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Linn Keller, SASS 27332, BOLD 103

A failure! A failure, I say!

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I am almost sure I should hang my head in shame and that I should wear a (paper) grocery sack over my head when in decent company!

After re-enacting as Brother William, calligrapher and scribe and Cistercian monk of the 10th century, I write out of habit in a calligraphic font.

This means I could never make a living robbing banks ... a holdup note would be instantly recognized!

I'm told I still have a Suth'n accent (I can't hear it but apparently these Northern Ohio Yankees can) so I can't make a living as an obscene phone caller!

Went to Urgent Care last night and was told among other things to lose weight, stop smoking, stop drinking and stop wenching ...

I smoked once, as a five year old I swiped one of Pappy's Marsh Wheeling stogies and a Lucifer match and disappeared around the corner of the garage ... I staggered back the color of spring grass. 

Only time I ever smoked.

Never since.

Granddad, rest his soul, was a moonshiner and a moonrunner ... and I don't drink.

As far as wenching ... was I to call my wife a wench, my face would be suddenly big and round and the exact shape of her hard swung frying pan!

Not only have I failed as a bank robber and as an obscene phone caller, I've failed in stopping smoking, drinking and wenching!

 

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... a tenor solo ...

... ten miles away, so low I can't be heard ...

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1 hour ago, Linn Keller, SASS 27332, BOLD 103 said:

I am almost sure I should hang my head in shame and that I should wear a (paper) grocery sack over my head when in decent company!

 

Stay away from people that would be considered decent company!

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Mr Keller.   I have read about abstaining from activities of which you speak.  To name a few, such as drinking, smoking, overindulgence,  and womanizing, etc.  AND decided to give up on reading.    The choice is yours, I made mine.      GW

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If I didn't have my vices I wouldn't have much at'all. 

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Everybody dies from something, why not have fun on the way out? 

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7 minutes ago, Yul Lose said:

Everybody dies from something, why not have fun on the way out? 

Might as well. I certainly wouldn't want to be some health nut laying there dying of nothing.

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Only quiters give up. Go back to doc with stogie in teeth 2 young wenches on your arms each holding bottles finest bathtub experiment.

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12 minutes ago, Perro Del Diablo said:

Only quiters give up. Go back to doc with stogie in teeth 2 young wenches on your arms each holding bottles finest bathtub experiment.

That’s what I’m talkin about!!!!

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Now, now.  I bet there are ways that you will make a wonderful Horrible Example.

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I spent most of my money on ale and wenches. The rest I just wasted.

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If I had a dollar for every drink I ever took I would indeed be rich. Rich in the knowledge that I had a great time. :lol:

...while it lasted. Alas, I no longer drink. It got the better of me. I would like those dollars though. My gun safes would be full and I would have several motorcycles...probably a nice RV too! :D

 

As for smoking, I wish I had never started, but I did. No use fretting over it. I haven’t had a smoke in over a year and a half. I do not miss it.

 

As for wenching? Before getting married I dearly loved the ladies. Now I dearly love my wife of 39 years, what’s even more special, she dearly loves me.

To love is wonderful. To be loved is the most fabulous gift.

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I had a visit with my Dr. recently and she asked about my lifestyle, specifically how's my sex life, my smoking and my drinking. I told her that with 80 years on my back, 60 some of those years as a heavy smoker, radiation for prostate cancer and subsequent hormonal treatment, sex is a fond memory. Smoking was conquered around 20 years ago.  She asked how much I drank and what variety. I told her I have found a love for Irish whiskey.  She said, "Well, we'll have to fix that". I informed her that they had successfully "fixed" me and if she was going to suggest taking my Irish away from me that I had a good solution, I would change Doctors.  I said, "Your choice". She said "I'll see you in 6 months".

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As SDJ has pointed out, I would be honored if you would join me in the Bad Example category for a time.

 

Imis

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Bad example is a term that is incorrect (for me). I consider myself a fun example. Of course smoking is out, and as for wenching, my little blonde ranch foreman or foreperson, is from muleshoe Tx, and those ladies don't tolerate their guy 'wenching' unless they are the wenches. I got wapped upside the head for looking at a pair of Blanchard spurs at a roping. Well they were on a girl wearing stretch gold lame' pants  but it was the spurs that had my attention. any cowboy knows Blanchard spurs are very special.

Still love my Crown and Forty Creek, and beer.

 

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I never spent any of my life smoking, boozing or behaving badly as I figured they'd ruin my chances of finding a decent lady. After a long search I found the perfect woman at last and spent a good 15 years as a contently domesticated husband. Unfortunately when she hit midlife she went into full crisis mode and decided to re-invent herself, and that included some wenching on the side. We're now going our separate ways, and I'm at a point of deciding whether I want to resume chasing women at my age or just live the rest of my life on my own terms and find my own happiness. It definitely won't involve any smoking or boozing though. More likely a lot of traveling, sightseeing, fast cars and cool guns. Life is way too short... find what you enjoy doing and do it, as long as it's legal and doesn't result in any lasting physical or emotional trauma!

.

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