Would you take your dollar back?

[Alpo]

TV show, and they come upon a street performer. A magician. And after watching his trick, the guy drops a dollar into the hat.

 

The magician says, "A dollar?? Now I can pay for that operation my mother needs", or something similarly sarcastic. And I thought that if I had been the guy that put the money in the hat, I'da took it back. "Well obviously you don't want my dollar."

[Gateway Kid SASS# 70038 Life]

19 minutes ago, Alpo said:

TV show, and they come upon a street performer. A magician. And after watching his trick, the guy drops a dollar into the hat.

 

The magician says, "A dollar?? Now I can pay for that operation my mother needs", or something similarly sarcastic. And I thought that if I had been the guy that put the money in the hat, I'da took it back. "Well obviously you don't want my dollar."

Have done that.

If I am giving a gratuity for something and the person it is given to is sarcastic/ungrateful/snarky about my choice of how much.... then A ) he is to rich to need my money or B ) is a jerk and should find a more rewarding profession or C ) is making commentary on my evaluation of his worth and disparaging my ability to properly gauge his value to the world in general.

Same for any other service workers that feel that "20%" is a minimal gratuity with less being insulting to them (regardless of how bad their performance is). I do not accept a "standard" added in gratuity to my bill as well. I determine if the service/performance/experience is worthy of extra above the purchase price.

Regards

   

[Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984]

I’d think he really needed the money and toss in another penny.

[Red Gauntlet , SASS 60619]

I don't worry about it. When I let loose of it, it's his. If he's a jerk, it's his problem, not mine.

[Eyesa Horg]

Once it's thrown in the pot, I figure it's his/theirs now.

[Rye Miles #13621]

I would have a few not so kind words for him but I also would have left it in the hat!

[Pat Riot]

I have taken my donation back and for nearly the exact same reason. 
 

A guy in a wheelchair in downtown LA playing a violin and had a sign saying “Need donations for surgery so I can walk again.”

I was on the job. I had my vest on and my ID badge draped around my neck. His playing was very nice do I dropped a dollar in his violin case. He looked at it and said something like “Hey man, a dollar? You can afford more than that and hey, I pay your salary!”

This pizzed me off.

I reached down and grabbed my dollar and said “Obviously you aren’t paying enough. I need this back.”

He jumped up and approached me and I laughed and yelled out for all to hear:

”Holy Cow! You’re cured! You don’t need that surgery now! Everyone, come get your money back! He doesn’t need it!”

Then I walked away as he cussed me.

 

This and many other episodes like it are why I don’t give beggars money. If you work in Sh**ville long enough you become a bit calloused. 

[Eyesa Horg]

We have a guy that stands at the end of an exit ramp with the cardboard sign "need money for food, veteran". I've handed him a couple bucks on a few occasions. Very few I'll admit. About six months ago, I'm sitting at the light on there and he was up ahead walking with his sign and dressed in the same gross cloths. I come out of a store just up the road as he is changing his cloths and getting into a nice shiney new SUV!  He seems to do well as a beggar.

[Pat Riot]

@Eyesa Horg there are so many situations just like that. I have fallen for a couple. BUT, I have seen some truly needy people get their lives turned around and that does happen, it’s just that the scammers tarnish everything and after a while it galvanizes you into not wanting to help anyone. It’s truly a shame. 

[Eyesa Horg]

1 minute ago, Pat Riot, SASS #13748 said:

@Eyesa Horg there are so many situations just like that. I have fallen for a couple. BUT, I have seen some truly needy people get their lives turned around and that does happen, it’s just that the scammers tarnish everything and after a while it galvanizes you into not wanting to help anyone. It’s truly a shame. 

Exactly 

[Subdeacon Joe]

If I give it, it's his. No matter what.  If he's ungrateful, that's on him, not me.  I won't lower myself to his level that way.

Re: the fakes.  If I get taken for a couple of bucks now and then, Oh Well.  Again, that's on the thief, not on me.  
Once I had a guy come up to me and say, "I'm not going to lie to you, I want a beer. Do you have a couple of bucks?"  I gave him half a sawbuck and told him to buy a Guinness.

 

[Pat Riot]

1 minute ago, Subdeacon Joe said:

Once I had a guy come up to me and say, "I'm not going to lie to you, I want a beer. Do you have a couple of bucks?"  I gave him half a sawbuck and told him to buy a Guinness.

There was a guy I used to encounter in LA by Union Station that had a sign that said “Need money for beer.” I always gave him a couple of bucks just for being honest. 

[Rip Snorter]

In the hippy '60's I had a job in NYC and an apartment a few blocks from St. Marks Place.  There were always a lot of young folks panhandling, many with outrageous stories, none I recall claiming a handicap or veteran status.  Feelings were running high and Vietnam was a hot issue.  Change was worth something then and useful.  I would often give my pocket change for a fine story,

[Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984]

When I was in Russia or Ukraine, I would usually have a few small US bills for tips. A few of them were memorable. One time in Kyiv during Christmas shopping season my friends and I were waiting for a taxi.we waited a long time. A boy about ten came and offered to recite poetry ( for a tip of course). He was not poor, just young entrepreneur. We declined but he heard we were waiting for a taxi and offered to find one. He did and Katya gave him 5hryvna. I gave him a buck. He left saying something. Katya translated “ oh wow, my second dollar today.”

[Blackwater 53393]

We used to have people come into our shop and hand a card out with sign language illustrations and a plea for money.  I never carried my billfold or change while I was “on the floor.”  It was kept in my locker or in my car.  That way, my change wasn’t falling out of my pockets and I didn’t have to roll over a wallet if I crawled under a vehicle.

