Acme Bullets

[Whiskey Hicks]

I just ordered a shipment of 500 coated .45 Colt, 255 gr SWC bullets for $70.

 

How are your experiences with their product?

[Smuteye John SASS#24774]

Haven't personally tried any of their products but I hear they make some very nice anvils.

 

 

[Alpo]

I didn't know they made bullets. I knew they made rockets.

[Rye Miles #13621]

I just ordered some .375 round balls from them. It's my first time, they seem easy to deal with!

[Bingo Montana]

Yes, I just bought and tried out some of the 38 105 FP-NLG bullets.  They shot well, happy customer.

[Pat Riot]

Now see…I saw Whiskey’s post and started to post this, but thought “No, he’s seriously asking a question. Just leave it alone.”

 

 

I am so glad I am not the only nut in here…

 

Sorry Whiskey Hicks. I have no experience with Acme Bullets…but I do have their catalog. 

[Injun Ryder, SASS #36201L]

Looks like there might be some litigation going on:

 

In The United States District Court 
Southwestern District, Tempe, Arizona 
 
The Honorable Homer Simpson, Presiding 
 
Wile E. Coyote,   ) 
 Plaintiff        ) 
v.                )     Case No. B19293 
Acme Company,     ) 
 Defendant        ) 
------------------ 
 
Opening statement of Mr. Ralf Rinkle, attorney for Mr. Coyote: 
 
My client, Mr. Wile E. Coyote, a resident of Arizona and contiguous 
states, does hereby bring suit for damages against the Acme Company, 
manufacturer and retail distributor of assorted merchandise, 
incorporated in Delaware and doing business in every state, district, 
and territory.  Mr. Coyote seeks compensation for personal injuries, 
loss of business income, and mental suffering caused as a direct result 
of the actions and/or gross negligence of said company, under Title 15 
of the United States Code, Chapter 47, section 2072, subsection (a), 
relating to product liability. 
 
Mr. Coyote states that on eighty-five separate occasions he has 
purchased of the Acme Company (hereinafter, "Defendant"), through that 
company`s mail-order department, certain products which did cause him 
bodily injury due to defects in manufacture or improper cautionary 
labeling.  Sales slips made out to Mr. Coyote as proof of purchase are 
at present in the possession of the Court, marked Exhibit A.  Such 
injuries sustained by Mr. Coyote have temporarily restricted his ability 
to make a living in his profession of predator.  Mr. Coyote is self-
employed and thus not eligible for Workmen`s Compensation. 
 
Mr. Coyote states that on December 13th he received of Defendant via 
parcel post one Acme Rocket Sled.  The intention of Mr. Coyote was to 
use the Rocket sled to aid him in pursuit of his prey.  Upon receipt of 
the Rocket Sled Mr. Coyote removed it from its wooden shipping crate and 
sighting his prey in the distance, activated the ignition.  As Mr. 
Coyote gripped thehandlebars, the Rocket Sled accelerated with such 
sudden and precipitate force as to stretch Mr. Coyote`s forelimbs to a 
length of fifty feet.  Subsequently, the rest of Mr. Coyote`s body shot 
forward with a violent jolt, causing severe strain to his back and neck 
and placing him unexpectedly astride the Rocket Sled.  Disappearing over 
the horizon at such speed as to leave a 
diminishing jet trail along its path, the Rocket Sled soon brought Mr. 
Coyote abreast of his prey.  At that moment the animal he was pursuing 
veered sharply to the right.  Mr. Coyote vigorously attempted to follow 
this maneuver but was unable to, due to poorly designed steering on the 
Rocket Sled and a faulty or nonexistent braking system.  Shortly 
thereafter, the unchecked  progress of the Rocket Sled brought it and 
Mr. Coyote into collision with the side of a mesa. 
 
