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Idle Mind Wanderings


Calamity Kris

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Posted

I was stuck in traffic on a busy two lane road {that should actually be four lanes} when my mind started to wander..................

 

If you had a Chevy Volt, and replaced it with another one, would that make you revolting?

 

What kind of wanderings can you come up with?

Posted

Can you hate someone when you're sitting on a love seat?

Posted

Is it still called a breezeway if there's no breeze?

Posted

A frog will jump if you make a loud noise next to it.

 

But, if you cut off all its legs,  it'll go deaf.

 

 

..........Widder

 

Posted
7 minutes ago, Sgt. C.J. Sabre, SASS #46770 said:

If an occasional chair is only occasionally a chair, what is it the rest of the time?

A table?

Posted
24 minutes ago, Sgt. C.J. Sabre, SASS #46770 said:

If an occasional chair is only occasionally a chair, what is it the rest of the time?

Something  to  pile  the clothes  on that  I will  eventually  fold up  and  put  away .

 

 I keep  telling  my wife  that  when  I  say  I will  do  something ,  I  will  do  it . Reminding  me  every  6 months isn't  necessary . 

Posted

Oh boy...don't get me started...problem is my wandering thoughts in regards to some people and / or traffic also include; firearms, explosives, duct tape, a 100 watt P.A. System or a swift kick in the @$$...and often all at the same time.:o:D

Posted

Why's it take so long at FAST food joint?

Posted

my wife does not get along with her computer

 

i keep telling her: "Software is like a husband: you have to poke it and prod it until it does what you want".

 

she tells me that doesn't work either

 

(anybody wanna go to the range for a while?)

Posted
8 hours ago, Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 said:

If you want hot French fries, ask for them with no salt, then take some salt packets.

Remember THE LIGHTER SIDE in Mad? Couple of pages of 4-panel comic strips that were kinda related.

 

One that stuck with me for years. The Lighter Side of Fast Food.

 

This couple goes in to a burger joint, and he ordered a burger, "no pickles". 

 

Then he explains to the girl that insures a fresh one. "All those in the warming bin have pickles. They have to make me a NEW one, WITHOUT pickles."

 

Then they showed two burger employees in the back. One's complaining, "I hate these special orders, where I have to unwrap a burger, take the pickles off, then rewrap it."

Posted

How come we park in a driveway and drive on a parkway???:rolleyes:

Posted
1 hour ago, Alpo said:

 

 

Then he explains to the girl that insures a fresh one. "All those in the warming bin have pickles. They have to make me a NEW one, WITHOUT pickles."

 

Then they showed two burger employees in the back. One's complaining, "I hate these special orders, where I have to unwrap a burger, take the pickles off, then rewrap it."

I have a buddy that hates raw tomatoes. He loves them as a raw material to make things like pizza sauce, but hates them on a burger. I, on the other hand love tomatoes. 

When we were kids, there was a burger place that was our regular hangout. He used to ask for no tomato, I'd ask for extra.

One day they told us,

"New policy. Ten cents charge foe extra tomato."

So my buddy asked, "Do I get a ten cent discount for no tomato?"

"No."

"Fine, regular tomato on both,"

Then, standing at the counter, we both unwrapped our burgers, and put his tomato on my burger. 

They never tried it again.  

Posted

When you clean a vacuum cleaner you become a vacuum cleaner.

Posted

If corn oil comes from corn, olive oil from olives...

 

Where does baby oil come from?

Posted
6 hours ago, Dantankerous said:

If corn oil comes from corn, olive oil from olives...

 

Where does baby oil come from?

 

Diapers??? :ph34r:

Posted

If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around, is a woman still right?

Posted
25 minutes ago, Buffalo Creek Law Dog said:

If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around, is a woman still right?

Yes

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