Automotive Repair

[Subdeacon Joe]

What could go wrong?

 

 

[Linn Keller, SASS 27332, BOLD 103]

Oh dear God I am HOWLING!!!
My friend, thank you, I needed that laugh!

[Blackwater 53393]

‘Til you’re looking at a fuel line patched with electrical tape…

[PowderRiverCowboy]

Building Cars for year you wouldnt believe the crap I have seen those are mild . Love the Guys that grow a beard to prove they are a man but have wiper blades installed by the girl at Autozone 

[Subdeacon Joe]

[Alpo]

57 minutes ago, PowerRiverCowboy said:

Building Cars for year you wouldnt believe the crap I have seen those are mild . Love the Guys that grow a beard to prove they are a man but have wiper blades installed by the girl at Autozone 

I don't understand that. I've seen variations of that statement many times, but I don't understand what it has to do with masculinity.

 

I have replaced the windshield wiper inserts - the rubber piece - on every car I've driven since I started driving in 1971. I have never replaced a windshield wiper blade - the whole metal thingy.

 

It is getting harder and harder to find some place that will sell the insert, and I'm sure that soon I will have to spend $12 to $15 for a blade instead of $2 for an insert. And when I do, I'm damn sure going to have somebody that knows what they're doing replace it. Because I've never done it. I've been screwing with cars for 50 years, but I've never replaced one.

 

I've also never rebuilt a differential. Maybe that makes me less masculine. I don't know how to rebuild a differential.

[Pat Riot]

2 hours ago, Alpo said:

It is getting harder and harder to find some place that will sell the insert

You are lucky you can find the inserts without the blades. When I saw that inserts were no longer available I thought it was because the companies selling them were trying to make more money. Once I was at an O’Reilly’s an there were a couple of guys there from their corporate offices. I approached them and asked about the wiper blades as well as a couple of other things I can’t remember now. 
They explained that the reason for now selling complete wiper blades was people never changed the blades, but did replace inserts. Over time the blades weaken and do not put the proper pressure on the insert to clear the windshield as designed. They said the blade manufacturers were afraid of liabilities or lawsuits that might occur if someone had an accident and blamed inadequate wiper blade operation as the reason for the accident. 
 

I don’t like the fact that now I have to pay 3 or 4 times what I used to in order to have good working windshield wipers, but I do understand why they did this. 
 

Also, I have found that replacing the entire blade is much easier than changing the inserts. Give it a try. It’s easy once you figure it out. 

[Creeker, SASS #43022]

7 hours ago, Subdeacon Joe said:

What could go wrong?

 

 

Picture 1. 

All "good" mechanics know to cut the brake line - install and tighten with a deepwell socket wrench and then use a length of line with compression fittings to finish - that's a pro tip (don't tell everyone).

 

Picture 2.

Have actually seen that one happen when I managed an auto parts store.  Tho in fairness - it was dark and raining and the "tab" was not prominent.

Customer installed and then came back in to complain.

A few of us stood in the parking lot in the rain with flashlights tugging the cables, "it's tight" until somebody got the idea to check voltage on the battery and the stick probe went zero, zip, none and it dawned on us.

 

As for wipers - I can change both blades in less than 3 minutes total (including opening packagrs, wiping down the rubber with the alcohol wipe and discarding trash).

 

And quality aftermarket blades are better than what came oem on your car.

 

Replacing inserts is a giant pain and doing yourself a disservice.

[Rye Miles #13621]

16 hours ago, Alpo said:

I don't understand that. I've seen variations of that statement many times, but I don't understand what it has to do with masculinity.

 

I have replaced the windshield wiper inserts - the rubber piece - on every car I've driven since I started driving in 1971. I have never replaced a windshield wiper blade - the whole metal thingy.

 

It is getting harder and harder to find some place that will sell the insert, and I'm sure that soon I will have to spend $12 to $15 for a blade instead of $2 for an insert. And when I do, I'm damn sure going to have somebody that knows what they're doing replace it. Because I've never done it. I've been screwing with cars for 50 years, but I've never replaced one.

