Tips - Are You Suffering From Tip Fatigue Also?

[Calamity Kris]

Am I being nasty or do others suffer from "tip fatigue" as well.

 

I went to a big box store last evening to buy some things.  One of then was a case of bottled water, which another customer helped load into my cart.  As I was leaving I asked for assistance with loading the water into my car.  A gentleman approached and we walked to my car.  I opened it up and he loaded the case of water into the back.  I thanked him for his help.  He then walked to my drivers door and stood silently with his back to me.   I proceeded to load the rest of the items into my car, which took another 5 or so minutes.  When I finished up and closed the lift gate, he was still standing next to the drivers door, still with his back turned.  Since he was blocking the path between me and the drivers door, I locked the doors and went around the back of the car next to me to return the cart to the coral.  He saw this and silently walked away.  I can only assume he was waiting for a tip and when he realized he wasn't going to get one, he left.

 

I would have been more than happy to give him a tip if he had even offered to help me with the rest of the groceries or to take the cart away, but he didn't.  Some of the groceries were heavier items like cases of canned goods.

 

Another tipping case happened when Uno and I were returning from a trip out of town.  It was raining and we didn't want to go through the bother of stopping at a sit down restaurant for breakfast so we went through a drive through.  When I told them I was going to pay by card, they held up the credit card terminal which asked for a tip amount before allowing me to tap my card for payment.  I hit no tip and proceeded to the payment.  You didn't do anything that isn't part of your job.  Why should I give you a tip for that?  That being said, if she had been really friendly, extra helpful or really kind, I would have no problem with a tip.  However, being grumpy and nasty, especially after she found out the tip amount was zero, doesn't warrant a tip in my view.

 

I know that these are minimum wage jobs.  I completely understand and I'm sympathetic to that.  However, insisting on a tip for simply doing the job you are paid to do doesn't work for me.  Going above and beyond, I'm all over it.

 

Am I just being a Grinch or are others tired of this trend as well?

Edited December 13, 2025 by Calamity Kris
speleeing

[Linn Keller, SASS 27332, BOLD 103]

You're not at all wrong, dear heart!

[The Original Lumpy Gritz]

Stay the course.....

[Sgt. C.J. Sabre, SASS #46770]

You are absolutely correct. I understand that some jobs, wait staff, etc. get a substantial portion of their wages from tips. Now I tip for good service, but when tipping isn't expected as part of their income, like you said, going through a drive thru, (I'm presuming fast food), NO! Same thing at Subway. When checking out, the register asks if you want to tip the person that is paid to take your order and make your sandwiches ANYWAY. I see this a LOT.

Here's one for you. Waffle House. The last time I was there, they had a sign that a 10% of your bill would be added for Take Out, and an ADDITIONAL 10% would be added as a tip for the wait staff that got you your food. Guess where I haven't been to lately? 

[Boggus Deal #64218]

I’m with you 100%!!!

[Eyesa Horg]

34 minutes ago, Calamity Kris said:

Am I being nasty or do others suffer from "tip fatigue" as well.

 

I went to a big box store last evening to buy some things.  One of then was a case of bottled water, which another customer helped load into my cart.  As I was leaving I asked for assistance with loading the water into my car.  A gentleman approached and we walked to my car.  I opened it up and he loaded the case of water into the back.  He then walked to my drivers door and stood silently with his back to me.   I proceeded to load the rest of the items into my car, which took another 5 or so minutes.  When I finished up and closed the lift gate, he was still standing next to the drivers door, still with his back turned.  Since he was blocking the path between me and the drivers door, I locked the doors and went around the back of the car next to me to return the cart to the coral.  He saw this and silently walked away.  I can only assume he was waiting for a tip and when he realized he wasn't going to get one, he left.

 

I would have been more than happy to give him a tip if he had even offered to help me with the rest of the groceries or to take the cart away, but he didn't.  Some of the groceries were heavier items like cases of canned goods.

 

Another tipping case happened when Uno and I were returning from a trip out of town.  It was raining and we didn't want to go through the bother of stopping at a sit down restaurant for breakfast so we went through a drive through.  When I told them I was going to pay by card, they held up the credit card terminal which asked for a tip amount before allowing me to tap my card for payment.  I hit no tip and proceeded to the payment.  You didn't do anything that isn't part of your job.  Why should I give you a tip for that?  That being said, if she ha been really friendly, extra helpful or really kind, I would have no problem with a tip.  However, being grumpy and nasty, especially after she found out the tip amount was zero, doesn't warrant a tip in my view.

