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Subdeacon Joe

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Baby boomer jet realizes it may never be able to retire

 

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On the 67th anniversary of its maiden flight, the bomber confided to friends that it planned to retire so it could revisit old targets, spend time with its grandchildren, and eventually settle down in southern Arizona. However, increasing tensions between the U.S. and Russia, along with the bomber’s failure to set aside money for the future, led to the B-52’s decision to stay in the service until at least 2029.

“I’ve got a leaky fuel bladder, and my wings are really starting to sag,” the B-52 groaned during a pre-flight inspection. “But my country needs me, and to be honest, I didn’t really plan for retirement. I guess I always thought I would die during the Cold War, burning in after dropping a nuclear load on those commie b******s.”

 

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BUFF!

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"If I had known I was gonna' live this long, I'd have taken better care of myself!!"

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According to rumors/plans, the Air Force doesn't plan to retire the H-models until 2050! If funding is available they are planning to replace the current eight engines with newer, improved efficiency and higher thrust engines, have already started upgrading the electronics and weapons capacity.  I tell my doctors they better keep me going, as I want to see when the BUFF's are retired in 2050...for my 108th birthday!:o :rolleyes:

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13 minutes ago, Trailrider #896 said:

I tell my doctors they better keep me going, as I want to see when the BUFF's are retired in 2050...

 

Just watch, in 2040 they will extend it to 2075.

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Buffy will disappear about the same time, ants, cockroaches, mosquitoes, coyotes, and useless idiots do.  They'll always be with us.

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There is no bomber like the BUFF. Its about time for me and Cimarron to make another pilgramage to the Pima Air Museum and pay my respects to those that are there and the others. Soon to be retired again LOL, I'll have the time!!

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Bring back the 1911!

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There should oughtta be a '52 maintained in flying condition parked next to the USS Constitution.  ;)  

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And we think the Gooney Bird's immortal.  Wonder what the late Oscar Brand could come up with for new words for the song about the DC-3 as applied

to the BUFF and maybe the Hawg?

"They patch her up with masking tape,

    with paper clips and string,

And still she flies, she never dies,

   Mathusilah with wings!"

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4 minutes ago, Hardpan Curmudgeon SASS #8967 said:

There should oughtta be a '52 maintained in flying condition parked next to the USS Constitution.  ;)  

How would it become airborne and how would it be armed first?

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2 minutes ago, Hardpan Curmudgeon SASS #8967 said:

There should oughtta be a '52 maintained in flying condition parked next to the USS Constitution.  ;)  

Naw! In the first place it would count against the number allowed according to the current Arms Limitation Treaties.  Anyway, they have already reclaimed two (2) from the "bone yard" at Davis-Monthan.  If those two are "reserectons", are the remaining ones down there "zombies"? :o

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3 minutes ago, Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 said:

How would it become airborne and how would it be armed first?

 

1 minute ago, Trailrider #896 said:

Naw! In the first place it would count against the number allowed according to the current Arms Limitation Treaties.  Anyway, they have already reclaimed two (2) from the "bone yard" at Davis-Monthan.  If those two are "reserectons", are the remaining ones down there "zombies"? :o

 

Y'all are missing the point...  :)

 

"Old Ironsides" is a symbol of American permanence.  Still a commissioned warship at 222 years of age.  Still well-maintained and seaworthy, still has a crew, still has her armament, but her purpose in life is now ceremonial:

 

"Constitution's stated mission today is to promote understanding of the Navy's role in war and peace through educational outreach, historical demonstration, and active participation in public events...."

 

A "BUFF" could could also fill such a role.  ;)

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5 minutes ago, Hardpan Curmudgeon SASS #8967 said:

Still well-maintained and seaworthy, still has a crew, still has her armament,

 

 

https://ussconstitutionmuseum.org/2015/08/25/modern-armament/

 

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Originally rated as a 44-gun frigate, USS Constitution typically carried around 54 guns. During the War of 1812, she mounted twenty-four 32-pound carronades on the spar deck, as well as a long 18-pound “chase” gun forward, and thirty 24-pound long guns on the gun deck.

Today, Constitution’s guns are replicas, not originals. When the ship returned to Boston in 1897 for her 100th birthday, she no longer carried any guns. In 1883 she had been turned into barracks and a “receiving ship” for sailors, so guns were no longer necessary. Her first 20th century restoration in 1906-1907 saw fifty-five replica guns made for the ship. All of the present guns were cast for the 1927-1931 restoration with the exception of two 1812-era replica carronades on the after quarter deck. Cast in 1981, these carronades are closer to Constitution‘s 1812 spar deck armament. The gun deck guns were cast in the Charlestown Navy Yard in 1929. The pattern of these guns was based on a British siege gun that was abandoned in Boston during the American Revolution and is currently displayed near Harvard University. The decision to cast “British” guns was made by Lieutenant John A. Lord, Supervisor of the 1927-1931 restoration. He based his decision upon inaccurate research that led the Navy to mistakenly believe that Constitution was outfitted with British guns in 1812.