 

One afternoon, one of those people came into the shop. A couple of the guys gave him some change or a buck or two. As the joker walked away, I shouted, “You dropped some money!” and he turned and looked.

 

I waved to him, turned and grinned at the guys in the shop and went back to what I was doing.  
 

Several people were mad…

 

 

 

[Blackwater 53393]

To give a proper answer to the OP, I’d probably tell the recipient of my buck that I spent many years performing and received gratuity from many people. I’d further advise him/her/it that since I spent that dollar, I figure I’ve paid to speak my mind.  At that point, I might give a very critical review of the performance and my opinion of the performer as an artist AND a person!

 

 

 

[Cypress Sun]

If I gave them a dollar, I'd not take it back but he's not going to like what I have to say.

 

With the above said, I don't give money, or anything else, to beggars, bums and the like.

 

For about four years, I worked as the "ground guy" repairing parking lot lighting, signs, etc., with a 65' bucket truck. I really didn't have much to do except for the occasional troubleshooting problems with the wiring. Over those years, I think I heard every "story" out there. Some of the stories were simple and some quite intricate...but they were all bulls*** and all had been well rehearsed. I could spot them sauntering across the parking lots, trying to look nonchalant, headed our way to bum money. I got where I would ask them if they had a dollar I could have before they would ask me anything. One of them actually gave ME a dollar, he came back about 15 minutes later asking for it back...I gave it back to him.

 

One place we did once a month maintenance on the parking lot lights was a place called International Mall in Tampa. It's a very upscale mall where the wealthy shop. The parking lot always had a couple of Ferraris, Lambos, Maseratis and other high end 1/4 million dollar+ cars in it. Anyway, at the main entrance into the mall parking lot, there was always a shabbily dressed black man with a "Anything Helps" sign. He would park his Cadillac Escalade across the street in another parking lot,

Get his sign out of the back and head for the median and turn lane for the mall. Let me tell you, this guy made out good, between $200 to $300 for a four hour day. He'd make double that at Christmas time. How do I know this? I talked to him on a couple of occasions when he was taking a "break". I watched him in action many times and have not reason to doubt him.

 

The very last time someone tried to bum money from me, was in a WalMart parking lot. A 30ish couple walked up to me smoking cigarettes and her looking at a cell phone. He never got to finish his story before I pointed out that they could afford cigarettes and at least one cell phone, they didn't need my money...then I asked them if I could have a dollar. I didn't get it.

[Creeker, SASS #43022]

IF you decided on a dollar, pulled the dollar out of your funds, released the dollar into their bucket - then YOU have decided that a dollar is FAIR exchange for whatever story, entertainment or experience the other has provided.

 

The transaction is complete - and regardless of their words, actions or attitude afterwards - you don't get to change the transaction.

 

I always thought gifts were given for bettering the persons life or showing appreciation;  but this seems more like gifts are for the purpose of eliciting a reaction that "properly" strokes the ego of the giver.  

And apparently if the reaction is not properly satisfying - they think the gift can be rescinded.

[Pat Riot]

Do as you see fit. Don’t judge others for doing as they see fit. 

[Red Gauntlet , SASS 60619]

I give to my church, certain well-vetted charities, and to beggars. 

 

I got it from a wise parson I respected, several years ago, talking about street people begging and so on. As he pointed out, it's hard to know what to do. You don't want to enable drug use. You don't want to give to scammers. But there are down-and-outers who need a meal. So what he did was carry a lot of fives, make quick assessments, and give a fiver when it seemed right. Not enough to buy drugs by itself, but enough to buy food, which one buck won't really do.

 

So that's what I do. Not a lot; a few times a month. I make a very quick assessment of the person, and if it seems right, I give the fiver. Then it's out of my hands and I don't worry about it. But on several occasions I've seen the person go into a McDonalds or a sandwich shop. The amount I'm giving in this way is really miniscule, but it's something.

 

If someone is busking,  playing an instrument, anything like that, I alway drop something in. I don't see that as begging.

 

[Black Angus McPherson]

The new (to me at least) trick around here is buskers playing an electric instrument hooked to a speaker.  The guy I saw here was playing an electric violin.  The scam is that they aren't actually playing the instrument.  The speaker is actually hooked up to a CD player or some such and they are only pretending to play the violin.

 

 

[watab kid]

probably wouldnt have put it in to start with lessen id sought him out to hear his gig cause someone said he was good - at that point like red gauntlet id have left it and figured i got my dollars worth , 

 

if he was looking to pay for an operation he should look for a better payin job i guess 

[Sixgun Sheridan]

Wanna hear one that'll really make you shake your head? When I was in Beijing 20 years ago I would occasionally see a crippled child on the street begging me for money. My GF told me not to give them any money, as they were crippled on purpose and being forced to make money for their minders. The locals were all wise to it so they usually tried to con unwitting foreigners like me instead. Apparently in China as long as you don't murder someone or criticize the government the police tend to look the other way.

[Subdeacon Joe]

On 11/6/2022 at 8:26 PM, Red Gauntlet , SASS 60619 said:

But there are down-and-outers who need a meal.

 

I usually don't carry cash (although I've started taking out $20 every payday so I have some to give out).  One day I came out the supermarket and a guy was going from car to car begging. I told him I didn't have any cash.  I pulled out, saw him a few cars down, and told him to meet me across the street at the burger joint and I would stand him to whatever he wanted.  Got there, he came in a minute or two later, placed his very modest order.  I asked him if that was enough.  He added to it, came to about $15.  He kept shaking my hand and thanking me the whole time his order was being prepared.