Paragraph One of the Report of Attending Physician (Exhibit B), prepared 
by Dr. Ernest Grosscup, M.D., D.O., details the multiple fractures, 
contusions, and tissue damage suffered by Mr. Coyote as a result of this 
collision.  Repair of the injuries required a full bandage around the 
head (excluding the ears), a neck brace, and full or partial casts on 
all four legs. 
 
Hampered by these injuries, Mr. Coyote was nevertheless obliged to 
support himself.  With this in mind, he purchased of Defendant as an aid 
to mobility one pair of Acme Rocket Skates.  When he attempted to use 
this product, however, he became involved in an accident remarkably 
similar to that which occurred with the Rocket Sled.  Again, Defendant 
sold over the counter, without caveat, a product which attached powerful 
jet engines (in this case, two) to inadequate vehicles, with little or 
no provision for passenger safety.  Encumbered by his heavy casts, Mr. 
Coyote lost control of the Rocket Skates soon after strapping them on, 
and collided with a roadside billboard so violently as to leave a hole 
in the shape of his full silhouette. 
 
Mr. Coyote states that on occasions too numerous to list in this 
document he has suffered mishaps with explosives purchased of Defendant: 
the Acme "Little Giant" Firecracker, the Acme Self-Guided Aerial Bomb, 
etc. (For a full listing, see the Acme Mail Order Explosives Catalogue 
and attached deposition, entered in evidence as Exhibit C.)   Indeed, it 
is safe to say that not once has an explosive purchased of Defendant by 
Mr. Coyote performed in an expected manner.
 
To cite just one example: At the expense of much time and personal 
effort, Mr. Coyote constructed around the outer rim of a butte a wooden 
trough beginning at the top of the butte and spiraling downward around 
it to some few feet above a black X painted on the desert floor.  The 
trough was designed in such a way that a spherical explosive of the type 
sold by Defendant would roll easily and swiftly down to the point of 
detonation indicated by the X.  Mr. Coyote placed a generous pile of 
birdseed directly on the X, and then, carrying the spherical Acme Bomb 
(Catalogue #78-832), climbed to the top of the butte.   Mr. Coyote`s 
prey, seeing the birdseed, approached, and Mr. Coyote proceeded to light 
the fuse.   In an instant, the fuse burned down to the stem, causing the 
bomb to detonate. 
 
In addition to reducing all Mr. Coyote`s careful preparations to naught, 
the premature detonation of Defendant`s product resulted in the 
following disfigurements to Mr. Coyote: 
 
  1.  Severe singeing of the hair on the head, neck, and muzzle. 
  2.  Sooty discoloration. 
  3.  Fracture of the left ear at the stem, causing the ear to dangle in 
the after shock with a creaking noise. 
  4.  Full or partial combustion of whiskers, producing kinking, 
frazzling, and ashy disintegration. 
  5.  Radical widening of the eyes, due to brow and lid charring. 
 
We come now to the Acme Spring-Powered Shoes.  The remains of a pair of 
these purchased by Mr. Coyote on June 23rd are Plaintiff`s Exhibit D.  
Selected fragments have been shipped to the metallurgical laboratories 
of the University of California at Santa Barbara for analysis, but to 
date, no explanation has been found for this product`s sudden and 
extreme malfunction. 
 
As advertised by Defendant, this product is simplicity itself: two wood-
and-metal sandals, each attached to milled-steel springs of high tensile 
strength and compressed in a tightly coiled position by a cocking device 
with a lanyard release.  Mr. Coyote believed that this product would 
enable him to pounce upon his prey in the initial moments of the chase, 
when swift reflexes are at a premium. 
 
To increase the shoes' thrusting power still further, Mr. Coyote affixed 
them by their bottoms to the side of a large boulder.  Adjacent to the 
boulder was a path which Mr. Coyote`s prey was known to frequent.  Mr. 
Coyote put his hind feet in the wood-and-metal sandals and crouched in 
readiness, his right forepaw holding firmly to the lanyard release.  
Within a short time Mr. Coyote`s prey did indeed appear on the path 
coming toward him.  Unsuspecting, the prey stopped near Mr. Coyote, well 
within range of the springs at full extension.  Mr. Coyote gauged the 
distance with care and proceeded to pull the lanyard release. 
 