 

I know that these are minimum wage jobs.  I completely understand and I'm sympathetic to that.  However, insisting on a tip for simply doing the job you are paid to do doesn't work for me.  Going above and beyond, I'm all over it.

 

Am I just being a Grinch or are others tired of this trend as well?

In agreement 100% and would've done as you did.

When I help an elderly person or handicapped at the store, I damn sure don't expect a tip! I'd sure appreciate a simple "Thank you", but even that seems to be asking a lot these days.

I've even gotten bad looks and a couple times a snide comment for holding the door for someone,young or old. Just don't understand folks way if thinking anymore!

Merry Christmas Kris 🎄

[Rye Miles #13621]

48 minutes ago, Calamity Kris said:

Am I being nasty or do others suffer from "tip fatigue" as well.

 

I went to a big box store last evening to buy some things.  One of then was a case of bottled water, which another customer helped load into my cart.  As I was leaving I asked for assistance with loading the water into my car.  A gentleman approached and we walked to my car.  I opened it up and he loaded the case of water into the back.  I thanked him for his help.  He then walked to my drivers door and stood silently with his back to me.   I proceeded to load the rest of the items into my car, which took another 5 or so minutes.  When I finished up and closed the lift gate, he was still standing next to the drivers door, still with his back turned.  Since he was blocking the path between me and the drivers door, I locked the doors and went around the back of the car next to me to return the cart to the coral.  He saw this and silently walked away.  I can only assume he was waiting for a tip and when he realized he wasn't going to get one, he left.

 

I would have been more than happy to give him a tip if he had even offered to help me with the rest of the groceries or to take the cart away, but he didn't.  Some of the groceries were heavier items like cases of canned goods.

 

Another tipping case happened when Uno and I were returning from a trip out of town.  It was raining and we didn't want to go through the bother of stopping at a sit down restaurant for breakfast so we went through a drive through.  When I told them I was going to pay by card, they held up the credit card terminal which asked for a tip amount before allowing me to tap my card for payment.  I hit no tip and proceeded to the payment.  You didn't do anything that isn't part of your job.  Why should I give you a tip for that?  That being said, if she had been really friendly, extra helpful or really kind, I would have no problem with a tip.  However, being grumpy and nasty, especially after she found out the tip amount was zero, doesn't warrant a tip in my view.

 

I know that these are minimum wage jobs.  I completely understand and I'm sympathetic to that.  However, insisting on a tip for simply doing the job you are paid to do doesn't work for me.  Going above and beyond, I'm all over it.

 

Am I just being a Grinch or are others tired of this trend as well?

This has become rampant and I totally agree with no tipping on take out orders drive through or if I go inside to puck up the meal. It’s ridiculous! 

[Cowtown Scout, SASS #53540 L]

A lot of time when using electronic purchase it is built into the software of the device so it adds a step to click no tip.

[Cypress Sun]

 

I tip according to service...and pay scale. Sit down restaurant, bar, delivery person and/or the like...yep.

 

Most of these fast-food places can't even get your order right. No way in hell am I tipping a fast food "server" for giving me the wrong order, that's been sitting under the heat lamp for the last 20 minutes, a tip of any kind.

 

When an establishment, no matter the establishment, declares that they will apply a percentage of the purchase to the total of the bill...I usually will not visit their business.

[Blackwater 53393]

I tip for good service! I sometimes tip the cook or chef separately if the food is exceptional!!

 

Schoolmarm was a server/waitress, working her way through college when we met, so we tend to be generous when service is good.

 

I have a couple of friends who work as servers on commision. They only make money from what they are able to sell and from tips received.  When I go to such a place, if the food is good and the service is even adequate, I will tip well!  Most of the time, servers in this situation are exemplary!!

 

Edited December 13, 2025 by Blackwater 53393

[Blackwater 53393]

I will add that I DON’T tip at drive through or fast food restaurants where the food is pre-prepared and usually served with a frown or a dismissal!

 

If I see a sign or a post in the menu that they automatically add a “gratuity” I AUTOMATICLY get up and leave!

 

If the service is bad or the food isn’t good, I tell the server and usually the manager why I’m not tipping!

 

 

[Smokin Gator SASS #29736]

We rarely eat at sit down restaurants.  90% of the time when we do it's when we get together with my two daughters family's that includes 5 grandkids. 5 months to 11 years old. They are well behaved but the kids are excited to be with their cousins. I always tip well because it does take more work with the 5 kids. It's a rare event and  I would rather tip well then be on the short side.

