Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062 Posted November 12 Posted November 12 I woulda ax'd whot 2nd prize was ...... 1 Quote
Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062 Posted November 12 Posted November 12 6 hours ago, Sedalia Dave said: I phoned my local radio station today. The guy said, “Congratulations! You’re our first caller! Answer one question correctly and you win the grand prize!” “Woohoo!” I said. “It’s a math question. Feeling confident?” “Yes! I have a degree in math and I teach at our local school,” I replied proudly. “Okay then… for 2 VIP tickets to meet Taylor Swift, What is 2 + 2?” “7,” I replied. my reply is above ^^^^^^ Quote
Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 Posted November 12 Posted November 12 A number of years ago I was on a flight and the crew were working hard to get everyone on board and seated in order to get off on time. Some of the passengers were taking their time getting into their seats although they were already at their row and had stored carry-ons. The pilot came over the intercom, “Could everyone please sit down now? I can’t see to back the plane up.” The aisles emptied in moments. Then the whole plane started laughing! Loved the humor the pilot used in order to get out on time. 3 4 Quote
Alpo Posted November 13 Posted November 13 Makes you want to quote Jan and Dean Go granny, go granny, go granny go Go granny, go granny, go granny go 👍 3 Quote
Cactus Jack Calder Posted November 13 Posted November 13 52 minutes ago, John Kloehr said: Must be one of Biden’s Buddies. Didn’t he say “ All you have to do is go out on the porch and shoot of a round from your shotgun”? “That’ll keep the buggers from your door”. CJ 3 Quote
John Kloehr Posted November 14 Posted November 14 (edited) 8 minutes ago, Alpo said: I would have worked something like that. Back when I was in a suburb, I would set up my display in the afternoon and tear it all down before midnight. Had fog machines, a graveyard, carved fancy pumpkins, and even dressed up to answer the door (favorite costumes were Woody from Toy Story and Waldo (I'm here LOL)). A pumpkin pair I would have done if it was a thing back then would have been: Edited November 14 by John Kloehr Royally dumb Otto fail 3 Quote
Subdeacon Joe Posted November 14 Author Posted November 14 3 hours ago, Cactus Jack Calder said: Must be one of Biden’s Buddies. Didn’t he say “ All you have to do is go out on the porch and shoot of a round from your shotgun”? “That’ll keep the buggers from your door”. CJ Balcony. Everyone has a balcony, not everyone has a porch. Quote
sassnetguy50 Posted November 14 Posted November 14 4 hours ago, Cactus Jack Calder said: Must be one of Biden’s Buddies. Didn’t he say “ All you have to do is go out on the porch and shoot of a round from your shotgun”? “That’ll keep the buggers from your door”. CJ From 2013 "I said, 'Jill, if there's ever a problem, just walk out on the balcony here, walk out and put that double-barrel shotgun and fire two blasts outside the house,'" Biden said. 2 Quote
Alpo Posted November 14 Posted November 14 39 minutes ago, sassnetguy50 said: From 2013 "I said, 'Jill, if there's ever a problem, just walk out on the balcony here, walk out and put that double-barrel shotgun and fire two blasts outside the house,'" Biden said. They used to be a British show called Lovejoy. In one episode this guy comes into a bookie joint with a sawed off double barrel. Points it up and fires a shot into the ceiling. Yells THIS IS A ROBBERY! GIVE ME THE MONEY! The guy behind the counter just looks at him. So he fires the other barrel into the ceiling and yells I SAID GIVE ME THE MONEY!!! The guy behind the counter, who was somewhere between Hulk Hogan and Andre the Giant in size, steps around the counter saying YOUR GUN'S EMPTY, MATE! Seems that if Jill followed Brandon's advice, and stepped outside and fired both barrels of the double in the air, the bad guy should immediately recognize that the gun is empty, and go on about his business. 5 Quote
Subdeacon Joe Posted November 14 Author Posted November 14 2 hours ago, sassnetguy50 said: From 2013 "I said, 'Jill, if there's ever a problem, just walk out on the balcony here, walk out and put that double-barrel shotgun and fire two blasts outside the house,'" Biden said. Also: https://www.fieldandstream.com/stories/guns/gun-control-joe-biden-interview In part: " V.P. BIDEN: Well, the way in which we measure it is–I think most scholars would say–is that as long as you have a weapon sufficient to be able to provide your self-defense. I did one of these town-hall meetings on the Internet and one guy said, “Well, what happens when the end days come? What happens when there’s the earthquake? I live in California, and I have to protect myself.” I said, “Well, you know, my shotgun will do better for you than your AR-15, because you want to keep someone away from your house, just fire the shotgun through the door.” Most people can handle a shotgun a hell of a lot better than they can a semiautomatic weapon in terms of both their aim and in terms of their ability to deter people coming. 1 Quote
Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 Posted November 14 Posted November 14 The humor is about the tshirts…..I snagged this from the food network site 2 Quote
Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 Posted November 14 Posted November 14 1 hour ago, Alpo said: houses of distinktion 1 1 1 Quote
Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 Posted November 14 Posted November 14 Leeroy was a worker in a small pharmacy in Arkansas, but he was not much of a salesman. He could never find the item the customer wanted. Arnold, the owner, had had about enough and warned Leeroy that the next sale he missed would be his last. Just then, a man came in coughing and he asked Leeroy for their best cough syrup. Well, try as he might, Leeroy could not find the cough syrup. Remembering Arnold’s warning, he sold the man a box of laxatives and told him to take it all at once. The customer did as Leeroy said and then walked outside and leaned against a post. Arnold had seen the whole thing and came over to ask Leeroy what had transpired. Leeroy explained, “He wanted something for his cough but I couldn’t find the cough syrup. So I substituted laxatives and told him to take it all at once.” Arnold exploded, “You did what?! Laxatives won’t cure a cough!” Leeroy replied, “Sure it will,” and he pointed at the man leaning against the lamp post. “Look at him,”… “He’s too afraid to cough.” 3 Quote
Subdeacon Joe Posted November 15 Author Posted November 15 11 hours ago, Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 said: The humor is about the tshirts…..I snagged this from the food network site That was one heck of an episode. Quote
Subdeacon Joe Posted November 15 Author Posted November 15 https://www.instagram.com/reel/DOaU1L_j_N8/?igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA== https://www.instagram.com/reel/DKjGw-NBVeb/?igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA== 1 2 Quote
Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062 Posted November 15 Posted November 15 5 hours ago, Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 said: ..... and, maybe, a scarf .... 1 Quote
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