At this point, Defendant`s product should have thrust Mr. Coyote forward 
and away from the boulder.  Instead, for reasons yet unknown, the Acme 
Spring-Powered Shoes thrust the boulder away from Mr. Coyote.  As the 
intended prey looked on unharmed, Mr. Coyote hung suspended in air.  
Then the twin springs recoiled, bringing Mr. Coyote to a violent feet-
first collision with the boulder, the full weight of his head and 
forequarters falling upon his extremities. 
 
The force of this impact then caused the springs to rebound, whereupon 
Mr. Coyote was thrust skyward.  A second recoil and collision followed.  
The boulder, meanwhile, which was roughly ovoid in shape, had begun to 
bounce down a hillside, the coiling and recoiling of the springs adding 
to its velocity.  At each bounce, Mr. Coyote cam into contact with the 
boulder, or the boulder cam into contact with Mr. Coyote, or both came 
into contact with the ground.  As the grade was a long one, this process 
continued for sometime. 
 
The sequence of collisions resulted in systemic physical damage to Mr. 
Coyote, viz., flattening of the cranium, sideways displacement of the 
tongue, reduction of length of legs and upper body, and compression of 
vertebrae from base of tail to head.  Repetition of blows along a 
vertical axis produced a series of regular horizontal folds in Mr. 
Coyote`s body tissues--a rare and painful condition which caused Mr. 
Coyote to expand upward and contract downward alternately as he walked, 
and to emit an off-key, accordion-like wheezing with every step.  The 
distracting and embarrassing nature of this symptom has been a major 
impediment to Mr. Coyote`s pursuit of a normal social life. 
 
As the court is no doubt aware, Defendant has a virtual monopoly of 
manufacture and sale of goods required by Mr. Coyote's work.  It is our 
contention that Defendant has used its market advantage to the detriment 
of the consumer of such specialized products as itching powder, giant 
kites, Burmese tiger traps, anvils, and two-hundred-foot-long rubber 
bands.  Much as he has come to mistrust Defendant's products, Mr. Coyote 
has no other domestic source of supply to which to turn.  One can only 
wonder what our trading partners in Western Europe and Japan would make 
of such a situation, where a giant company is allowed to victimize the 
consumer in the most reckless and wrongful manner over and over again. 
 
Mr. Coyote respectfully requests that the Court regard these larger 
economic implications and assess punitive damages in the amount of 
seventeen million dollars.  In addition, Mr. Coyote seeks actual damages 
(missed meals, medical expenses, days lost from professional occupation) 
of one million dollars; general damages (mental suffering, injury to 
reputation) of twenty million dollars; and attorney's fees of seven 
hundred and fifty thousand dollars.  By awarding Mr. Coyote the full 
amount, this Court will censure Defendant, its directors, officers, 
shareholders, successors, and assigns, in the only language they 
understand, and reaffirm the right of the individual predator to equal 
protection under the law. 

 

*********

 

To: "'staff@lectlaw.com'"  
Subject: Wile E. Coyote v. Acme Company 
Date: Thu, 28 Sep 1995 17:26:15 -0400 
Return-Receipt-To:  
 
Attached is the defendant's Opening Statement in the above-referenced 
matter.  Please post to the Rubber Room, as default judgment against 
defendant would be an injustice. 
 
