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ENEMY AIRCRAFT IN MY AIRSPACE!


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I am a peaceable man by nature, but I have boundaries.

Enemy aircraft crossed that boundary.

War was declared, and the enemy paid the ultimate price.

I showed no mercy whatsoever.

I will defend my Tactical Area of Responsibility to my last breath, and that may be quite literal.

Y'see, my wife is allergic to wasp venom.

So am I.

Have Epi Pen, will travel!

I set up the portable ham radio antenna on the back deck -- a seven section, folding manpack antenna and a Big Kansas coil, with window screen for counterpoise, brought in the 20 meter Hurricane Watch Net better than my base station's EFHW wire antenna.

UNFORTUNATELY --

Three Yellow Jacket wasps came blazing in like fighter planes on an attack run when I opened the back door.

My wife was in the bedroom; I closed the bedroom door, shut off all lights, drew the curtains back from the back door window glass, hoping it would attract them: I took a bottle of Windex in hand and went hunting.

One went down, hard hit with a proximity blast: two more were ambushed, and became casualties of kinetic weaponry.

I declared the war over, the enemy vanquished: the enemy dead were interred with due ceremony

(flush) 

My wife still doesn't know about it. 

Don't tell her.

When she was a Brownie Scout with shoulder length hair, a yellowjacket got under her hair, couldn't get out, found her ear and went all Singer Sewing Machine on her, stung her about seven hundred thousand times while sounding like a B17 on heavy takeoff: to this day, anything that buzzes near her head and she just plainly comes unglued.

I will politely refrain from describing her artistic amalgam of an Apache war dance with the Tarantella, in our driveway, when a hummingbird came within a foot of her left ear.

Now that she's allergic -- and so am I -- a yellowjacket sting is a deadly threat.

I have absolutely no mercy when it comes to such enemy incursion!

 

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My dad was deathly allergic to insect stings!  It was before epinephrine was readily available!  Saw him take on a dozen one time. Snapped ‘em outta the air with a shop rag!!  
 

He was death with a rag or towel!!

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I load up the .45 Vaquero's with blanks using SG primers.   My ariel target shooting ain't exactly the best, but I have fun blasting

a few of them and letting those who survive know its time to leave the war zone.

 

I'm not allergic to the stings and rarely get popped.   But I still keep an agressive attitude towards Yellow Jackets and Wasp.

 

..........Widder

 

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44 minutes ago, Cold Lake Kid, SASS # 51474 said:

My personal choice.

you-cant-handle-the-fire.jpg


Schoolmarm and I were traveling to a job interview for me in Florida. Just as we passed the weigh station on 75 going into Florida, the truck I was driving quit running. It was dark and when I got out to get tools out of the back to check it out, I was attacked by fire ants.

 

 I brushed them off and high stepped around to the front of the truck and found a burned ignition rotor.

 

I hiked back up the road to the weigh station and they let me use the phone, (this was 1986. There were few cell phones)

and I called a wrecker service and got them to bring me the part. It was the next morning when the driver showed up with my part.

 

When I finished the job, I drove forward a few yards.  The truck I was driving was one we used for a tow vehicle at the drag strip and it happened to have a five gallon jug of VP C14 racing gas in the back. I had a serious grudge on for those damned ants.

 

I walked back with the can and found two ant mounds beside the road’s shoulder. I poured the entire can down those two holes slowly.  I let it soak for a few minutes and the lit a cigarette, (Yeah! I smoked back then) and hotboxed the hell out of it. Then I tossed it in one of the ant mounds.

 

There was a low “WHUMP” sound and fire spouted out of about half a dozen places alongside the road.

 

That gas was $6.00 a gallon back then and that may well be one of the most satisfying $30.00 I ever spent!

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