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Posted
On 2/2/2026 at 1:29 PM, Injun Ryder, SASS #36201L said:

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That's nachos business. 

Posted

I recently bought a chicken to make some sandwiches.

It doesn’t. It’s noisy and poops all over the floor.

 

 

And this is why you shouldn't hire poultry for kitchen work, they always run a-fowl!

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Posted

My meal tonight was pretty dry and tough. Stringy even.

 

 

 

They said it was a dinner jacket.

Posted

What’s the secret ingredient in Nutella?

 

 

I’m nutellin’ you…..

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Posted

What do you call a line of rabbits marching backwards?

 

 

A receding hare line 

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Posted

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Posted

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Posted (edited)
On 2/2/2026 at 7:13 PM, Buckshot Bear said:

I want to buy a new boomerang.

 

 

But how can I get rid of the old one?

Dude!  That is what fire places and camp fires are for.

 

True story:  some guys were throwing a boomerang on the beach at Vung Ro in 'Nam.  Some of us were body surfing.  The Boomerang ended up in the water and they asked us to get it and throw in back.

 

Never saw it again!

Edited by Forty Rod SASS 3935
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Posted
On 2/7/2026 at 10:46 AM, Forty Rod SASS 3935 said:

Dude!  That is what fire places and camp fires are for.

 

True story:  some guys were throwing a boomerang on the beach at Vung Ro in 'Nam.  Some of us were body surfing.  The Boomerang ended up in the water and they asked us to get it and throw in back.

 

Never saw it again!

 

Loved it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted

My doctor advised me to take 2 tablets 4 times a day.

 

 

That's why I got arrested inside an Apple store!

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Posted
6 minutes ago, Buckshot Bear said:

My doctor advised me to take 2 tablets 4 times a day.

 

 

That's why I got arrested inside an Apple store!

 

   ...... is that your local green-grocer ?

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Posted
7 minutes ago, Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062 said:

 

   ...... is that your local green-grocer ?

 

There wasn't even an iWitness

Posted
2 hours ago, Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062 said:

 

 

    ...... did the black-eyed peas not see you ?

 

Nearly choked on an artichoke.

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Posted
6 hours ago, Injun Ryder, SASS #36201L said:

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The coughing will keep you busy, and stop you from getting board.

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Posted

When planning a garden, what amount of space do you need for fungus?

 

 

As mushroom as possible.

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Posted

I recently saw a documentary comparing the portrayal of Jack Reacher by Alan Ritchson and Tom Cruise

it was titled

 

"All Reachers Great and Small"

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Posted

What happens when the smog lifts off Los Angeles?

 

 

UCLA

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Posted

How much does a roof cost?

 

 

Nothing, it's on the house.

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Posted
2 hours ago, Buckshot Bear said:

How much does a roof cost?

 

 

Nothing, it's on the house.

One of the Louis L'Amour books, the hero is eating at a restaurant in a little cowtown, and when he got through he asked the guy that owned the place - how much I owe you?

 

The owner tells him "it's a tin roof".

 

What??

 

"It's on the house."

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Posted
On 2/8/2026 at 7:48 PM, Buckshot Bear said:

 

The coughing will keep you busy, and stop you from getting board.

It's not the cough that carries you off. It's the coffin they carry you off in, quite often! :o:rolleyes:

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Posted

What do you call a cow with no legs?

 

 

 

Ground beef.

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Posted

Q) What do you call a chiuahua that loses his car?

A) Joaquin

 

Q) What do you call somebody with no body and no nose?

A) Nobody knows 

 

Once I had a cross eyed girfriend, it just didnt work out. We just couldnt see eye to eye!

Now that I think about it, she may have been seeing some on the side!

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Posted

I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes.

 

She hugged me.

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Posted

Sundays are always a little sad,

 

 

but the day before it is a sadder day.

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Posted

What do you call a lazy kangaroo?

 

 

A pouch potato

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Posted

What do you call a kangaroo with no tail?

 

A hopless case.

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Posted

Did you hear about the guy who cut off the left side of his body?

 

He's all right now.

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Posted

I am lactose intolerant.

 

 

 

I don't like people who are missing fingers either.

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