Thank you for your attention to this matter.
=====================================================
 
In the United States District Court 
Southwestern District, Tempe, Arizona 
 
The Honorable Homer Simpson, Presiding 
 
Wile E. Coyote,    ) 
 Plaintiff        ) 
v.            )        Case No. B19293 
Acme Company,    ) 
 Defendant        ) 
------------------ 
 
Opening Statement of Nicholas J. McSlick of Fairweather, Winters, and 
Summers, Attorney for Acme Company: 
 
The plaintiff, Coyote, has filed a lawsuit against, my client, the 
Acme Company sounding in tort for products liability alleging that 
Acme Co., was negligent, reckless, and placed products into the stream 
of commerce through its mail order catalogues.  Coyote also alleges 
strict products liability, breach of warranty, breach of warranty of 
merchantability, and that the products were not fit for their intended 
use.  Coyote seeks the outrageous sum of twenty one million seven 
hundred fifty thousand dollars for general compensatory damages and 
attorneys fees, and  an additional seventeen million dollars in 
punitive or exemplary damages alleging Acme acted in reckless 
disregard for plaintiff's safety. 
 
We shall prove and we shall show to your satisfaction that the 
plaintiff cannot meet his burden of proof and that ACME Company made 
its products as safe as possible in keeping with the state of the art 
of technology when said products were placed into the stream of 
commerce. 
 
Moreover, the evidence will show that the plaintiff assumed known 
risks associated with the use of the products he ordered; he also 
failed to heed printed warnings; he intentionally misused said 
products; and he made substantial charges to the design and character 
of the products as to void all warranties and absolving Acme of all 
civil liability. 
 
Plaintiff, during many of his alleged injury incidents as mentioned in 
his petition was also contributorily negligent and his negligence far 
exceeded any negligence on the part of Acme Company. 
 
Furthermore, we will show by a preponderance of the evidence that 
plaintiff Coyote is a malingerer and a fraud and at no time has he 
ever sustained any permanent injury whatsoever. 
 
Although, Coyote represents himself as a self-employed-professional, 
to wit:  a predator, we will prove through films done by Warner Bros. 
that Wile E. Coyote is a rich, playboy, cartoon star/actor.  We will 
view videotaped footage wherein the Coyote after suffering seemingly 
horrendous, grotesque, debilitating and life threatening injuries, is 
seen no more than 30 seconds later totally uninjured and unscathed. 
 
We had Mr. Coyote examined by an independent medical doctor, one Dr. 
S. Brandon Quackmeister, who will testify that none of the plaintiff's 
claimed injuries are permanent.  Coyote has not had any residual pain 
symptoms since that alleged incidents. 
 
In truth and in fact, ladies and gentlemen, the claims of the 
plaintiff Mr. Wile E. Coyote are nothing more than wishful thinking 
and, in brief, figments of his imagination. 
 
Let's look at the cold, hard evidence, ladies and gentlemen. Coyote 
claims 85 separate occasions Acme products have caused him injury.  
His proof of defects is nothing more than sales slips from Acme.  He 
offers no expert testimony in this regard.  He cannot produce a 
physical engineer to cite one defect in Acme's products. 
 
He cites in particular the December 13 incident.  He does not mention 
the fact that this happened over 25 years ago--well past the 
applicable statute of limitations.  He failed to assemble the sled 
properly.  The exploded view assembly instructions show the torque 
values for all bolts in connection with the assembly of the sled.  The 
instructions and boldface red warnings on the instructions clearly 
state:  FAILURE TO TIGHTEN ALL BOLTS TO THE EXACT TORQUE VALUES MAY 
RESULT IN STEERING SYSTEM DIFFICULTY OR WHOLESALE FAILURE OF THE 
ENTIRE SYSTEM WHICH MAY RESULT IN SERIOUS BODILY INJURY OR DEATH.  DO 
NOT ATTEMPT TO USE A BOX WRENCH ON THE STEERING SYSTEM BOLTS.  Then in 
the fine print under the tools needed section it states, ACME TORQUE 
WRENCH MODEL #22100 or SEARS CRAFTSMAN MODEL DIAL OR CLICK TYPE. 
 
Post-crash examination of the sled remains reveal, that none of the 
bolts had the proper torque value and further that Coyote lost 
original parts and used his own replacement parts of the improper 
hardness which resulted in metal fatigue at various stress points, 
causing steering system failure.  His negligence exceeded any 
negligence on the part of Acme which Acme specifically denies. 
 
