Alpo
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Posts posted by Alpo
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That is frost
Last time it snowed here was January of 14. 11 years. I took photographs of the blizzard.
The ground in front of my house.
The hood of my truck.
Man o man, it got COLD that day.
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Just above the grill work in the fender, there are two round darkish things. Horns, maybe? And then just above them there's a rectangular light. And when you blow the picture up so you can actually see it, you can tell that's what it is.
But looking at it on my phone, it looks like a skull wearing a hat.
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11 minutes ago, Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 said:
Ya got thermal underwear? A parka? Ushanka? Mittens? Mouse boots?
The closest I have to a parka is an M65. So when I go out I put on my Sherpa vest.
And then my Marlboro Man sheep coat.
I do have a ushanka.
I'm not really sure if I like it though. It's been some time now since there's been any hair touching my forehead.
And that fur tickles. Keeps my head warm, though.
Mittens make it difficult to pull the trigger, so I wear gloves. Just in case.
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47 minutes ago, Buckshot Bob said:
The last time I drove in the snow - it was February in New Jersey - it not only had snow on the ground but it was snowing. So I had the windshield wipers on.
It was also night time.
So I'm driving down the road and all of a sudden something went flashing past the driver's window - couldn't have been more than an inch away from the truck.
Scared the bejesus out of me. I snatched the wheel to the right so hard, to avoid whatever the hell almost hit me, I almost went off the road.
As the windshield wipers were clearing the fresh snow off the windshield, it was piling it up on the left side. And eventually the pile got big enough that the slipstream pulled it over the edge, and it went whipping down past the car. And that's what I saw out of the corner of my eye.
Now maybe y'all folks that drive in the snow are used to things like that, but that was not only the last time I drove in the snow, I believe it was the first time I drove in the snow. And it was startling.
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I got up this morning and stepped out the front door. Looking through the path cut in the hedge I saw the grass was white.
What was going on?? I looked next door, and the entire lawn was white!
Oh no! The world is ending!!
I look at my truck. There is white stuff on the hood of my truck!!!
So I go over and look at my lawn. It has cold wet white stuff on it.
And I didn't stock up on milk and bread!!!!! Me and the dog are doomed!!!!!!!!!
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signed
FLORIDA
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You reckon that's an accidental portmanteau? Got ejected confused with evacuated?
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Mary Tyler Moore show episode. Someone is talking about a great stock investment, and Ted wants in on it. So he opens his wallet and pulls out three $500 bills to buy in.
Mary, watching this, turns to Murray and asks why Ted would carry $500 bills.
Murray says, "This is why. Hey Ted. You got that $10 you owe me?"
And Ted says, "Sorry Mur. All I have are 500s. You have change?"
At the end of the show, in the little kicker right before the ending credits, Murray again asks if Ted has the $10, and again Ted says that all he has is 500s, and did Murray have change.
And Murray says, "Yes I do. I went by the bank during lunch."
And he reaches down in his desk drawer and comes up with a big sack and sets it on the desk with a clank. Opens the sack and starts counting out nickels. "5, 10, 15, 20, 25 ..."
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We need a sticky cartoon thread
in SASS Wire Saloon
Posted
Had not heard the term, although I kind of guessed what it meant. So I looked it up. Found this.
"How to Shoot an Etruscan Double
By Phil BourjailyJun 13, 2024
How to Shoot an Etruscan Double
A friend of mine who was a colonel in the Army Reserve told me one day word came down from above that ethnic humor would no longer tolerated, as some might be offended. His solution was to substitute “Etruscan” for “Irish,” “Italian,” or “Polish” in any joke. The Etruscan civilization disappeared about 3,000 years ago, so he figured there were no Etruscans left to offend.
Which brings us to the Etruscan Double, known in less PC times as the Scotch Double. That’s two birds with one shot, a very thrifty use of ammunition, hence, 'Scotch'.”