Subdeacon Joe Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 Velveeta Shortage Looms! Queso-eating football fans may want to prepare themselves for a possible Velveeta shortage before the Super Bowl. Kraft Foods, the makers of the easily meltable cheese blocks is having trouble keeping up with the Velveeta demand. "Given the incredible popularity of Velveeta this time of year, it is possible consumers may not be able to find their favorite product on store shelves over the next couple of weeks," Kraft spokeswoman Jody Moore told Ad Age, which cited reports of a shortage at a few East Coast grocery stores. "Our retail customers are aware of the situation and we expect it to be a short-term issue." The pathos! The humanity of it all!
Alferd Packer Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 First the Ammo shortage, Now This! It's the HOARDERS. They are Hoarding Cheese and Rimfire .22's.
Forty Rod SASS 3935 Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 I can promise you that I'm not contributing to the shortage.
Branchwater Jack SASS #88854 Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 What's that? No Velveeta? You know, I don't even think my wife has ever baught a brick of it. My mother used it all the time. My wife prefers we eat cheese.
Whiskey Business Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 There's nothing wrong with Velveeta! It has a longer shelf life than ammo.
Bugs Bonney SASS # 10171 Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 Sorry, there will be no Super Bowl this year at our ranch.T he Packers have been eliminated, ergo the season is over. Bugs God, Family, and the Green Bay Packers. (Not necessarily in that order) Bonney
Badger Mountain Charlie SASS #43172 Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 Now what am I going to put on my white bread and mayo sammish. Guess I will have to go with the ham and Swiss.
Uno Mas SASS #80082 Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 One of the horrors of my childhood was Velveeta. It didn't eclipse the nuns, but it came damn close.
Badlands Bob #61228 Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 I hope this shortage doesn't spread to the cheese whiz supplies. Cheese in a jar. What a great idea.
Nasty Newt # 7365 Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 "Huge cache of Velveeta found in survivalist's garage! Film at 11:00!"
Badger Mountain Charlie SASS #43172 Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 Apparently the TOFU supply is intact.
Bugs Bonney SASS # 10171 Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 One of the horrors of my childhood was Velveeta. It didn't eclipse the nuns, but it came damn close. Nothing eclipsed the nuns! Fear of the Russians and nuclear holocaust didn't eclipse the nuns. To this day the image of a nun, a chalkboard, and a sentence to the diagramed makes my palms sweat. I found out early that writing the spelling words you missed 25 times and spelling each of those words three different ways brought down the wrath of God. bugs
Badger Mountain Charlie SASS #43172 Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 The NUNs are God's KILLER ANGELS. They gave reason to the notion of "WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG STICK!"
Michigan Slim Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 Ya know what I miss? Government cheese! My Grandma used to get it cause she qualified. She would collect all the food she could and give it to folks that needed it worse. But she always had a block a that cheese for when I come ta stay. Man, I wish I could get some a that! (without qualifying for it...)
Calico Mary Posted January 9, 2014 Posted January 9, 2014 There wuz a big run on the stuff in Colorado and Washington.....
Hardpan Curmudgeon SASS #8967 Posted January 9, 2014 Posted January 9, 2014 There wuz a big run on the stuff in Colorado and Washington..... MUNCHIES~!!!
Rye Miles #13621 Posted January 9, 2014 Posted January 9, 2014 I don't know if I will be able to make it to half-time!!!!
Harvey Mushman Posted January 9, 2014 Posted January 9, 2014 It'd hafta be a survival situation before I could force Velveta (liquid cardboard) down my throat. UUUGHHHHH
Virgil Ray Hality, SASS# 37355 Posted January 9, 2014 Posted January 9, 2014 Arg! Velveta? Not in my pantry!
Shorty Jack Hammer Posted January 9, 2014 Posted January 9, 2014 Darn and I've been making bullets out of the stuff ...now what?
Marshal Mo Hare, SASS #45984 Posted January 9, 2014 Posted January 9, 2014 I've been told that nothing is more feared than a nun with a yardstick.
Iron Pony Posted January 10, 2014 Posted January 10, 2014 Don't worry, as I recall DAP used to make an all weather caulk in about the same color. Even better it come in those handy dispenser tubes like spray cheese and you can run an even bigger bead if you cut back the tip a little. Same nutritional value as well.
Uno Mas SASS #80082 Posted January 10, 2014 Posted January 10, 2014 Nothing eclipsed the nuns! Fear of the Russians and nuclear holocaust didn't eclipse the nuns. To this day the image of a nun, a chalkboard, and a sentence to the diagramed makes my palms sweat. I found out early that writing the spelling words you missed 25 times and spelling each of those words three different ways brought down the wrath of God. bugs I can't go to SeaWorld... all those damn penguins. And seeing a metal-edged yardstick.... I've been told that nothing is more feared than a nun with a yardstick. Woke up screaming from a nightmare about a nun slicing Velvetta with a brass-edged yardstick. <Shudder>
Badger Mountain Charlie SASS #43172 Posted January 10, 2014 Posted January 10, 2014 Sister Mary Thecla had a ruler that was 1" square, and It had all sorts of measurements on it. But the critical one was how wrong Charlie had gone, and now many stripes he was to get.
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