Widder, SASS #59054 Posted November 8, 2017 Share Posted November 8, 2017 Howdy Saloon Pards. Ya know, after 35+ years of marriage, you would think that you would understand a woman better. So, just a word of advice to share for those of you contemplating a midnight joke: 'SHE' won't think its funny if you unscrew the light bulb and leave the toilet seat up..... Course, I've had time to see HER side of it while fixing meowndang breakfast this morning..... ..........Widder Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sedalia Dave Posted November 8, 2017 Share Posted November 8, 2017 You sir are either very brave or very very foolish. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Perro Del Diablo Posted November 8, 2017 Share Posted November 8, 2017 not like you filled bowl with ice Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Widder, SASS #59054 Posted November 8, 2017 Author Share Posted November 8, 2017 1 minute ago, Country Wildman said: not like you filled bowl with ice Exactly. "Plausible Deniability" didn't help me either. ..........Widder Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marshal Dan Troop 70448 Posted November 8, 2017 Share Posted November 8, 2017 58 minutes ago, Sedalia Dave said: You sir are either very brave or very very foolish. Very brave, or very lucky? Surprised he survived to tell the tale. MT Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forty Rod SASS 3935 Posted November 8, 2017 Share Posted November 8, 2017 2 hours ago, Sedalia Dave said: You sir are either very brave or very very foolish. or just dumber than a fistful of sand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smoken D Posted November 8, 2017 Share Posted November 8, 2017 My boner, years back while I was a beat cop I came home after midnight and I mean dead tired. Wife wanted to talk, talk, talk. I finally pulled out the handcuffs, put one side on her wrist, closed it, put the other end around the bed post and closed it. By the time my head hit the pillow I was out. In the morning when I woke up there she was looking down on me with those cuffs on and oh boy the look I was a getten. Crap, what did I do. Long time of silent treatment, flowers, candy, ice cream, cute cards, you name it. Cost me till I was broke, but ya know I got plenty of sleep out on the couch for a few days. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eyesa Horg Posted November 8, 2017 Share Posted November 8, 2017 No point in overly worrying about it, no matter what you will get in trouble again and not even know what you did. And---she'll tell you "If you don't know what you did--------" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marshal Dan Troop 70448 Posted November 8, 2017 Share Posted November 8, 2017 46 minutes ago, Smoken D said: My boner, I came home pulled out the handcuffs, put one on her wrist, closed it, put the other end around the bed post and closed it. when I woke up there she was looking down on me Crap, what did I do. . Had to read between the lines to get the real story. You did good. MT Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Calico Mary Posted November 8, 2017 Share Posted November 8, 2017 and yer tha guy wit tha advice column?????????????????? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Widder, SASS #59054 Posted November 9, 2017 Author Share Posted November 9, 2017 2 hours ago, Calico Mary said: and yer tha guy wit tha advice column?????????????????? How do you think I learnt everything? ..........Widder Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocWard Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 11 hours ago, Widowmaker Hill SASS #59054 said: Ya know, after 35+ years of marriage, you would think that you would understand a woman better. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA {BREATHE} HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Uhmmmm... No Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Badger Mountain Charlie SASS #43172 Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 In my 59 years of marriage, I have found that the female version of humor, and the male version of humor, are very different in texture and appearance. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grumpy Old Man Posted November 10, 2017 Share Posted November 10, 2017 Ain't that the truth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pat Riot Posted November 10, 2017 Share Posted November 10, 2017 I understand women perfectly. If it makes sense to me I am probably wrong... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trigger Mike Posted November 10, 2017 Share Posted November 10, 2017 I've often thought of putting clear wrap over the bowl for her to find the next morning, but thankfully always talk myself out of it. BUT, I just thought of a funny idea, I could put clear wrap across the doorway into the bathroom since she goes there in the dark, she'd walk right into it. hmmmm!!! that might be funny! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 Posted November 10, 2017 Share Posted November 10, 2017 So you want someone to read the wire to you while you will be recovering? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eyesa Horg Posted November 10, 2017 Share Posted November 10, 2017 1 hour ago, Trigger Mike said: I've often thought of putting clear wrap over the bowl for her to find the next morning, but thankfully always talk myself out of it. BUT, I just thought of a funny idea, I could put clear wrap across the doorway into the bathroom since she goes there in the dark, she'd walk right into it. hmmmm!!! that might be funny! What Marshall Mo Hare said---- Bad, bad, bad idea. You will only find it funny for a moment. Although the rest of us will laugh for a while! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pat Riot Posted November 10, 2017 Share Posted November 10, 2017 Okay...here's a good one for anyone. Get a hot glue gun and a blow dryer. Pick a doorway. Get glue gun hot with a stick of glue. Put blow dryer on high and squeeze out the glue so that the air strings the glue out to stick to door jamb or at the top so it dangles down. Makes great spider webbing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Widder, SASS #59054 Posted November 10, 2017 Author Share Posted November 10, 2017 8 minutes ago, Pat Riot, SASS #13748 said: Okay...here's a good one for anyone. Get a hot glue gun and a blow dryer. Pick a doorway. Get glue gun hot with a stick of glue. Put blow dryer on high and squeeze out the glue so that the air strings the glue out to stick to door jamb or at the top so it dangles down. Makes great spider webbing. I know this isn't my advice column, but you'd be better off putting bubble gum in her new hairdo..... ..........Widder Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Calico Mary Posted November 10, 2017 Share Posted November 10, 2017 some of yu iz NOT gittin' invited ta tha house warmin' party..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whiskey Business Posted November 10, 2017 Share Posted November 10, 2017 On 11/8/2017 at 1:14 PM, Smoken D said: My boner, years back while I was a beat cop I came home after midnight and I mean dead tired. Wife wanted to talk, talk, talk. I finally pulled out the handcuffs, put one side on her wrist, closed it, put the other end around the bed post and closed it. By the time my head hit the pillow I was out. In the morning when I woke up there she was looking down on me with those cuffs on and oh boy the look I was a getten. Crap, what did I do. Long time of silent treatment, flowers, candy, ice cream, cute cards, you name it. Cost me till I was broke, but ya know I got plenty of sleep out on the couch for a few days. You're lucky you got to wake up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smoken D Posted November 11, 2017 Share Posted November 11, 2017 48 minutes ago, Whiskey Business said: You're lucky you got to wake up. When she finally spoke to me, those were the first words out of her mouth, only because she did not have the cuff keys. I sleep very lightly for a long time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Widder, SASS #59054 Posted November 11, 2017 Author Share Posted November 11, 2017 2 minutes ago, Smoken D said: When she finally spoke to me, those were the first words out of her mouth, only because she did not have the cuff keys. I sleep very lightly for a long time. Lucky Smoker in Missouri: you should make an inquiry on my 'Advice' thread before doing such thing again..... ..........Widder Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ramblin Gambler Posted November 13, 2017 Share Posted November 13, 2017 The most important thing about understanding women is .. once you figure her out, NEVER LET HER KNOW. It's best to continue to mess things up once in a while so she doesn't get suspicious. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.