Really Sharp

[Subdeacon Joe]

 

 

 

[Alpo]

Wow. She could understand what that man was saying over that whistling screaming background "music"?

[Forty Rod SASS 3935]

Must be a very successful lawyer to afford the most unprofessional, outrageous, eye-popping jacket I've ever seen, and all while spouting non-sensical crap.

 

My wife worked in a marvelous attorney's office for just about 25 years.  When he hired someone new he would look for professional attire and carriage (his word, not mine) before he even looked into the applicant's credentials.

 

Once in awhile he would take on a worthy person and "mold' him (or her) into what he wanted.

 

This geek wouldn't even have gotten into the waiting room.

[Alpo]

Lawyers. In My cousin Vinny, the court appointed lawyer for the two boys had a stutter.

 

For a movie that's funny.

 

But I was on a jury one time, and one of the two councils had a stutter. I thought then, and I still think - if I had a job that required me to speak for a living, and I had a speech impediment, I would look for a new job.

 

Unless, maybe, he thought that juries would find for him out of sympathy because "the poor man has a stutter"?

[Sedalia Dave]

Almost as sharp as the leading edge of a bowling ball.

[Blackwater 53393]

My dad was a criminal court officer before being moved up to the state supreme court.  I got to spend a couple of summers in criminal court during trials.

 

There was an attorney there who wore the most outlandish suits! Colors that were either eyeshocking or styles that were theatrical in nature and every one was perfectly tailored and perfectly groomed.

 

He was very successful and exceptionally capable. He only worked the highest profile criminal cases where domestic violence was involved. Otherwise, he specialized in divorce cases.

 

He and my dad were good friends and often met for lunch when neither was in court. I was sometimes allowed to join them. I asked him, one time, why he wore such gaudy suits in court, (he usually didn’t even wear a suit jacket if he wasn’t in the courtroom) and he told me that when he was in front of a jury and had the floor, that he wanted EVERY EYE IN THE ROOM on him!!

 

I can say with absolute certainty that he had their attention!!

[watab kid]

well , im waiting for dust to settle but i have an opinion ill keep to myself for now , i think these people have finally outdone the VN era folks , 

[Smokin Gator SASS #29736]

My favorite dumb gun take was from the politician who identified herself as a "gun expert". She'd been studying the topic for years. She's the one who said she wasn't overly concerned about people who had regular full capacity standard magazines (refered to as high capacity" because you could only use them once. One use and they were no good anymore according to her years of study. 

[Eyesa Horg]

I remember that comment as well!

[Sheriff Dill]

We have a SA here in our court district who dressed in very color catchy and popping outfits and colors her hair when I was in Law Enforcement. She handled alot of my cases and she was successful. I was always amazed on how some attorneys dressed. Some of the suits did not fit the way they should, hair was a complete mess , etc. 

 

I had one in a trial one time that looked like he had just rolled out of bed. He asked me why I used my tazer on his client. And if I had ever been tazed. I responded I had been tazed and told him his client bit me after we had been wrestling around in pancake batter. He then asked if it hurt. I responded with it doesn’t feel good and if he wanted I could taze him so he could try it out. The judge laughed and the attorney was so mad he threw his binder down and stopped questioning me.