 

All the other requests for tips I'll consider on a case by case basis.

[Forty Rod SASS 3935]

7 minutes ago, Blackwater 53393 said:

I will add that I DON’T tip at drive through or fast food restaurants where the food is pre-prepared and usually served with a frown or a dismissal!

 

If I see a sign or a post in the menu that they automatically add a “gratuity” I AUTOMATICLY get up and leave!

 

If the service is bad or the food isn’t good, I tell the server and usually the manager why I’m not tipping!

 

 

We think alike a lot (Scary, ain't it?)  I tend to be big tipper...if I get good service, and if it's friendly.  It paves the way to great service at the same place later on.  I NEVER leave any place without leaving at tip, though.  Two nickels or seven pennies, etc. isn't really a tip, it's a comment.  Learned that from Dad.

 

Twice in my life I left before the food was served and only paid for the drinks.  I spent a considerable time on both occasions letting the manager (and anyone else who happened to listen) precisely. a bit loudly, and somewhat harshly exactly why I was doing that.

 

One of them called the police so I waited in the front of his cafe and explained to the officer why I did what I did.  He told the manager that I had paid for what I got and since he never delivered anything else I owed nothing.

 

A few months later the place closed up and went out of business.

 

Oh my!  I lost no sleep over that.

[DeaconKC]

I am a generous tipper for someone actually working to wait on me. I even leave tips at a buffet for someone clearing the table or filling drinks. BUT I am not tipping you for standing behind the counter.

[Rip Snorter]

I tip pretty well at all my favorite spots.  One particular little dive we visit weekly, is almost a club and we get exceptional service.  I tip lavishly.  Bad service / good food?  Under 15%.  Bad & Bad?  Haven't had that in many years - don't know.  Fast food? Never at drive through, I will dump change in the cup on the counter at my favorite Dairy Queen - old fashioned good fast food, friendly service.

Edited December 13, 2025 by Rip Snorter

[Boggus Deal #64218]

My job requires me to eat out a few times a week at lunch. I tip well for good service even if the food is not the best. Usually when I show up, my drink is waiting on me when I get seated. They call me by name. And if I’m not seated in their section, they make a point to come say hi to me. 

[Buckshot Bear]

Tipping is not a thing in Australia. 

[Alpo]

I damn sure wish it wasn't here.

 

"You have to tip the waitress, because they don't get paid enough to live on. They depend on your tips!!!"

 

Here's an idea - let the restaurant pay them enough money to live on, and charge more for the food. Then I can decide if I want to pay $25 for a hamburger.

 

But no, the restaurants in this country pay as little as they can get by with - less than minimum wage. Less than the required amount by law because it's "wait staff", and we the customer are expected to make up the money that the waitress needs to live on.

 

I feel that if the waitress is not earning enough from her employer to live on, she needs to quit that job and go find another one somewhere else that pays better. I managed to work 40 odd years, support myself and a family of six, without getting any tips. That's so amazing.

[Yul Lose]

I tip for good service at walk in restaurants. Fast food joints are required to pay $20.00 an hour minimum wage and I don’t do fast food very often with the exception of Chick Fillet and I’ve tried to tip those kids that work there because they really do a good job of taking my order and getting it right, BUT they aren’t allowed to take tips and hand them back. My wife likes a place called the Habit Burger and nearly every time we’ve gone there our order has been screwed up one way or another so we don’t tip. 

[Dirty Dog Doug]

$50 tip for $33 lunch check ?

cause my "date" was rude  to very good server

we had menus and water in a minute sala in 3 minutes 

great food and service  but my "date" did not like how the staff dressed  { she picked the place ]

 

what about happy hour driinks at half price .. tip for full price 

[The Shoer 27979]

Sorry if this has been said already, but for some reason we're are in a tip me for doing my job time, everybody thinks they should get a tip just because and with no other reason. Between my wife and I we tip, but if they try to guilt me into a tip is turn into instant  Ahole

[Doc Shapiro]

Guilt culture continues.  

 

We tend to go to the same local pub on a regular basis.  Food is good, folks are nice.  I tip well there.  They bought me a round on my birthday.

[The Shoer 27979]

5 hours ago, Eyesa Horg said:

 I'd sure appreciate a simple "Thank you", but even that seems to be asking a lot these days.

I've even gotten bad looks and a couple times a snide comment for holding the door for someone,young or old. Just don't understand folks way if thinking anymore!

