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Friday Humor - jump in and add some


Pat Riot

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I saw an advertisement for a $200 dollar cruise ship vacation. I could not believe it so called and yes it was legit.

When I got to the pier I paid and entered the ship. Shortly after that I was clubbed on the head and woke up floating in the bay. I saw another guy not far from me and asked if we can get a refund, He said "well they didn't last year!" :huh: 

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On my first parachute jump I pulled the release cord but nothing happened, I pulled the emergency cord and still nothing happened. All of a sudden this guy came up shooting past me like a rocket. In desperation I called out, "do you know anything about parachutes?" He answered no then asked if I knew anything about gas stoves! :wacko:

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On 10/17/2020 at 11:55 PM, Pat Riot, SASS #13748 said:


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I think it's the Jersey Devil!:o

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An exercise for people who are out of shape: Begin with a five-pound potato bag in each hand. Extend your arms straight out from your sides, hold them there for a full minute, and then relax. After a few weeks, move up to ten-pound potato bags. Then try 50-pound potato bags, and eventually try to get to where you can lift a 100-pound potato bag in each hand and hold your arms straight for more than a full minute. Once you feel confident at that level, put a potato in each bag...

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I tried having my mother’s phone disconnected, but the customer-service rep told me that since the account was in my dad’s name, he’d have to be the one to put in the request. The fact that he’d been dead for 40 years didn’t sway her. Then a solution hit me: “If I stop paying the bill, you can turn off the service, right?” “Well, yes,” she said reluctantly. “But that would ruin his credit.” 

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