order the same meal?
  18. Amanda, whose middle name is Marie, shared a story she had written. To put it into context, Amanda is an orphan who was adopted by a couple with two sons. When they returned her to the orphanage she had welts on her arms and legs. Not a very funny comic, but you asked.
  19. While I'm pretty sure the war started in 12, we beat 'em in 15. Just to keep the record straight.
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