I will open or hold the door for anybody, dont matter male, female, young, old, any race, any religion. If they say anything discouraging, I go from very nice to very rude and crude, I am the same with helping someone. I do not take any disrespect from anybody if I am being nice and/or helpful.

[Crazy Gun Barney, SASS #2428]

I tip generously for things that deserve it. Sit down restaurants with good service, my barber, my tattoo guy. I do not tip at places just because they have a cup marked for tips or at a takeout place, fast food place, or anywhere else that involves no more service than “do you want fries that”.

[Sgt. C.J. Sabre, SASS #46770]

11 minutes ago, Doc Shapiro said:

Guilt ENTITLMENT culture continues.  

FIFY.

[Dirty Dog Doug]

43 years as Union carpenter   no cash tips but we where building Apt for nice group of Nuns 

2 days  a week they us brought cake or cup cakes 

..better than $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

[Blackwater 53393]

I worked for and with a guy who ran a top echelon transmission company and partnered with me and another man on a very nice racing operation. We did R&D work for several racing parts and equipment manufacturers and did high end custom work on the side.

 

He took in a custom truck project that I spent the better part of a year in construction. When it was finished, the owner was so pleased with the quality that he tried to hand the shop owner an envelope with a thousand dollars in it! Billy, the shop owner handed it back and said he should give that to me because I was the one who did the work!

 

We’d occasionally gotten tips for a good job or for expedited service, but that was the biggest “gratuity” I ever saw!! 
 

Made for a great example of what doing good work can really mean!!

[Sedalia Dave]

I tend to tip well. The local grocer has baggers that will take your cart to the car and unload it into the car. When I first started going there I tried to tip and the young man told me he couldn't accept it. If they accepted a tip they would get fired.

 

So now I address them by name and make small talk with them. Just to let them know they are more than just a person. Really makes them perk up when you call them by name.

 

3 times in recent memory I have been to a sit-down restaurant where the service was slow.  Paying attention it was obvious that at least one or more of the wait staff failed to show and the poor person that did was struggling to keep up. As long as they are busting their butt I'll still tip well. After all it's not their fault that their coworker(s) didn't show up for their shift.

 

Today we ate at a great mom and pop burger joint about 1.5 hours from the house. Place was full and the wait staff was really hustling to keep up so the service was a little slow.  Food was excellent and I never saw any of the staff slacking off.  When I went up to the counter to pay at least three of the staff zipped by loaded down with food while telling me they would be back as soon as they could. When one finally stopped to take my money I let her know that the food was excellent. She apologized for me having to wait so long to pay and I told her it wasn't like she or anyone else wasn't working their keesters off. That made her crack a little smile. Paid cash instead of my card and left a little better than a 50% tip which made her smile even bigger. She started to protest but I cut her off by wishing her a Merry Christmas as I turned and left. 

 

Now give me crappy service for no reason and I'll be sure to just leave a couple coins on the table.

 

[Matthew Duncan]

Gentlemen don’t accept tips from Ladies.

 

My children paid their way through college on the tips they got waiting on tables.  They both disliked a Sunday shift because tips were slim to none.  Time for me to pay forward.  I tip generously especially on holidays and if they appear college age.  I remember one just before Christmas.  Oily disarrayed, bangs ,  sweat on forehead, appeared she was working an exhausting double shift.  I paid in cash and told her the change was her tip.  My wife and I was getting up to leave when the waitress returned.  She said that I had made a mistake, did I know how much I had given her?  I said yes and Merry Christmas!  The look of relief on her face gave me the impression that she needed the tip badly.  She even started towards to hug me (I come from generations of non-huggers).

[Blackwater 53393]

Schoolmarm and I regularly visit a local Italian restaurant. The day, (ten years ago) that we got the news that she was cancer free was the first time we went to this place and it has become a very special place! 
 

There’s a server there who has been there for most of that time and he is fantastic! I have seen him handle the entire floor almost single handed, (the kitchen staff often delivers appetizers and entrees) and never seen him with an order pad! He handled our Cowboy Lunch Gang with fifteen guests and never got a single thing wrong or out of place!

 

He always has our drinks at the table before we get settled and he seems to anticipate everyone’s needs almost telepathically!  The entire staff knows our names and they go out of their way to see that everyone is taken special care of!

 

Al, our server and friend, always gives Schoolmarm a big hug and usually slips her a second glass of wine with her meal.  He’s friendly to everyone, but he makes special effort to see that we’re taken care of!

