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Things in football you hope don't find it's way into SASS


Dirty Dan Dawkins

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Posted

When my starting position is having both hands resting on table, I don't want my Timer Operator putting his hands and the timer up into my crotch from the backside and yelling 'Standbye, OMAHA 1, hut......beeeeeep".

 

:o

 

Dan: being a member of the 'Cracker Crew' does have its drawbacks..... :lol::lol::lol:

 

 

..........Widder

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Posted

What about sideline reporters who know nothing about the game asking you a really stupid question as you leave the loading table?

 

Especially since the shooter won't actually ask the question asked, but will come back with some cliche...

 

Posted
"Things in football you hope don't find it's way into SASS"

 

Jerry Jones

Posted

Lightning bolts.

Posted

Spiking revolvers after completing a stage.

I've done that!

 

Not really on purpose but I've done that.

Posted

$25 for parking.

 

And $10.00 for a beer!!

Posted

When the match is over and we are taking our showers to wash off the dust and dirt, at least we do not have female reporters in the room trying to interview us cowboys.

 

P. S. I would not mind seeing scantly clad cheer leaders at matches shaking everything including lots of visable silicone.

I don't know, Erin Andrews and that Fox Sports chick aren't hard to look at.

I think cheerleaders would be fine, but I imagine the raw times and misses would significantly increase, even just getting loaded and to the line.

Posted

First of all, ain't nobody slappin' my butt unless it's my wife (Darlin'). Not that I have a problem with Ray, but, hey, I don't want Santa River Stan touching me anywhere either 'cause I am closer to Stan than Ray....uh, I mean, uh.....you know what I mean 'cause......For Pete's sake I'm not like that 'cause......awww hell just shoot me already.

It's ok. You don't need to explain. Your well liked around here. Especially by some of the fellas round here.

Posted

Cowboy Shooters getting a $150 million, 5 year contract.

 

Cleats on the bottom of cowboy boots.

 

Concussions, achilles tendons and ACL ruptures.

Posted

I can hear Madden now. "Look at this Al, Grizz was moving from the rifle to the shotgun when out of nowhere Mrs Grizz came through 3 spotters and the TO to put that hit on him! Wow, there's goes his clean match!" :D

 

:D Now that's funny right there!

Posted

How about what we would like to see, like "Tight ends"! Just saying.

Posted

How about what we would like to see, like "Tight ends"! Just saying.

...yeah Ironmaiden....on wimmin shooters ;)

Posted

The RO calling an audible at the line.....

 

Say your line....

Shooter Ready!....

Stand By....

RO calls Audible.... Changes from an Nevada Sweep to a Regressive Sweep.

Beep!

Posted

The RO calling an audible at the line.....

 

Say your line....

Shooter Ready!....

Stand By....

RO calls Audible.... Changes from an Nevada Sweep to a Regressive Sweep.

Beep!

Oh NO!! I've actually had that happen to me -- no one told me I was playing cowboy football!

Posted

With football season over, I got to thinking about how much it has changed and how many things have been introduced to the sport in my short lifetime. Then I thought, what if some of these "things" (rules, gadgets,behaviors) came to SASS and how bad it would be for the sport.

Ok, I'll start:

Butt slapping. Yeah, I can see it now. Red River Ray smacking DiD's behind and saying "nice shotgun work buddy". I don't think so. Of course those two may like that sort of thing. I dunno. I really doubt it.

 

Your turn.

 

 

Felons

Posted

5 yard penalty for jumping the beep. OK, back up 5 yds. now give me the starting line again.

 

BS

Posted

Stage calls for 10-10-4. All guns on one of three tables.

At the beep try to make you way past the linemen to your pistols. If you get to shoot your pistols, make your way past the linebackers to your rifle. If you survive shooting your rifle, make your way past the backs to your shotgun. If your still conscious go over and slap DID on the butt..........................not that there's anything wrong with that

Posted

Sacks. I definitely don't want to see getting sacked finding it's way into SASS

Posted

 

 

confused, I don't think so. I heard they were re-naming the NFL to National Felons league.

I thought Ray Lewis retired??????????

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