Don’t Call Me Maam

[Yul Lose]

I had an appointment this morning in Escondido and arrived early. The person assigned to help me asked me if I had brought my two identification documents and I said “Yes Ma’am” and she told me not to call her that. I was surprised but asked her “What?” and the person told me “I’m not a Ma’am”. The rest of our transaction was rather tense and I was sure not to call the person that again when I said “Thank you”.

 

I was raised to say Yes ma’am and No Ma’am and Yes Sir and No Sir and remember getting my butt warmed on several occasions for not using the Ma’am or Sir when addressing someone so it’s pretty engrained in my mind to do so. I told my step daughter about it awhile after it happened and she told me that transitioning and questioning people consider it an insult and hate speech to be referred to as something they’re not. I can’t understand what’s going on in our society anymore if simple politeness can be construed as hate speech. 

[Rye Miles #13621]

Sounds like she is a left wing whacko🤪

[Subdeacon Joe]

Every time I hear that I think of Barbara "I'm Too Important To Be Called Ma'am" Boxer.

 

 

After that I started calling her Congresswoman. When one her staph(sic) tried to correct me in an email exchange, I asked when the Senate had stopped being part of Congress. 

[Crazy Gun Barney, SASS #2428]

I know women who hate to be called ma'am and men who hate being called sir.  These are all people younger than me.

[Yul Lose]

6 minutes ago, Rye Miles #13621 said:

Sounds like she is a left wing whacko🤪

 

1 minute ago, Crazy Gun Barney, SASS #2428 said:

I know women who hate to be called ma'am and men who hate being called sir.  These are all people younger than me.

That’s the strange thing about the person, middle aged, pretty clean cut, nothing to tip me off about political or sexual leanings. Seemed like a regular person.

[Alpo]

14 minutes ago, Crazy Gun Barney, SASS #2428 said:

I know women who hate to be called ma'am and men who hate being called sir.  These are all people younger than me.

These are people that consider sir and ma'am to be terms used to old people.

 

"Don't call me ma'am. I'm not old enough to be a ma'am!" or "Don't call me sir! I'm not old enough to be a sir!!"

 

These are the same people that will tell you that their name is Joe, because Mr Smith is their father. They'll be 40 years old but they're too young to be called Mr Smith.

 

These are people that don't wish to grow up.

 

I'm not sure what I would do in Yul's situation. If I call a woman ma'am and she said not to call her ma'am because she wasn't a ma'am, I believe I would say yes sir. Because if you're not a ma'am then obviously you're a sir.

 

Unless you are an anal orifice.

[Subdeacon Joe]

First time I was called "Sir" I was 18.  Working a Saturday matinee at the Avo Theater in Vista. Little girl,  maybe 9 or 10, asked me if there was a payphone she could use.

 

Made me feel old.

[Cowtown Scout, SASS #53540 L]

I was also brought up to say Sir and Ma’am. This year at Montana state when talking with an older cowboy I used Sir and he said “Don’t call me Sir I worked for a living” so I said sorry.  My guess is he was past military as an NCO and Sir was what you said to Officers.

[Dirty Dan Dawkins]

I held a door open for a lady at a public rest stop in Maine once. Now this was in southern Maine so its a mixed bag of  pollutedliberal nut jobs and Somalis, with about 35% normal folks. Never know what you'll get.. So the door was jacked up and took a lot of force even for me to just to open.
As I was exiting, this group of ladies in their late 60's-70's approached. The bitch in front told me she didn't need me (a man- so easy for these people to identify and define a man but cant define a woman, I digress) to hold a door open for her. I told her it was broke and particularly difficult to open. The southern drawl through her off momentarily, but quickly had effect in elevating her sense of  Yankee superiority. In a snark she communicated she could manage without me, at which point she nearly ripped both arms off , and once more I grabbed and swung open the door to allow for her entry. She looked appalled with how the situation unfolded and certainly by my courtesy after her dismissive behavior.  She offered neither thanks nor further comment, and I am assume she is off somewhere making some poor sap miserable or groaning to some other unfortunate man that his gentlemanly gesture was nothing more than misogyny. 

[Rip Snorter]

They never apologize since they are never wrong.  I do as I have always done.  Worst case, if you grin or laugh at them they flip out.