 

I know that we tip him well, (very well) and I have seen others who do the same!

 

People like him SHOULD be taken care of because they go far beyond what is “expected” of them and they take pride in their work!

 

 

[Rip Snorter]

1 minute ago, Blackwater 53393 said:

Schoolmarm and I regularly visit a local Italian restaurant. The day, (ten years ago) that we got the news that she was cancer free was the first time we went to this place and it has become a very special place! 
 

There’s a server there who has been there for most of that time and he is fantastic! I have seen him handle the entire floor almost single handed, (the kitchen staff often delivers appetizers and entrees) and never seen him with an order pad! He handled our Cowboy Lunch Gang with fifteen guests and never got a single thing wrong or out of place!

 

He always has our drinks at the table before we get settled and he seems to anticipate everyone’s needs almost telepathically!  The entire staff knows our names and they go out of their way to see that everyone is taken special care of!

 

Al, our server and friend, always gives Schoolmarm a big hug and usually slips her a second glass of wine with her meal.  He’s friendly to everyone, but he makes special effort to see that we’re taken care of!

 

I know that we tip him well, (very well) and I have seen others who do the same!

 

People like him SHOULD be taken care of because they go far beyond what is “expected” of them and they take pride in their work!

 

 

An all pro!  Have had only a few over many years.  They add so much to the dining experience that they are worth a generous, even excessive gratuity!

[Gateway Kid SASS# 70038 Life]

A few “rules” I use deciding on tips. 
1) if I place my meal order while standing at the counter or through a speaker….

No tip

2) if I have to pick up my meal at the other end of the counter… no tip

3) if I have to get up and get my own drink refill… no tip

4) if the service sucks (no silverware, napkins, water etc.) no tip and we usually leave. 
5) if I am waiting twenty or thirty minutes (sometimes more) to get my meal after ordering, it better be awesome food or… no tip. Not my problem your kitchen is slow, if I wanted to take that much time for a meal I am a better chef than most restaurants have and would make my own meal at home. 
Sorry, not sorry!

Regards

    

Gateway Kid

[Dapper Dave]

The funny thing is, with the electronic tipping gizmo...how do we know they even GOT the money, or did we just "tip" the owner? 

Also reminds me, a lot of people are going to find out very soon how that "no tax on tips" thing is going to work when tax season jumps out on top of us. 

[Ozark Huckleberry]

I don't think you're wrong for the issues with the loader or the drive-through. The former did a minimal effort service, the drive through just passed the bags. 

 

Maybe having toted trays and owned a restaurant effects the way I deal with tipping.

 

I don't tip for fast food, but otherwise I tend to leave a (generous) tip, even for a carry-out order if it's from a full-service restaurant that we frequent.

 

I will sometimes leave a very small tip for poor service, but when I do I ensure the waiter involved understands why. Not loudly, not insultingly -- just an explanation.

 

I understand the idea that instead of the wait staff having to depend on tips for their income, the restaurant should pay them more and adjust the prices accordingly. But isn't that pretty much what is happening when the restaurant automatically adds a tip to the bill? That seems to rub people the wrong way, too.

 

Sometimes a grumpy waiter is just having a bad day. Sick kid, car breakdown, whatever. I know -- it's not my problem, they need to put a happy face on and be professional, etc. But hitting someone who is already struggling with a lousy tip seems too much like kicking them when they're down. (Refer to the 'leave a very small tip' comment above). If someone's simply being a jerk, they need to understand that their low tip isn't just because I'm stingy. If someone's having a rotten day, being treated like more than a fixture in a restaurant can make a big difference for them.

 

I do have tip guidelines that work for me:

- My wife and I rarely eat two entrees anymore; most times we split one. When we do split an entree, I calculate the tip based what the bill would have been had we ordered two full meals.

- If any part of my meal has been comped for reasons other than to make up for inconveniencing me (senior discount is a common one) I'll add half the comp into the tip, which is calculated based on the full un-comped price.

- For a standard tip, I'll go 20%, round it up, add a dollar. Around Christmas, I might even add a few dollars more. The difference between a 15% tip and a 20% tip? On a $50 meal, it's a few bucks. We don't dine out all that much, so it's not as if we're going to have to sell a kidney to make that leap. 

[Rye Miles #13621]

I still work part time tuning pianos, I never expect a tip because I feel I charge enough that I  don’t need a tip. That said, I do get tips especially around the holidays and it’s really appreciated but I’m always surprised!