Red Logan #12252 Posted August 7, 2011 Share Posted August 7, 2011 THE DEAD PARROT At dawn the telephone rings, "Hello, Señor Rod? This is Ernesto, the caretaker at your country house." "Ah yes, Ernesto. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?" "Um, I am just calling to advise you, Señor Rod, that your parrot, he is dead". "My parrot? Dead? The one that won the International competition?" "Si, Señor, that's the one." "That's a pity! I spent a small fortune on that bird. What did he die from?" "From eating the rotten meat, Señor Rod." "Rotten meat? Who fed him rotten meat?" "Nobody, Señor. He ate the meat of the dead horse." "Dead horse? What dead horse?" "The thoroughbred, Señor Rod." "My prize thoroughbred is dead?" "Yes, Señor Rod, he died from all that work pulling the water cart." "Are you insane? What water cart?" "The one we used to put out the fire, Señor." "Good Lord! What fire are you talking about, man?" "The one at your house, Señor! A candle fell and the curtains caught on fire." "What? Are you saying that my mansion is destroyed because of a candle?!" "Yes, Señor Rod." "But there's electricity at the house! What was the candle for?" "For the funeral, Señor Rod." "WHAT FUNERAL???!!!" "Your wife's, Señor Rod". She showed up very late one night and I thought she was a thief, so I shot her with your new Kreighoff Limited Edition Custom Gold Engraved Trap Special with the custom Wenig Exhibition Grade Stock. SILENCE........... LONG SILENCE.........VERY LONG SILENCE. "Ernesto, if you scratched that shotgun, you're in deep do-do." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocWard Posted August 7, 2011 Share Posted August 7, 2011 Ahh... Krieghoffs. Works of art. Although an Umbarger stock on one is also a sight to behold... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Badger Mountain Charlie SASS #43172 Posted August 8, 2011 Share Posted August 8, 2011 Not quite as nice as the plastic on the Mossburg. Especially the one with the pistol grip forearm. But what the heck, a piece of lumber is a piece of lumber. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whiskey Business Posted August 8, 2011 Share Posted August 8, 2011 A really pricey piece of lumber. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocWard Posted August 8, 2011 Share Posted August 8, 2011 Not quite as nice as the plastic on the Mossburg. Especially the one with the pistol grip forearm. But what the heck, a piece of lumber is a piece of lumber. You, Sir, lack couth. I mean more than most of us on here, at any rate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chickasaw Bill SASS #70001 Posted August 9, 2011 Share Posted August 9, 2011 COUTH ?????????????? Courh ............. I ain't got no stinkin' COUTH CB Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Apache Hawk 60642 Posted August 9, 2011 Share Posted August 9, 2011 COUTH ?????????????? Courh ............. I ain't got no stinkin' COUTH CB Ummmm C.B, I tank yur onto somethin' here ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Capt. James H. Callahan Posted August 9, 2011 Share Posted August 9, 2011 I had a couth one time. A few days of antibiotics cleared it right up! JHC Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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