 

I've also never rebuilt a differential. Maybe that makes me less masculine. I don't know how to rebuild a differential.

I grew a beard because I could! My sister couldn't! I haven't done work on a car in 50 years! I never did a lot, just me and a couple buddies trying to save a few bucks! Oil changes, brakes, I rebuilt a carburetor once and messed it up! I guess I'm not masculine either! 

[Three Foot Johnson]

Some 40+ years ago, my hunting buddy and me were driving around the Elkhorn mountains in my '75 GMC looking for a good spot to hunt. I don't remember just why, but the alignment pins on the one of the rear leaf springs got sheared off, and the rear end/axle assembly slid back against the fender well far enough that the driveline actually came apart. We spent a couple hours crawling around in the snow and finally got it back together and the axle back to where it belonged with a Hi-Lift jack. I had a hundred foot length of clothesline rope behind the seat and we looped it around the axle housing and forward to a frame crossmember again and again and again until we ran out of rope. I drove it out of the mountains and thirty miles home that way. About halfway back, my buddy glanced at the speedometer and reminded me the rear end was being held in place with just a length of quarter inch cotton rope. I slowed down. 

[Creeker, SASS #43022]

36 minutes ago, Three Foot Johnson said:

Some 40+ years ago, my hunting buddy and me were driving around the Elkhorn mountains in my '75 GMC looking for a good spot to hunt. I don't remember just why, but the alignment pins on the one of the rear leaf springs got sheared off, and the rear end/axle assembly slid back against the fender well far enough that the driveline actually came apart. We spent a couple hours crawling around in the snow and finally got it back together and the axle back to where it belonged with a Hi-Lift jack. I had a hundred foot length of clothesline rope behind the seat and we looped it around the axle housing and forward to a frame crossmember again and again and again until we ran out of rope. I drove it out of the mountains and thirty miles home that way. About halfway back, my buddy glanced at the speedometer and reminded me the rear end was being held in place with just a length of quarter inch cotton rope. I slowed down. 

Visegrip pliers, Duct tape, baling wire and WD40.

You can do amazing things with enough desperation and imagination.

 

[Subdeacon Joe]

42 minutes ago, Three Foot Johnson said:

Some 40+ years ago, my hunting buddy and me were driving around the Elkhorn mountains in my '75 GMC looking for a good spot to hunt. I don't remember just why, but the alignment pins on the one of the rear leaf springs got sheared off, and the rear end/axle assembly slid back against the fender well far enough that the driveline actually came apart. We spent a couple hours crawling around in the snow and finally got it back together and the axle back to where it belonged with a Hi-Lift jack. I had a hundred foot length of clothesline rope behind the seat and we looped it around the axle housing and forward to a frame crossmember again and again and again until we ran out of rope. I drove it out of the mountains and thirty miles home that way. About halfway back, my buddy glanced at the speedometer and reminded me the rear end was being held in place with just a length of quarter inch cotton rope. I slowed down. 

 

Field repairs just good enough to get you to where you can make real repairs.

[bgavin]

On 8/13/2022 at 12:59 PM, Alpo said:

I've also never rebuilt a differential. Maybe that makes me less masculine. I don't know how to rebuild a differential.

Those were my specialty when I was a factory wrench for Toyota.

There was a gas station down the street using an impact gun to tighten the pinion shaft nut...
This over tightened the crush sleeve and allowed the pinion to seat too deeply into the ring gear, eventually destroying it.

It got so bad, our shop had rebuilt cores on the shelf.
Customer got towed in... pull the axels, swap the assembly, charge for a full rebuild and out the door.
Rebuild the spare on the bench while waiting for the next victim to arrive.

[Creeker, SASS #43022]

7 minutes ago, Subdeacon Joe said:

 

Field repairs just good enough to get you to where you can make real repairs.