Despite the rocket sled incident and the claimed injuries, Coyote was 
seen 30 seconds later on the rocket skates which were purchased on the 
very same date as the rocket sled.  (See receipts in court file.) 
 
As for the incident with the skates, Coyote assumed a known risk 
attempting to pilot the skates while wearing plaster casts.  Any 
reasonable person would know that it would be impossible to maintain 
one's balance so encumbered--Coyote assumed the risk. 
 
In response to Coyote's claims of wrongdoing on the part of  ACME with 
respect to "mishaps with explosives" on occasions too numerous to 
list, again, Coyote failed to heed warnings and falsified documents in 
purchasing said explosives. 
 
The mail order form which accompanies the Explosive Catalog clearly 
states:  IN ORDER TO PURCHASE EXPLOSIVES FROM ACME YOU MUST HAVE A 
FEDERAL CLASS B EXPLOSIVE LICENSE AND ATTACH A FULL COPY TOGETHER WITH 
THE DRIVER'S LICENSE OF YOUR STATE OF RESIDENCE. 
 
The warnings also shipped with the mail order forms with respect to 
explosives state without equivocation:  ACME CLASS B EXPLOSIVE ARE 
INHERENTLY DANGEROUS.  THEY SHOULD ONLY BE USE BY TRAINED PERSONNEL.  
THEY SHOULD NEVER BE DETONATED OF IGNITED NEAR PEOPLE OR ANIMALS 
(EMPHASIS ADDED).  THE MANUFACTURER DISCLAIMS ALL CIVIL LIABILITY IN 
CONNECTION WITH IMPROPER, UNINTENDED OR ILLEGAL USE OF EXPLOSIVE 
DEVICES. 
 
Also, in boldface, red type it states:  FAILURE TO STORE "LITTLE 
GIANT" FIRECRACKER, SELF-GUIDED AERIAL BOMB AND OTHER EXPLOSIVES IN AN 
ADEQUATE MAGAZINE OR OTHER COOL, DRY AIR SPACE WILL RESULT IN THEIR 
DETERIORATION AND BREAKDOWN OF CHEMICAL PROPERTIES MAKING THEM 
EXTREMELY VOLATILE.  FAILURE TO HEED THIS WARNING MAY RESULT IN 
SERIOUS INJURY OR DEATH. 
 
First of all, Coyote procured all the devices with a falsified Class B 
explosives license.  In short, he made illegal purchases. 
 
Secondly, it was the plaintiff's habit or routine practice to 
haphazardly store the explosives in the open air--In Arizona, where 
the Court could take judicial notice of the fact that daytime 
temperatures exceed 100  F.  These explosives became volatile as 
warned and hence often exploding prematurely .  Furthermore, pursuit 
of his chosen prey with explosives was clearly excessive.  Perhaps, he 
could have purchased the ACME HAVE-A-HEART-LIVE-TRAP MODEL T-001-216 
which sells for a mere $29.95.  Instead, he recklessly disobeyed clear 
warnings to his own detriment.   
 
As far the Spring-Powered Shoes incident, Defendant admits that, in 
having experts review film footage of Coyote's usage, the experts 
cannot explain why the shoes did not propel him in the proper 
direction except that Plaintiff did not have adequate experience with 
the shoes before attempting to use them near rock formations.   
 
Furthermore, Coyote once again made alterations to the product, 
affixing them to a boulder, in contravention of the clear warning on 
the brochure included with his purchase, to wit: WARNING! SEVERE 
RECOIL. THIS PRODUCT IS INTENDED FOR PERSONAL PROPULSION ONLY. ATTACH 
ACME SPRING-POWERED SHOES ONLY TO FEET, AS DESCRIBED IN THE OWNER'S 
MANUAL, PAGE 3, PARAGRAPH (a)(2).  FAILURE TO FOLLOW OPERATING 
INSTRUCTIONS MAY RESULT IN SEVERE PERSONAL INJURY. 
 
