DocWard Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 The past year and a half have been a challenge for Mrs. Doc and me. Late July of '19 saw her with a crush injury of Mrs. Doc's toe, resulting in her dealing with "Complex Regional Pain Syndrome" (CRPS), which may be a problem for life. She's had to get continual nerve injections for it on multiple occasions this year that require sedation and leave her sore. Mere months later she said her final goodbye to her mom. She was named the executor of the estate, and had that burden. Prior to being shut down, she had struggled with changes made where she teaches that to outside observers have seemed nonsensical at best, malicious at worst, and have often times created more walking for her (remember the CRPS?) than other teachers in the system, or forced her to need to walk faster (Again, CRPS), to have be where she needs to be in a timely fashion. She has those same problems to look forward if things reopen after the first of the year. Since the middle of September, I've lost two close friends from college to heart conditions in their early fifties. Another friend and a fraternity brother to suicide, the fraternity brother right after his wife passed to liver failure. While I wasn't particularly close to him, it has truly shaken other fraternity brothers I am very close to. In fact, each and every one of them were connected to my fraternity in some way, if not actual members. Through it all, Mrs. Doc has struggled to do what is necessary so she could continue with her one true passion, showing her horse at Quarter Horse shows. This afternoon, he was rushed to OSU's Veterinary Hospital for emergency surgery, and after they found the problem, she had to make the hard decision to have her horse, her friend, show companion and pet of over a decade, put down. So, if it wouldn't be too much, keep us both, especially my wife and the love of my life, in your thoughts. I worry for her more than myself, but I admit I am struggling right now, despite a lot of positive possibilities for my future. For those given to prayer, most here know we're not, but we are appreciative of those who choose to on our behalf and the positive energy it gives. I'm going to call it a night, and try to console her a bit more, and try to get some rest. Peace, everyone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J-BAR #18287 Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 No words, just sincere sympathy. Deep breath, hang in there my friend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeaconKC Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 Praying for you here. BTDT with injuries on top of losing all 4 of our parents in 5 years. PsalmsChapter 91 1 He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty. 2 I will say of the LORD, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in him will I trust. 3 Surely he shall deliver thee from the snare of the fowler, and from the noisome pestilence. 4 He shall cover thee with his feathers, and under his wings shalt thou trust: his truth shall be thy shield and buckler. 5 Thou shalt not be afraid for the terror by night; nor for the arrow that flieth by day; 6 Nor for the pestilence that walketh in darkness; nor for the destruction that wasteth at noonday. 7 A thousand shall fall at thy side, and ten thousand at thy right hand; but it shall not come nigh thee. 8 Only with thine eyes shalt thou behold and see the reward of the wicked. 9 Because thou hast made the LORD, which is my refuge, even the most High, thy habitation; 10 There shall no evil befall thee, neither shall any plague come nigh thy dwelling. 11 For he shall give his angels charge over thee, to keep thee in all thy ways. 12 They shall bear thee up in their hands, lest thou dash thy foot against a stone. 13 Thou shalt tread upon the lion and adder: the young lion and the dragon shalt thou trample under feet. 14 Because he hath set his love upon me, therefore will I deliver him: I will set him on high, because he hath known my name. 15 He shall call upon me, and I will answer him: I will be with him in trouble; I will deliver him, and honour him. 16 With long life will I satisfy him, and shew him my salvation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Utah Bob #35998 Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 You have my heartfelt condolences. This has been a trying year. I will you both in my thoughts and hope for a new beginning for us all soon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forty Rod SASS 3935 Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 I've put the word out, starting with the Sky Boss. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blackwater 53393 Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 In my house, we pray. We send out prayers for you and your wife. We offer condolences on your losses and wish you both peace and comfort. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pat Riot Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 I am sorry to hear this Doc. I’ll keep your family in my thoughts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raylan Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 Prayers for you and your wife and friends and family all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duffield, SASS #23454 Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 You have my sympathy. Duffield Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charlie Harley, #14153 Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 Prayers and thoughts going out to you and the Mrs, Doc. May 2021 be a bit better for you and yours. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Texas Joker Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 Thats a hard road Doc, thoughts and prayers of support and comfort to you and your Lady. Looks like you have a lot of support here. If your lady has a documented medical condition she can ask for reasonable accommodation at work for that condition under ADA. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tequila Shooter Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 Doc - over the years I’ve lost many Battle Buddies and Brothers in Arms. It is never easy, but the ones that committed suicide are especially sad. I sometimes think if there was something I could’ve done. Try to remember that we can only help those that want help and reach out. I suffer with PTSD and have to fight it everyday, some days are better than others, and in the past I got to the point where, however fleeting, I thought suicide may not be a bad choice. I’m one of the lucky ones, I told my wife and my shrink how I felt. But I can understand what you’re feeling with your friends, in time it will get easier to accept. As far as the love of your life goes, here’s a thought show her how much you love her and how concerned you are for her. Maybe do something with or for her, a special day out together, if she’s the type a day at a spa where she’ll get pampered. Whatever it is, it will hopefully give her a little relief, raise her spirits, and it’ll also make you feel a little better seeing the smile on her face. I hope and pray that these things going on in your life will quickly be put behind, and you and Mrs Doc will find happiness in your mind, peace in your soul and love in your heart. Stay strong but reach out if you’re feeling overwhelmed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rye Miles #13621 Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 Prayers up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deacon Henry, SASS #53503L Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 Wishing you and the Mrs a brighter future and good health. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocWard Posted December 31, 2020 Author Share Posted December 31, 2020 2 hours ago, Texas Joker said: If your lady has a documented medical condition she can ask for reasonable accommodation at work for that condition under ADA. That's where a part of the nonsensical/maliciousness bit I described come in. It has been a constant fight, with the administration attempting to either pit her against the other members of her grade team, or them against other grades. There have been actions taken (not just due to her injury, but often affecting her due to it) that have been anywhere from simply illogical to going against the contract because the principal has wanted things her way. The contract that Mrs. Doc had a hand in writing as the past-President. There have been grievances and more. I could go on and on about just this issue and the headaches and heartaches it has caused her in the past year. There have been a few moments where I've seriously asked her to let me speak with someone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sedalia Dave Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 Doc the wife and I will keep you and your wife in our thoughts and meditations. Everyone of us here feels the pain your wife is going through with the loss of her horse. Be they big or or small loosing a 4 legged friend impacts just as hard as loosing one with only 2 legs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyrel Cody Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 Praying for you and yours. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Texas Joker Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 Document, document, document! Union contracts are a legal and binding employment contract. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J-BAR #18287 Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 3 minutes ago, Texas Joker said: Document, document, document! Union contracts are a legal and binding employment contract. Yep. Probably time to get a lawyer on your side. A mean one! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Calamity Kris Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 We pray in this house as well. Prayers up for you and Mrs. Doc. Any kind of loss is difficult. You and Mrs. Doc have had more than your share this year. May 2021 bring you both love, peace and joy. You deserve it and are worth it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Father Kit Cool Gun Garth Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 Doc, Stay strong for her. Will keep you and her in our prayers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocWard Posted December 31, 2020 Author Share Posted December 31, 2020 18 minutes ago, Texas Joker said: Document, document, document! Union contracts are a legal and binding employment contract. 