Thing is - sometimes the field repair holds up so well; we never get around to fixing it right. 

I have had more than one car with baling wire and wormgear hose clamp exhaust hangers.

[Three Foot Johnson]

Back in 1980-something, I bought a cheap '76 Toyota SR5 pickup as a utility vehicle around the place that had damage from a light roll over, with the passenger door and right side of the box caved in a bit here and there, but the door & window still worked fine. The right forward corner of the cab had also been crushed down just enough to smash the windshield. Looking around the boneyard, I found a Ford Courier with a good windshield, pulled it, welded some tabs into the Toyota windshield frame to hold it securely, filled in the gap with a can of Great Stuff expanding foam, and drove it for several more years before scrapping it.

[Eyesa Horg]

Ellie got her Camaro home back in the 70's when the fan belt left the vehicle. She tied her panty hose around the crank and water pump pulley. Made it the 25 miles home! You'd be hard pressed to do that with today's cars.

[DocWard]

On 8/13/2022 at 2:58 PM, PowerRiverCowboy said:

Love the Guys that grow a beard to prove they are a man but have wiper blades installed by the girl at Autozone 

 

There are a bunch of those guys around, to be sure. They also tend to drink IPAs and coffee concoctions with ingredients I don't understand.

For the record, I've brought a '77 Jeep Cherokee that I sank back from the dead with the help of my four-wheeling friends (they were with me when we submerged it, they darn sure better have helped). I've worked with my brother to replace a transmission and transfer case in a '78 Bronco on the street in front of his house while the rain caused a stream to run under us. I've replaced jets on Holley carbs, and laid under a dash with my feet in the seat trying to run down someone else's wiring messes more times than I care to remember. I could go on and on. I sometimes wear a goatee, sometimes I don't. I'm confident in my masculinity and my Motor Vehicle Man Card Holding Status. If the people at Autozone offer to replace wipers, batteries or anything else for me for free, I'm more than happy to let them earn their pay, and I will thank them when they are done.

As an aside, I think Mrs. Doc's exact words when she first saw my old Cherokee was something along the lines of:
 

 

[Subdeacon Joe]

49 minutes ago, Eyesa Horg said:

Ellie got her Camaro home back in the 70's when the fan belt left the vehicle. She tied her panty hose around the crank and water pump pulley. Made it the 25 miles home! You'd be hard pressed to do that with today's cars.

 

One time the alternator adjustment bolt on my '72 Chevy Vega broke while I was driving.  No idea how.  

I managed to get into a parking lot before it died.  I had some scrap lath in the back. Used pieces of that to wedge the alternator out and get tension on the belt.  Used pantyhose that my girlfriend had left in the car to lash the lath in tight, got a jump from someone and was able to drive home.

 

I was all set to fight with an EZout to get the broken bolt out but when the drill started to bight it just spun it out the back.  Easy fix.

[McCandless]

On 8/13/2022 at 2:55 PM, Blackwater 53393 said:

‘Til you’re looking at a fuel line patched with electrical tape…

 

I'm going to have to do a fuel line fix on my old truck tomorrow.  Fortunately, it is an old truck and I can still find things and get my hands on 'em.  These new ones where you have to remove parts and assemblies just to replace a headlight bulb are a pain!

[largo casey #19191]

Back in the 60's & 70's  some of the things we would see come in off the Rez was amazing..Baling wire Barb wire & inner tubes holding them together.

                                                                                                                                                                                  Largo

[Cypress Sun]

 

I was in a NAPA auto parts store a few years back buying a thermostat for my gals Toyota Camry. While waiting for them to find it, I was looking at the stuff on the rotating rack near the register.