[Dirty Dan Dawkins]

7 minutes ago, Rip Snorter said:

They never apologize since they are never wrong.  I do as I have always done.  Worst case, if you grin or laugh at them they flip out.

I agree

[Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062]

8 minutes ago, Rip Snorter said:

They never apologize since they are never wrong.  I do as I have always done.  Worst case, if you grin or laugh at them they flip out.

 

 

       ........ that's when you tip your hat and say "Yes Ma'am" ........   😉

[Rip Snorter]

1 minute ago, Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062 said:

 

 

       ........ that's when you tip your hat and say "Yes Ma'am" ........   😉

Actually, it might be funnier, (unless dealing with a Govt. Bureaucrat) to say "Yes Sir!

[Calamity Kris]

We have a couple of  "different" folks working on my floor.  In order to get out of the whole gender ideology thing, I go out of my way to not address them using gender at all.  I just say  "yes" not 'yes sir" or ma'am.  Most of the time, I avoid talking to them entirely.  I just stand there and smile.  Keeps me out of HR.

[Crazy Gun Barney, SASS #2428]

Anything to stay out of HR is good.  I was called in once because of a phrase I used.  At the time, we bought the cheapest low grade steel at work, unless higher graded steel is required.  The cheap stuff was giving horrific mixed results and I made reference to buying steel that was "stamped out by slave children in a third world country"... which was pretty much an accurate description of this discount steel they found.  I was never told for certain who complained... or if it was the "slave children" comment or the "third world country" comment.  In any event, I was told to be careful about what I said and who I said it around.  I smiled, gave the HR lady a "yes ma'am" and went back to work.  

[Jiminy Cricket]

I was raised to say Yes Ma'am and/or Sir.  Then I joined the Marine Corps where I was taught everyone is a Sir.  So now if I am corrected for saying Yes Ma'am, I will say Yes Sir on the next round.  If I'm corrected again, and typically more agitatedly, the few times this has happened.  I say "As you wish" al la The Princes Bride.  I don't think they get the reference, but it gives me pleasure.  If conversation continues, I will leave off the Ma'am or Sir, but I do still say please and thank you.

 

Regards,

Cricket

[Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062]

 

 

 .. someone recently showed a clip of "Gomer Pile" getting into trouble for how he addressed a female officer ......

            ...... might be good for a giggle to repeat it here ........

                         🙃

[Forty Rod SASS 3935]

37 minutes ago, Rip Snorter said:

Actually, it might be funnier, (unless dealing with a Govt. Bureaucrat) to say "Yes Sir!

I was just going to say to say "Thank you, Sir" as you walk away.

 

I never mind being called "sir' unless I'm at a Marine Corps event.  Then I ask then not to call me "sir.  I was a Gunnery Sergeant and had to work for a living.

 

Now, if the event is an Army event I'll say "thanks", because before I was a Marine I was an Army Captain.

 

That has started a lot of interesting conversations.

 

I answer to "Your Highness" or "Your Worship" too.

[Rip Snorter]

26 minutes ago, Forty Rod SASS 3935 said:

I was just going to say to say "Thank you, Sir" as you walk away.

 

I never mind being called "sir' unless I'm at a Marine Corps event.  Then I ask then not to call me "sir.  I was a Gunnery Sergeant and had to work for a living.

 

Now, if the event is an Army event I'll say "thanks", because before I was a Marine I was an Army Captain.

 

That has started a lot of interesting conversations.

 

I answer to "Your Highness" or "Your Worship" too.

You must be closing in on "Oh, Ageless One".

[Colorado Coffinmaker]

 

Sorry Rye,  has nothing to do with being a "Left Wing Whacko."  You get the same krap from all sides of the spectrum.  Some folks, right, left, middle just want to be Bullies.  Male, Female, doesn't matter, just see hell bent on putting others down to act their idea of superior.  Can't call everyone "Lefties."  You right handed by the way 🤪

Edited September 11 by Colorado Coffinmaker

[Texas Joker]

Don't call me sir I work for a living is my gut response.

 

I was raised and taught to give everyone respect. I use Sir Ma'am and Lady as honorific 

[WD Farren]

2 hours ago, Yul Lose said:

 

That’s the strange thing about the person, middle aged, pretty clean cut, nothing to tip me off about political or sexual leanings. Seemed like a regular person.