14 minutes ago, J-BAR #18287 said: Yep. Probably time to get a lawyer on your side. A mean one! Pssst... I'm a lawyer Mrs. Doc is no dummy. I have to tell people I'm serious when I say she is more intelligent than I am. There was a reason numbers of teachers across her district asked her to run, and when she finally did, despite not wanting to, she ran unopposed, twice. But it took it's toll on her, and she was hoping to just relax and teach, without the headaches. I forgot to mention, since the initial injury is work related, there is the worker's comp portion to add to the mix. The Ohio Education Association offers legal counsel for the contract related aspects, and is actually a part of the bargained for process. So far, they haven't gone so far afield that the process could be sidestepped. However, the grievance process itself starts with the administrator, then up to the superintendent (who loathes Mrs. Doc because she wouldn't play nice as president during the bargaining for the new contract and let him have his way), then to the board of education. From there it would go to arbitration if necessary. The problem is, for each grievance, it has to go through the exact same process. The sad thing is, when she first started in the district, and for a decade or so after, it was the district other teachers in the area wanted to get to. Now, if a teacher finds a job elsewhere, they jump on it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Subdeacon Joe Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 Prayers up. O God, our help in time of need, Who are just and merciful, and Who inclines to the supplications of His people. Look down upon Doc & Mrs. Doc and have mercy on them and deliver them from the trouble that now besets them. Deal with Doc & Mrs. Doc not according to their iniquities, but according to Your manifold mercies, for we are the works of Your hands, and You know our weaknesses. I pray to you to grantDoc & Mrs. Doc Your divine helping grace, and endow them with patience and strength to endure their hardships with complete submission to Your Will. Only You know our misery and sufferings, and to You, our only hope and refuge, we flee for relief and comfort, trusting in Your infinite love and compassion, that in due time, when You know best, You will deliver Doc & Mrs. Doc from this trouble, and turn their distress into comfort. We then shall rejoice in Your mercy, and exalt and praise Your Holy Name, O Father, Son and Holy Spirit, both now and forever and to the ages of ages. Amen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Four-Eyed Buck,SASS #14795 Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 Prayers up, Doc. Hang in there for her, just be there when she needs you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Finagler 6853 Life Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 You have my condolences. Both of you. Prayers will be delivered. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Texas Joker Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 Doc, my degrees are in HR, if you have a JD I'll defer to your experience. I had a prof in grad school tell us that if we got into labor contract area disputes without an experienced labor lawyer we should fire ourselves! Wish you guys the best. And like I said earlier I'll be praying for ya Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pat Riot Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 Doc, Regarding your wife’s work, that Principal seems like he or she needs a wake up. The best way to wake up a bureaucrat is either by hitting them in the pocketbook or by bringing their antics to light. There are two fronts that you can work on. Front 1: Pocketbook Section 3.5 of this document might be a small section for Principal Evaluations but it part of the Principal’s evaluation nonetheless; http://education.ohio.gov/getattachment/Topics/Teaching/Educator-Evaluation-System/Ohio-Principal-Evaluation-System-OPES/Principal-Performance-Ratings/OPES-Rubric-1.pdf.aspx Tgat document can be found here, along with other information; http://education.ohio.gov/Topics/Teaching/Educator-Evaluation-System/Ohio-Principal-Evaluation-System-OPES/Principal-Performance-Ratings That page is found here; http://education.ohio.gov/Topics/Teaching/Educator-Evaluation-System/Ohio-Principal-Evaluation-System-OPES/Principal-FAQs And that page can be found here; https://education.ohio.gov/Topics/Teaching/Educator-Evaluation-System/Ohio-Principal-Evaluation-System-OPES ...and that page can be found here; https://education.ohio.gov/Administrators ........and that page here; https://education.ohio.gov/ The trail above started by going to the drop down on this page and clicking on “Administrators”. There is lots of info on these pages above that can be utilized now and in the future. Now, I would also look into labor codes and EEO (equal employment opportunity) codes regarding medical issues and disabilities and report violations to the Dept of Education and the Superintendent of Schools simultaneously. I would reference this code (Conduct Unbecoming) to force a Superintendent to act on having a hearing but only after filing a report with the office of labor and EEO CONDUCT UNBECOMING: http://codes.ohio.gov/oac/3301-73-21v1 Found here: http://codes.ohio.gov/oac/3301-73 