[Courtesy Naval History & Heritage Command Detachment Boston]

Newly cast 24-pound long guns in the forge at the Charlestown Navy Yard in 1930. [Courtesy Naval History & Heritage Command Detachment Boston]

Eighteen of the thirty replica 24-pounders are marked with a board arrow and cipher making them appear British in origin. The incised “broad arrow” is a mark signifying that the gun was originally “Property of the (British) Crown.” The “royal cipher” GR refers to Georgius Rex (King George II who reigned 1727-1760). The other twelve replica 24-pounders were cast from an American gun.

 

This 1930 photo by Leslie Jones shows the British mark on the gun. [USS Constitution Museum Collection.]

The British “royal cypher” is seen upside-down on a newly cast gun in this 1930 photo by Leslie Jones. [USS Constitution Museum Collection.]

The "royal cypher" photographed in 2010. [Courtesy Naval History & Heritage Command Detachment Boston]

The “royal cypher” photographed in 2010. Note the “2” in the upper left corner of the cypher. This denotes that the original gun was cast during the reign of King George II. [Courtesy Naval History & Heritage Command Detachment Boston]

The replica carronades for the spar deck and long guns for the gun deck were first installed in 1930 near the end of the 1927-1931 restoration.

 

[USS Constitution Museum Collection]

A “British” long gun is loaded through the main hatch to the gun deck in 1930. Photo by Leslie Jones. [USS Constitution Museum Collection]

[Courtesy Naval History & Heritage Command Detachment Boston]

An newly cast American gun on display at the starboard bow of the gun deck in 1931. [Courtesy Naval History & Heritage Command Detachment Boston]

Though decades separate Constitution‘s restorations, the methods remain the same. In 1930, photographer Leslie Jones captured a Navy Yard worker guiding a long gun as it is lowered toward the main hatch by a crane.

 

[USS Constitution Museum Collection]

A long gun is loaded onto Constitution in 1930. Photo by Leslie Jones. [USS Constitution Museum Collection]

Ship restorers still use cranes to hoist the guns on to and off of the ship. These same guns have been removed and refurbished during all subsequent 20th and 21st century restorations.

 

NHHC Detachment Boston workers remove one of the 18-pound guns in the autumn of 2007. [Courtesy Naval History & Heritage Command Detachment Boston]

NHHC Detachment Boston ship restorers remove a gun in the autumn of 2007. The guns were removed to allow ship restorers to replace the entire spar deck. [Courtesy Naval History & Heritage Command Detachment Boston]

In preparation for the 2015-2017 restoration, all of Constitution‘s guns were removed and stored temporarily in the Charlestown Navy Yard.

 

Constitution‘s replica long guns will be refurbished along with their carriages during the 2015-2017 restoration. [Courtesy USS Constitution Museum]

Constitution‘s replica long guns and their carriages will be refurbished during the 2015-2017 restoration. [Courtesy USS Constitution Museum]

The carronades and long guns are crated and will be sent to a United States Coast Guard facility in Maryland to be stripped of their paint surface and recoated with a new protective coating. They will be reinstalled on the ship at the end of the 2015-2017 restoration.

 

[Courtesy USS Constitution Museum]

Constitution‘s carronades and long guns await shipment to Maryland, 2015. [Courtesy USS Constitution Museum]

 

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How about Rocket Assisted Takeoff (RATO) with enough power for a vertical takeoff?  As far as armaments, you'd have to have a secure bunker nearby. :ph34r:

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30 minutes ago, Trailrider #896 said:

How about Rocket Assisted Takeoff (RATO) with enough power for a vertical takeoff?  As far as armaments, you'd have to have a secure bunker nearby. :ph34r:

 

I don't think that the USS Constitution is flight capable. 

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Posted (edited)
5 hours ago, Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 said:

Which will be retired later, BUFF or Warthog?

 

The BUFF, because the Air Force desperately wants to get rid of the A-10. Eventually, they'll figure out a way to do it. That and the huge amount of flight hours they endure, gives the Air Force additional cause. :angry:

Edited by DocWard

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My daughter, the one that wrote the "Jackwagon vs. the Aliens" SASS short story, has wanted to do one about aliens landing, maybe in New York Harbor, or something of the sort, with an EMP shield that disables any warship that comes near them, and someone at the Pentagon realizing the USS Constitution would be able to penetrate the shield. She hasn't started it yet, but if she ever writes, I will certainly post it here.

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I recall one of the tv spots they used to run during the bicentennial. Bicentennial Minute I think they called em.

They showed the Constitution and the narrator said, ”Her decks no longer run red with blood, but she still has sides of iron”

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6 hours ago, Subdeacon Joe said:

 

I don't think that the USS Constitution is flight capable. 

Of course not, it doesn't have any wings. ^_^

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Although NOT flight-capable, and earlier models, there are at least two BUFF's within 60+ miles of Denver.  One is outside the Wings Over the Rockies flight museum just east of town, and the other is outside the Air Force Academy near Colorado Springs.  Both are mounted on pylons, as if flying low-level missions.  Why aren't they inside somewhere? Not because they are so big (although that is a factor in the case of the WOTR one), but so the Russian satellites can determine they are static displays, and not counted against the treaty maximums. :ph34r: ;)

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