All kinds of gimmick kind of stuff on the rack. I noticed a blister pack roll of black tie wire, probably about 10' long when it is rolled out. I was kind of laughing about the roll and reminiscing about the times I used the wire, both professionally at work and not so professionally on cars/lawn mowers and the like. As I put the wire back on the rack, the guy came back with the thermostat and said "You wouldn't believe how much of that wire we sell a week." He told me that he has to fill it twice a week. If I remember right, the 10' roll was $8 + tax. Back then, 100' rolls of the exact same stuff from a supply house was about $9 each.

 

 

There were times in my life that my vehicles were REAL heaps. I've had more than one auto that I couldn't wear a shoe on my right foot so I could curl my toes around the back of the brake pedal to bring it back up quicker so I could pump it up faster. I can't image doing that with todays vehicles.

 

I try to keep duct tape, tie wire, long zip ties and a few bungie cords in my vehicle at all times...just in case.

[bgavin]

I blew a hose in my 1961 Econoline van on HW95 between Winnemucca and Reno.
Wrapped the hose with electrical tape, left the radiator cap loose, and emptied my cooler into the radiator.
Limped into Reno for repairs.

1977 Chevy HEI burned a hole in the distributor rotor between Boise and Idaho City.
My father-in-law was with us... said "Uh oh... I know what that is"... apparently a common problem at 50k miles.
More tape, more limping into Boise to the GM dealer for new parts.

Same 1961 Econolline blew yet another regulator/generator outside of Jordan Valley, OR.
I was young and broke...
Dad was still flying at that time, put a $100 bill into a capped section of galvanized pipe, flew over JV and threw it out the window for me.
It was enough to buy yet another generator/regulator.

The FORD acronym was so well deserved with that old van.

[Buckshot Bob]

On 8/13/2022 at 2:55 PM, Blackwater 53393 said:

‘Til you’re looking at a fuel line patched with electrical tape…

Red Green would’ve used duct tape

[Injun Ryder, SASS #36201L]

One of the more humorous "roadside" fixes I had to do concerned my Harley. I just gassed up a couple of miles from home and started the engine. It backfired and blew the carburetor off the side of the motor! The bolts were broken and the carb was hanging by cables and hoses. I put the carb back in the correct position, placed my knee on the air cleaner to hold the carb in place, started the motor and made it home. 

[Eyesa Horg]

Used cigarette pack foil for a fuse on a BSA and used it with a small piece of wood to help seal a head gasket on a Triumph! Gottem both home

[bgavin]

12 hours ago, Injun Ryder, SASS #36201L said:

One of the more humorous "roadside" fixes I had to do concerned my Harley. I just gassed up a couple of miles from home and started the engine. It backfired and blew the carburetor off the side of the motor! The bolts were broken and the carb was hanging by cables and hoses. I put the carb back in the correct position, placed my knee on the air cleaner to hold the carb in place, started the motor and made it home. 

I loved the old Harleys.
Roadside fix of setting the points was using a dime.
Don't have a dime, two nickels works just as well...

[Eyesa Horg]

1 minute ago, bgavin said:

I loved the old Harleys.
Roadside fix of setting the points was using a dime.
Don't have a dime, two nickels works just as well...

And a set of Chevy points would get ya back!

[DocWard]

22 hours ago, Subdeacon Joe said:

I was all set to fight with an EZout to get the broken bolt out

 

If ever there was a misnomer. 

[John Kloehr]

On 8/14/2022 at 4:57 PM, Three Foot Johnson said:

... '75 GMC ... alignment pins on the one of the rear leaf springs got sheared off, and the rear end/axle assembly slid back

No idea how you did that, but I do know that if it is the first nice day of spring and fire up a '70 Chevy truck and it needs the carbon blown out and if floored when getting on a highway onramp and the engine catches and the manual transmission is then slap shifted at redline under full throttle, the rear end/axle assembly can shear the pin and move forward putting the 32" All Terrain driver's side tire within less than an inch of the bed side wheel opening.

 

Rebuilding the spring packs was going to take at least two weeks. Could not buy just a pin, so I chucked a grade 8 bolt in a lathe and rounded the hex head to match the remains of my pin. Bolted everything back together.