Under here: http://codes.ohio.gov/oac/3301 I would also research what can be done in regards to the Americans with Disabilities Act through the dept of labor and other Ohio offices. https://das.ohio.gov/Divisions/Equal-Opportunity/Affirmative-Action-Equal-Employment-Opportunity/EEO-Law#4345403-americans-with-disabilities-act-of-1990 https://das.ohio.gov/Divisions/Equal-Opportunity/Affirmative-Action-Equal-Employment-Opportunity/EEO-Law#4345400-statutory-authority The Ohio EEO office falls under the Dept of Health, which is a good thing in your wife’s case. I would research what can be done through this office to put pressure on the principal of the school district to abide by the ADA and the EEO requirements in Ohio. https://odh.ohio.gov/wps/portal/gov/odh/about-us/employment/eeo I like to use bureaucracy against bureaucrats. Maybe you’ll find something is all this that might help. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cider Creek Shootist Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 Prayers sent for the both of you . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocWard Posted December 31, 2020 Author Share Posted December 31, 2020 37 minutes ago, Texas Joker said: Doc, my degrees are in HR, if you have a JD I'll defer to your experience. I had a prof in grad school tell us that if we got into labor contract area disputes without an experienced labor lawyer we should fire ourselves! Wish you guys the best. And like I said earlier I'll be praying for ya You're professor was right, and your advice has been spot on, trust me. I thank you for taking the time to offer it, that fact does not go unappreciated. For a brief period of time when I was at our county's prosecutor's office I was in the civil section and touched on labor law. Which means I know enough about labor law to be able to tell Mrs. Doc if and when she needs a labor lawyer. So far, the OEA has been up to the task. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocWard Posted December 31, 2020 Author Share Posted December 31, 2020 18 minutes ago, Pat Riot, SASS #13748 said: Doc, Regarding your wife’s work, that Principal seems like he or she needs a wake up. The best way to wake up a bureaucrat is either by hitting them in the pocketbook or by bringing their antics to light. There are two fronts that you can work on. Front 1: Pocketbook . . . I like to use bureaucracy against bureaucrats. Maybe you’ll find something is all this that might help. Thanks, it is appreciated. Right now, I'm trying to keep her mind off of those things. Some of that I know I have seen, some she may have seen, but I will keep it bookmarked for the future. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duffield, SASS #23454 Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 Doc, you have so much going on simultaneously that it is a wonder your health is holding up. Loss of family is always a difficult bullet to chew. After 18 years I still find myself wanting to tell mother about important events in my life. Our pets are family, a thing that our grandparents and most of our parents would not understand, but loosing a pet is just like loosing a child. I have lost the finest woman I ever knew to suicide. I can understand the depths of despair that drives someone to it, but suicide is a long term solution to a short term problem and takes its toll on the survivors. I don't know any words that can provide real comfort or closure to you, but I feel your pain. As for the problems with your wife's job, I believe that the best defense is good offense. I can't give you any legal advise, but hope that you can hit them hard and then get your wife out of that pressure cooker with a sound mind and peaceful soul. Duffield Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tequila Shooter Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 2 hours ago, DocWard said: Pssst... I'm a lawyer DocWard? Lawyer? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michigan Slim Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 After enduring a string of our own trials, I offer this: It truly does boil down to taking it one day at a time. Sometimes it's all you can do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocWard Posted December 31, 2020 Author Share Posted December 31, 2020 1 hour ago, Tequila Shooter said: DocWard? Lawyer? Well, I am a Juris Doctor... Who also happened to serve 16 years or so of my career as a medic in a combat arms unit... Combat arms types tend to give medics the nickname "Doc," or at least the ones they trust. As I've said on more than one occasion, I'm more proud that guys I served with saw fit to call me "Doc Ward" than I am of being able to attach "Esquire" at the end of my name! Also, when I was trying to decide on an alias, it was one I knew I would answer to instead of giving a blank stare, because I had been called by it for so long... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Badger Mountain Charlie SASS #43172 Posted December 31, 2020 Share Posted December 31, 2020 Just saw your post, Doc. I will include you and your wife in my prayers. Wishing you a better 2021, and hope your path is smoother in the future. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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