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  1. My little local liquor store, which prides itself on having over a hundred different selections of single malt scotch, has a parrot whose life I saved early last winter. When I first went in there when the bird was new I noticed that it was freezing to death because they leave the doors open from open until they close. Well this poor bird was in a cage shivering like a naked Eskimo in Alaska. I brought the store clerks attention to the matter and he, Jesus (Haysoos) said that he had just got the bird and didn’t know much about them so I told him to put a cover over the cage and sit a heater underneath to warm the bird up and sure enough the parrot survived. Well a few months ago I started saying “Jesus (Haysoos) where’s your scotch” every time I went in there, two or three times a week and no not always for scotch. Anyway I went into the store today to get a bottle of scotch and the bird says “ Haysoos where’s your scotch”? and it sounds just like I do. I asked Jesus (Haysoos) if I could teach him how to say other stuff and he told me only if there wasn’t any swearing so I said “You bet your a$$” when I walked by the parrot cage this afternoon.
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