LawMan Mark, SASS #57095L Posted June 3, 2020 Share Posted June 3, 2020 I remember it well...it was summertime when Dad taught me to swim. I had been hanging around the house, and mom had about enough. So she told dad to get me out of the house. We went down to the local swimming hole, which was a wide, deep part of a local creek. There, without warning, he unceremoniously threw me into the deepest part of the swift creek waters. I really didn't have any problem figuring out how to swim...it came pretty natural. But I had a hell of a time getting out of that burlap sack full of rocks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pat Riot Posted June 3, 2020 Share Posted June 3, 2020 Did not see that coming... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cat Brules Posted June 3, 2020 Share Posted June 3, 2020 Tough love......?? Cat Brules Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smoken D Posted June 3, 2020 Share Posted June 3, 2020 There went the tax deduction. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michigan Slim Posted June 4, 2020 Share Posted June 4, 2020 When I was a teenager my pa, who was strictly anti abortion, decided that the age limit on aborting a fetus should be raised to 18 years old. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Subdeacon Joe Posted June 4, 2020 Share Posted June 4, 2020 Got me! Great build up to a wicked good ending! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Birdgun Quail, SASS #63663 Posted June 4, 2020 Share Posted June 4, 2020 Mark, you must have been a teenager. Fractured Bible Interpretation. Q: Why did God ask Abraham to sacrifice Issac when Issac was but a lad of 12 year or less? A: Because if Issac had been a teenager, it probably wouldn't have been a sacrifice!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Subdeacon Joe Posted June 4, 2020 Share Posted June 4, 2020 5 minutes ago, Birdgun Quail, SASS #63663 said: Mark, you must have been a teenager. Fractured Bible Interpretation. Q: Why did God ask Abraham to sacrifice Issac when Issac was but a lad of 12 year or less? A: Because if Issac had been a teenager, it probably wouldn't have been a sacrifice!! I'm stealing that for FB! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J-BAR #18287 Posted June 4, 2020 Share Posted June 4, 2020 I wonder if I could interest anything if I dropped a fly into the tail end of that riffle? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Widder, SASS #59054 Posted June 4, 2020 Share Posted June 4, 2020 Dads use the weighted burlap sacks because turds float. Atleast thats the reason my dad used..... ..........Widder Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forty Rod SASS 3935 Posted June 4, 2020 Share Posted June 4, 2020 4 hours ago, Michigan Slim said: When I was a teenager my pa, who was strictly anti abortion, decided that the age limit on aborting a fetus should be raised to 18 years old. I am a real proponent of retroactive birth control. Sure are a lot of folks in this country who should have been machine gunned in the womb. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hardpan Curmudgeon SASS #8967 Posted June 4, 2020 Share Posted June 4, 2020 14 hours ago, LawMan Mark, SASS #57095L said: I really didn't have any problem figuring out how to swim...it came pretty natural. But I had a hell of a time getting out of that burlap sack full of rocks. Did you have to share your burlap sack with a bunch of cats too?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LawMan Mark, SASS #57095L Posted June 4, 2020 Author Share Posted June 4, 2020 3 hours ago, Hardpan Curmudgeon SASS #8967 said: Did you have to share your burlap sack with a bunch of cats too?? Now that you mention it...there was a lot of cat hair in that sack... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michigan Slim Posted June 4, 2020 Share Posted June 4, 2020 11 hours ago, Forty Rod SASS 3935 said: I am a real proponent of retroactive birth control. Sure are a lot of folks in this country who should have been machine gunned in the womb. Aye. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cactus Jack Calder Posted June 4, 2020 Share Posted June 4, 2020 I believe it was Louis L'amour who opined that children should be raised in a sealed wooden barrel and fed through the bung hole until they were 21. CJ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charlie Harley, #14153 Posted June 4, 2020 Share Posted June 4, 2020 47 minutes ago, Cactus Jack Calder said: I believe it was Louis L'amour who opined that children should be raised in a sealed wooden barrel and fed through the bung hole until they were 21. CJ WC Field’s version had kids raised in the barrel and fed through the bung hole until teenagers. At that point, plug the bung hole. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MizPete Posted June 5, 2020 Share Posted June 5, 2020 When Petey was a wee lad apparently conventional swimming lessons did not take. His Dad put him in the boat, took him out of the sight of land & threw him overboard. I did not believe this story until his Mom confirmed it. Petey sez by the time they returned home, he'd worked up a good cry & told Mom, who then reigned fire & brimstone onto Dad. His response: Aw Mary, I had a line on the boy. Fast forward a number of years. Petey called me from the YWCA on Monday saying 'You will be taking swimming lessons starting Wednesday night.' I went kicking & screaming. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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