Jump to content
SASS Wire Forum

"Forgive my bein' forward, ma'am ..."


Recommended Posts

First off, you have to understand I can get in trouble just settin' in my easy chair.

Second, I suffer terribly from a dreadful condition, it's called Hoof in Mouth and it strikes at the worst possible times.

That being said --

The wife had a sudden appetite for Taco Bell, her car needed filled up, both businesses are in the same building down in Wellington, so I was duly dispatched to fill her tank and her car's.

Wheeled through the drive-thru, no problem, got the goods, pulled up to the BP gas pump and I was just coming through the door to Pre Pay for my fill up, when the girl from the register came a-hustlin' out toward me ... she looked like she'd lost her best friend and I think she was afraid she was going to be snarled at, for she said "I'm really sorry but our computers just went down and took the gas pumps with them! We can't pump gas!"

I laughed and said "Forgive my bein' forward, ma'am, but I still think you have the loveliest smile," and I went back outside.

That poor little girl had the damndest look on her face!

I told my wife about the experience and she laughed and allowed as I'd just hit her with a Compliment Bomb!

Never heard the term before, but I reckon it fits!

(This fits with my weird, warped and twisted view of the world ... Scripture teaches "Vengeance is mine, I will repay, saith the Lord" but I am convinced the quote is incomplete: the Almighty subcontracts, and I am a subcontractor, and one of my favorite means of revenge is to practice good manners and kindly words in this plastic society in which we must exist!)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

You made that girl’s day. A compliment is always a nice thing as long as they don’t take it wrong. :P

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, LawMan Mark, SASS #57095L said:

Last time I tried to compliment someone, my "you don't sweat much for a fat girl" didn't go over as expected.  

 

I know the feeling.

My compliment was..... "are you sparkling or is that a lot of sweat".

 

Another one that is usually received with a nasty glare is...... "Are you eating ANOTHER bag of chips"?

 

 

..........Widder

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

How about when they have 5" fingernails? I always say, "I see you don't play piano or guitar huh?" That always gets a blank stare! :lol:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

58 minutes ago, Rye Miles #13621 said:

How about when they have 5" fingernails

The importance of reading carefully. I saw that as "when they have five fingernails", and thought, "ain't they supposed to have five fingernails?"

 

Oohhh, five INCH fingernails. Yeah, that does make a difference.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

As my company grew and grew we ended up hiring a Human Resources person. We thought for negotiating health insurance etc. We were wrong. The primary goal is to suck the fun out of the company. We got lectures on making a compliment to someone could be construed as sexual harassment! Especially from management to an employee.

Unfortunate because when someone needed or appreciated a compliment we dodged it.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I’ve gotten myself into serious trouble a couple of times for complements paid to pretty nurses while regaining my senses in the recovery room after surgery!!  :rolleyes: :o :lol:
 

edit:  I should add that I’ve also received some exemplary treatment as a result of some of those complements! ;)

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I remember the flip side:
Many years ago, I will still working in downtown San Francisco.
One fine morning, some gentleman held the door open for a young woman wearing her tennies and carrying her work high heels.

She gave this poor soul her entire doctoral dissertation in both Truck Driver and Sailor language skills.
She was breathtakingly vile.
I suspect this is common today with the lesbian and pronoun-impaired crowds here... which I avoid like the plague they are.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.