Alpo Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 From the book The Princess Diaries. She's a 9th grader and she's going on her first date. Well, I’m sitting here in my new dress, my new shoes, my new nails, and my new panty hose, with my newly waxed legs and underarms, my newly touched-up hair, my professionally made-up face, and it’s seven o’clock, and there’s no sign of Josh, and I’m wondering if maybe this whole thing was a joke, like in the movie Carrie I can see waxed legs, but waxed underarms? I saw a woman in the store one day, and she was reaching for something on a high shelf, and I saw that she had a tattoo that ran from the bottom of her arm down to the top of her rib cage. Right through her underarm. Now I could see getting a tattoo on her arm - a lot of people do. And one on her torso - again, a lot of people do. But getting stabbed several gazillion times in her underarm?? EEEWWWWWW!!! 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alpo Posted June 18 Author Share Posted June 18 Apparently I'm not the only one that thinks that. Two pages later in the book. But if Josh Richter stands me up, I can assure you, I will not have a frivolous reaction. I got my LEGS waxed for him. Okay? And if you think that doesn’t hurt, think about having your UNDERARMS waxed, which I also had done for him. Okay? That waxing stuff HURTS. I practically started to cry, it hurt so bad. So don’t be telling ME we can’t call out the Genovian national guard if I get stood up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Colorado Coffinmaker Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 Why would I be interested in shiny Pits?? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. Zook Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 Alpo, you should probably stay far away from any place that advertises a Brazilian wax job w/o a good supply of firewater for anesthetic medicinal purposes.... 3 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chantry Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 (edited) On 6/18/2024 at 10:53 AM, Alpo said: I can see waxed legs, but waxed underarms? You need to try it and report back to us with your findings. Edited June 19 by Chantry 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Subdeacon Joe Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 (edited) Considering how many women get square nanometer, fore and aft, below the waist waxed regularly, waxing the pits shouldn't be a surprise. ADDED: Back in my much younger days, before the time when many square feet of tattoo were considered normal, I had an intimate encounter with a young lady who had tattoos twixt her nether cheeks. Rose leaves, I believe they were. Edited June 18 by Subdeacon Joe 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cypress Sun Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 58 minutes ago, Alpo said: I can see waxed legs, but waxed underarms? Just a helpful hint. If you want to see their waxed underarms, ask them to surrender. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Texas Lizard Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 1 hour ago, Dr. Zook said: Alpo, you should probably stay far away from any place that advertises a Brazilian wax job w/o a good supply of firewater for anesthetic medicinal purposes.... Could have a blood pressure problem... Texas Lizard 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sgt. C.J. Sabre, SASS #46770 Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 1 hour ago, Chantry said: You need to try it and report back to us with our findings. With Pics! 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Subdeacon Joe Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 Just now, Sgt. C.J. Sabre, SASS #46770 said: With Pics! NO!!!! NO PICTURES!!! 3 1 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Texas Lizard Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 7 minutes ago, Subdeacon Joe said: NO!!!! NO PICTURES!!! I second that.... Texas Lizard 3 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eyesa Horg Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 2 hours ago, Subdeacon Joe said: Considering how many women get square nanometer, fore and aft, below the waist waxed regularly, waxing the pits shouldn't be a surprise. ADDED: Back in my much younger days, before the time when many square feet of tattoo were considered normal, I had an intimate encounter with a young lady who had tattoos twixt her nether cheeks. Rose leaves, I believe they were. Had a manager once whom per one of my techs, had bees tattooed exiting her private area! It was embarrassing sometimes, if she was giving the crew some lame speech about something stupid, you'd hear guys going Bzzzzz! She'd always turn a shade of red, but it never kept her away unfortunately! 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sgt. C.J. Sabre, SASS #46770 Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 27 minutes ago, Subdeacon Joe said: NO!!!! NO PICTURES!!! I meant of his FACE while it's being done! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Subdeacon Joe Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 5 minutes ago, Sgt. C.J. Sabre, SASS #46770 said: I meant of his FACE while it's being done! NO! NO PICTURES! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Texas Lizard Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 (edited) 1 hour ago, Sgt. C.J. Sabre, SASS #46770 said: I meant of his FACE while it's being done! Heavy breathing pictures not wanted either..... Texas Lizard With smiles....Still NO.... Edited June 18 by Texas Lizard 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sedalia Dave Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 (edited) 2 hours ago, Eyesa Horg said: Had a manager once whom per one of my techs, had bees tattooed exiting her private area! It was embarrassing sometimes, if she was giving the crew some lame speech about something stupid, you'd hear guys going Bzzzzz! She'd always turn a shade of red, but it never kept her away unfortunately! Like This Edited June 18 by Sedalia Dave 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eyesa Horg Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 (edited) Wellll, isn't he/she annoying My boss was actually pretty easy to look at! But what a B!! Until the rank n file went on strike, then it seemed I was her hero!!! Still never got to see the bees though or the hive for that matter! Edited June 18 by Eyesa Horg 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JD Lud Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 No one else wonder why Alpo is reading that? also I have a hippie sister in law. I would much prefer to see a clean, waxed armpit than one with just as much hair as I have….its shocking to me but to each their own. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eyesa Horg Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 I long ago stopped wondering about Alpo. Now I'm usually just amused! 1 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cypress Sun Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 10 minutes ago, Eyesa Horg said: I long ago stopped wondering about Alpo. Now I'm usually just amused! I don't wonder about Alpo. Seems like normal curiosity to me. I just wonder where he finds all the time to watch all of these tv shows, read all these books and watch all of the movies that he posts about. As far as hairy female armpits are concerned, many women of European and Asian countries do not shave, or wax, their armpits. Hairy female armpits aren't a turn on in my book but I'm neither Asian or European either. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Warden Callaway Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 On the contrary, I seen a picture of I think Sophia Loren in her early years and she displayed arm pit hair. I was a bit shocked but realized it was probably normal in Italy in those days. Wax on, wax off. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eyesa Horg Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 That's how you could tell the Italian aircraft during the war, they were the ones with hair under the wings I know, boo hiss! 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PowderRiverCowboy Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 (edited) 7 hours ago, Subdeacon Joe said: Back in my much younger days, before the time when many square feet of tattoo were considered normal, I had an intimate encounter with a young lady who had tattoos twixt her nether cheeks. Rose leaves, I believe they were. Did her farts smell like roses ? Just beating Alpo to the question because you know its coming Edited June 18 by PowderRiverCowboy 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buckshot Bear Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eyesa Horg Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 Oh, she'll wake up! 2 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Linn Keller, SASS 27332, BOLD 103 Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 ... and if I say anything at all, my hind hoof will drive hilt deep right between my pearly whites ... 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Subdeacon Joe Posted June 18 Share Posted June 18 43 minutes ago, PowderRiverCowboy said: Did her farts smell like roses ? Just beating Alpo to the question because you know its coming I have no idea. Not my thing. Very interesting that you would ask that.....a case of TMI? Projection? Quote I just wonder where he finds all the time to watch all of these tv shows, read all these books and watch all of the movies that he posts about. I've pondered that. I figure he took a speed reading class at some point for the books. Insomnia can explain the movies. Quote As far as hairy female armpits are concerned, many women of European and Asian countries do not shave, or wax, their armpits. Hairy female armpits aren't a turn on in my book but I'm neither Asian or European either. As long as she is otherwise clean, neither a turn on nor turn off for me. Same for unshaved legs - unless she is wearing sheer stockings. Quote No one else wonder why Alpo is reading that? Not I. I read sifi, alternative history, history, Church history, paranormal romances, the occasional western, Tom Clancy - which sort of fall into an "alternative history" category, and lots of cookbooks. 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cypress Sun Posted June 19 Share Posted June 19 34 minutes ago, Subdeacon Joe said: I've pondered that. I figure he took a speed reading class at some point for the books. Insomnia can explain the movies. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Warden Callaway Posted June 19 Share Posted June 19 One of my earliest memories was going to school with my older sister. I wasn't much more than a toddler. It was a one room country school. We stood around outside until the teacher showed up and unlocked the door. I followed the teacher in. I was shocked to see a mat of long black hair under her nylons. I later learned she was only 18 and hired to finish out the school year because the regular teacher had moved on for some reason. At that time, a high school diploma was all you needed to teach grade school. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alpo Posted June 19 Author Share Posted June 19 38 minutes ago, Cypress Sun said: Ahh, Los Cochinos. Tyrone Shoelaces. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alpo Posted June 19 Author Share Posted June 19 2 hours ago, PowderRiverCowboy said: Did her farts smell like roses ? Just beating Alpo to the question because you know its coming Why in the heck would I ask that? Many many many many years ago, the anal orifice was slangingly referred to as the "brown eye". Then maybe 20 years ago it changed, and was now called the "rosebud". If the rosebud is in between the cheeks, it absolutely makes sense to have rose leaves on the cheeks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alpo Posted June 19 Author Share Posted June 19 3 hours ago, JD Lud said: No one else wonder why Alpo is reading that? Alpo reads anything that looks interesting. And this was not a bad book, although it was quite different from the movie. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 Posted June 19 Share Posted June 19 14 hours ago, Subdeacon Joe said: Considering how many women get square nanometer, fore and aft, below the waist waxed regularly, waxing the pits shouldn't be a surprise. For a long time I puzzled over the meaning of “square nanometer” as if it might mean something else, then I realized you probably left out the word ‘every’. the current technique is to have it lasered. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hardpan Curmudgeon SASS #8967 Posted June 19 Share Posted June 19 16 hours ago, Colorado Coffinmaker said: Why would I be interested in shiny Pits?? You would prefer braided...? 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 Posted June 19 Share Posted June 19 8 minutes ago, Hardpan Curmudgeon SASS #8967 said: You would prefer braided...? Pigtails! Could be a new style! 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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