Any injuries Mr. Coyote sustained are as a result of his negligent 
failure to follow the warnings and instructions provided.  In any 
event Coyote sustained no permanent injury therefrom. 
 
And in the final analysis, ladies and gentleman, as you are all 
probably aware and will see in the films, the Coyote has failed to 
heed the most important warning in fine print at the bottom of every 
brochure packed with Acme Products:  THIS PRODUCT IS NOT EFFECTIVE ON 
ROAD RUNNER! 
 
What is the Coyote's chosen prey during all these alleged incidents?  
Yes.  THE ROAD RUNNER.  I rest my case ladies and gentlemen. 
 
You must find for my client and bring back the only possible verdict 
in this case.  A verdict for the ACME COMPANY. 
 
Finally, I would respectfully ask the Court to dismiss Mr. Coyote's 
claim for punitive damages.  Coyote claims that Acme Company has a 
"virtual monopoly of manufacture and sale of goods required by [his] 
work."  This is no more than another case of wishful thinking on Mr. 
Coyote's part. Similar products are manufactured and sold through the 
mail by companies such as Apex Corporation, Zenith Manufacturing, and 
Perfect Predator Products, Inc.  One can only assume that Mr. Coyote's 
loyalty to Acme Company is the result of his satisfaction with the 
quality of the products and service provided by Acme over the years.  
It is that same quality that has made Acme the largest retailer of 
predator related products in the US.   
 
The occupation of predator is high risk profession, and a large 
percentage of such businesses fail each year.  Mr. Coyote does not 
wish to be compensated for any alleged negligence of Acme Company.  
Instead, he seeks to be rewarded for his own negligence and 
ineptitude.   
 
THANK YOU, YOUR HONOR, AND THANK YOU, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. 

 

[Patagonia Pete]

I ordered some 45 - 200gr from them in the past ...

I was in a bind but needed bullets ... as they are a bit more expensive than the coated I usually purchase.

However ... they were very nice (red coated) and came in an interesting "interlocking wooden box" (which I now use to hold my snap caps).

Grafs & Sons also sells their bullets (and just checking I see most are out of stock but their product images still show the wooden box) ...

 

   

[Chuck Steak]

I've had good results with them.  Loaded a bunch of their 38/125 bullets and have been quite satisfied.

[Horace Patootie, SASS #35798]

I bought two boxes of 405 grain bullets from them. All good and love those boxes.

Horace

[Utah Bob #35998]

I use their instant holes for my garbage.

[Patagonia Pete]

1 hour ago, Utah Bob #35998 said:

I use their instant holes for my garbage.

??What does that mean?? What is an instant hole??

[Texas Joker]

ACME: A Company that Makes Everything.

[Chuck Steak]

1 hour ago, Patagonia Pete said:

??What does that mean?? What is an instant hole??

 

[Patagonia Pete]

1 minute ago, Chuck Steak said:

 

Oh ... OK ... I think ... thks ... 

[Alpo]

In Dungeons & Dragons, those were called portable holes. Just take it out of your pack and unfold it and lay it on the ground, and you had a hole. When you no longer needed it you picked it up and folded it up and put it back in your pack.

[Patagonia Pete]

14 minutes ago, Alpo said:

In Dungeons & Dragons, those were called portable holes. Just take it out of your pack and unfold it and lay it on the ground, and you had a hole. When you no longer needed it you picked it up and folded it up and put it back in your pack.

My bad ... I was thinking of bullets and wasn't paying enough attention to the off topic stuff .. 

[Ramblin Gambler]

2 minutes ago, Patagonia Pete said:

My bad ... I was thinking of bullets and wasn't paying enough attention to the off topic stuff .. 

 

Just don't let it happen again. 

 

[Alpo]

G