Dusty Balz, SASS#46599 Posted February 12, 2015 Posted February 12, 2015 Subject: My New Golf Book You may or may not know it, but I've been very busy over the past 2 years, putting my thoughts and ideas together in a book about Golf. I am very proud of the results, and in order to market the publication, I am asking friends and family to be the first to own a copy. Here's the Table of Contents from my new book, "Winning Golf Strategies," which I believe gives the reader valuable playing tips and insider information that I've gained through my own years of experience in the game and observations of my golfing partners. Table of Contents: Chapter 1- How to properly line up your Fourth putt. Chapter 2- How to hit a Nike from the rough when you hit a Titleist from the tee.Chapter 3- How to avoid the water when you lie 8 in a bunker.Chapter 4- How to get more distance off the shank.Chapter 5- When to give the Ranger the finger.Chapter 6- Using your shadow on the greens to confuse your opponent.Chapter 7- When to implement Handicap Management.Chapter 8- Proper excuses for drinking beer before 9 a.m.Chapter 9- How to urinate behind a 4" x 4" post...Undetected.Chapter 10- How to rationalize a 6-hour round.Chapter 11- How to find that ball that everyone else saw go in the water.Chapter 12- Why your spouse doesn't care that you birdied the 5th.Chapter 13- How to let a Foursome play through your Twosome.Chapter 14- How to relax when you are hitting three off the tee.Chapter 15- When to suggest major swing corrections to your opponent.Chapter 16- God and the meaning of The Birdie-To-Bogey Putt.Chapter 17- When to re-grip your Ball Retriever.Chapter 18- Use a strong grip on the Hand Wedge and Weak Slip on the Foot Wedge.Chapter 19- Why male golfers will pay $5 a beer from the Cart Girl and give her a $3 tip, but will balk at a $3.50 Beer at the 19th Hole and stiff the Bartender.
Bugs Bonney SASS # 10171 Posted February 12, 2015 Posted February 12, 2015 "How not to become a golf cart hit and run victim" would have been helpful so would "The gator in the pond does not own you ball"
Chickasaw Bill SASS #70001 Posted February 12, 2015 Posted February 12, 2015 ya forgot How to cruse around in a golf cart , drink BEER , then call it exercize
guitar_slinger Posted February 12, 2015 Posted February 12, 2015 Reasons why it's inappropriate to do a 10 shot dump from a match rifle on the 1st green.
Abilene Slim SASS 81783 Posted February 12, 2015 Posted February 12, 2015 Just got back from a golfing weekend in FL. Pretty much describes my game!
Alpo Posted February 13, 2015 Posted February 13, 2015 Chapter 14. 7th hole on the course I used to play teed off over the water. Large oak trees near the near edge. Daddy put his first one in the water. His third shot went into the water. #5 hit an oak tree and also went swimming. He opened a new sleeve of balls, and a guy we were playing with tossed a smiley down in front of him. Said there was no sense in getting a new one wet. Daddy kicked it back to him, teed up #7, and said, "The day I can't afford to drown 'em is the day I quit". I think he was on in 11.
Cheatin Charlie Posted February 13, 2015 Posted February 13, 2015 Lewis Black does a funny bit on golfers that is on Ytube. Rated "R" for foul language but very funny for adult listeners that golf or used to golf like I did.
Cypress Sun Posted February 13, 2015 Posted February 13, 2015 Chapter 15 - How to hide a five gallon bucket of dirt and a piece of sod on your cart with sub-chapter on divot replacement.
Kid Rich Posted February 13, 2015 Posted February 13, 2015 The two most used phrases in golf are in the following order. I think I've got it now. Oh, sh!t. kR
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