You're in CA.
'Nuff said.

[H. K. Uriah, SASS #74619]

Assuming it was not a "too young to be a ma'am" thing, maybe she objects to contractions.   "Oh, sorry about that madam."

[John Kloehr]

21 minutes ago, H. K. Uriah, SASS #74619 said:

... "Oh, sorry about that madam." 

 

From my upbringing, that would be assuming her career...

[Texas Lizard]

9 minutes ago, John Kloehr said:

 

From my upbringing, that would be assuming her career...

Hope her ladies are quit.....OR do they work out of a                            .......

 

Texas Lizard

[Subdeacon Joe]

1 hour ago, Rip Snorter said:

You must be closing in on "Oh, Ageless One".

 

Wouldn't that be "Ageless Wonder?"

[H. K. Uriah, SASS #74619]

28 minutes ago, John Kloehr said:

 

From my upbringing, that would be assuming her career...

Oh, you thought I meant the *other* meaning of madam.  That was not my intention!

And I've got some ocean front property in Arizona for sale real cheap.

[Linn Keller, SASS 27332, BOLD 103]

I've addressed both female co-workers, and a female supervisor, as "Madam" ... with an edge to my voice ... in both cases I honestly did not care if I got called into HR for it, I was ready to walk. In one case I did.

My one and only time of being addressed for addressing a female person as "Ma'am" I gave a courteous half-bow and said in deep-voiced gravity, "My Lady."

She looked like I'd smacked her across the face with a cold dead fish.

[Rip Snorter]

Hey, if you are up to it, "Sorry, Darlin' "  Boots and a Stetson are useful.

[Sgt. C.J. Sabre, SASS #46770]

1 hour ago, Forty Rod SASS 3935 said:

I answer to "Your Highness" or "Your Worship" too.

 

1 hour ago, Rip Snorter said:

You must be closing in on "Oh, Ageless One".

 

7 minutes ago, Subdeacon Joe said:

Wouldn't that be "Ageless Wonder?"

Your Royal Hind A$$ is probably most accurate. 

As for me, I usually say "Yes Ma'am" or "Yes Sir" when talking to people. At 71, I get a bit of a kick calling a 20 something woman "Ma'am. It throws them for a loop.

In Yul's situation, I probably would have apologized, (tongue firmly in cheek), and said, "Then how DO I address you then?", and done so until our interaction was complete. THEN I might say something like, "Thank You ma'am, have a good day", just because I'm a jackass.

On the other hand, when somebody calls ME Sir, I usually respond with, "Don't call me Sir, I was a Sergeant". It's such a habit that I don't even think about until I've already said it, since I was a Sergeant in The Marines. When they look at me like "WTH?" I tell them, "Sorry, old habit."

[Rye Miles #13621]

3 hours ago, Yul Lose said:

 

That’s the strange thing about the person, middle aged, pretty clean cut, nothing to tip me off about political or sexual leanings. Seemed like a regular person.

Maybe she looks normal but she sounds like a whacko!🙄

[Highwall]

I'm so glad I live in Kansas! We don't have these kind of problems. LOL

Yes sir and yes ma'am is not a problem.

[Blackwater 53393]

I’ve been known to give those people a salty reply.

 

My favorite is, “I’m sorry! Please take note of the mistletoe on my shirt tail!” after which, I turn and walk away!

 

I figure they are trying to be offensive and I respond in kind!

[Forty Rod SASS 3935]

3 hours ago, Rip Snorter said:

You must be closing in on "Oh, Ageless One".

That boat sailed  a long time ago.

Edited September 12 by Forty Rod SASS 3935

[Forty Rod SASS 3935]

I still wear  a "cowboy" hat.  I tap the brim for men, tip it women and little girls, take it off if talking to a lady.  I will also open a door for everyone.

 

I revel in the responses I get:  some laughs. some big smiles, some very enticing smiles, some startled looks, and a few scowls.

 

I had a lady about ninety smiled and thanked me.  Said it reminded her of her father and husband, and both her sons still tip their hats to her and take them off when talking to her.... and treat their own wives that way, but she has noticed they don't do it for all women.

 

It cost me nothing and it makes me feel good.  At my age I get away with a lot of things a younger man wouldn't.  Ladies, and some gents think I'm just a harmless funny old duffer.  Lord, if they only knew.