 

Then there was the time I almost bought a rusted out '65 Buick for $300, I started adding up the cost of all the Vice Grip pliers holding various parts together and it was close to break-even in value.

[Muggle]

[Hardpan Curmudgeon SASS #8967]

For a few years I drove a '74 Fiat 124 Spider.  All jokes aside, it was a total blast to drive, and mechanically very straightforward.  However, as with any vehicle, it did have a quirk or two - one of which was the electric fuel pump.  The pump was mounted inside the trunk, in the spare tire well.  For some reason - possibly heat - the things would last 20+ thousand miles then quit.  No problem... I eventually learned to keep a spare on board. 

 

Driving to work in San Ramon one morning the danged pump decided to go tango uniform... right in the middle of the Bay Bridge.  

 

Rats!

 

I pulled over to the far right.  In those pre-cell phone days, you were expected to hike to the nearest "emergency phone" station on the bridge and call for help.  Eventually, a truck would show up and drag you off the bridge.  Under NO circumstances were you supposed to change a tire or anything else mechanical yourself on that bridge.

 

Took me less than five minutes to swap out that pump and be on my way!  

 

Another time - lunch break, and I'd driven from San Ramon to Pleasanton on some errand or t'other.  Headed back to the office, just whipping up the on-ramp when the pump died.  

 

Rats!

 

But I managed to safely coast to the side - right behind a Highway Patrol car, sitting idling while the CHP officer wrote a ticket for some fella.  

 

He looked up, startled, and walked back to my car.  Looked down at me (top was lowered) sitting there in a sport coat and tie and asked what the Hell was I doing??

 

I explained, he was astonished, then said he'd call me a tow truck as soon as he finished.  He did.

 

Triple-A driver shows up and askes what garage I wanted to be towed to.  I said, "just take me to the nearest NAPA store!"

 

Fella argued with me; I insisted, and he finally towed the car to the nearest NAPA store.  And admonished me for being foolish ~ he would NOT come back to tow me to a shop!

 

No prob....

 

Into the NAPA store I went, marched up to the counter, and asked for a fuel pump.
 

"You're outta luck, Dude!  We don't sell fuel pumps for them foreign jobs!"

 

Well... just give me any generic electric fuel pump, I requested.  It'll work.

 

"No!  We only have AMERICAN pumps - they WILL NOT work in that car!"

 

I argued with 'em for about fifteen minutes or so, until one of 'em finally relented and sold me a 12-volt AC Delco pump - "And we ain't gonna let you return it when it don't work - and it ain't gonna work!  You'll see!"

 

I walked out with pump in hand.  They followed me outside the door, and stood there laughing at me.  Five minutes later, with a grin and a wave, I drove outta their parking lot under their astonished stares.

 

Dummies!  

 

       

[Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062]

On 8/15/2022 at 9:48 AM, Subdeacon Joe said:

 

I was all set to fight with an EZout to get the broken bolt out but when the drill started to bight it just spun it out the back.  Easy fix.

 

10 hours ago, DocWard said:

 

If ever there was a misnomer. 

 

 

Yep ........EZouts ..... mostly aren't .....   

[Eyesa Horg]

4 hours ago, Wallaby Jack, SASS #44062 said:

 

 

 

Yep ........EZouts ..... mostly aren't .....   

My experience has been if the bolt broke with a wrench, the EZ out is going to as well. Now it's torch time!

[Hardpan Curmudgeon SASS #8967]

2 hours ago, Eyesa Horg said:

My experience has been if the bolt broke with a wrench, the EZ out is going to as well. Now it's torch time!

 

Yup... in these parts we call that the "Victor Wrench."   

[Eyesa Horg]

23 minutes ago, Hardpan Curmudgeon SASS #8967 said:

 

Yup... in these parts we call that the "Victor Wrench."   

Or the "Hot Wrench"